Teen Beach Movie parties on Disney Channel, bring your wrenches!

Disney Teen Beach Movie
[adrotate banner=”1″]Friday, July 19, brings us the world premiere of the newest Disney Original Movie, Teen Beach Movie, which is a mish-mash of those Frankie and Annette beach movies, Grease, High School Musical, and Pleasantville. Two teens get sucked into a classic 1960s beach party movie, but their addition changes the plot of the film. They got to make things right or they’re stuck forever in a musical world.

The most exciting thing about Disney’s Teen Beach Movie is the Official Disney’s Teen Beach Movie Origami Wrench pdf that you can download from the Disney’s Teen Beach Movie site.

The plot:

Brady and McKenzie are both high school friends. They both enjoy surfing and watching their favorite beach musical film, Wet Side Story, set in the 1960’s era of rock ‘n roll, bikers, beach and surfing. They’ve talked so much about how they would love to be in their favorite movie to live that era. After the death of her mother, McKenzie promised her aunt she would focus on her future, including college, and has to move away with her, putting her relationship with Brady in trouble. After Brady insists on McKenzie having one last wave with him, they both fall off their boards. As they wake up, they realize they have been transported into Wet Side Story and decide to play along with the plot and try to fit in. But after their film’s lead man falls for McKenzie, as well as their film’s lead girl falls for Brady, the film’s plot changes completely, starting a whole new plot and slowly causing Brady and McKenzie to become part of the movie itself. It’s up to Brady and McKenzie to make sure the film’s plot goes as it originally is to get out of it as well and enjoy one more day together.

Jeffrey Hornaday directs, and Maia Mitchell, Ross Lynch, Garrett Clayton, Grace Phipps, John DeLuca, Chrissie Fit, Kevin Chamberlin, and Steve Valentine star. Teen Beach Movie has the potential to become yet another Disney Channel Classic, combining the singing things from High School Musical with love squares and retro-cool. So check it out if you haven’t ditched your cable, or just buy it on iTunes the next day.

Garret Clayton Teen Beach Movie

"I'm just so tired of all these Star Wars" – You in a few years


[adrotate banner=”1″]Or maybe not, if you are in to this sort of thing! Because we’re getting yearly Star Wars films beginning in 2015! First up will be J.J. Abrams’ Star Wars Episode VII, followed by alternating spin-offs and trilogy films. I’m sure the internet is filled with a bunch of opinions about this, so feel free to check them out. As for me, I’m on the wait and see plan, which doesn’t fill internet columns with paragraphs of angry bile, but does allow me to get on with my day. I will say that people seem to hate Star Wars, but seem to love their idealized version of Star Wars. It’s all very interesting, but I’m just going to be a spectator than participate in the melee.

Then I can loot the dead! MuHAHAHAHA!!!

via yahoo
Disney Star Wars

Links With Cat Ears!

Rina Takeda Battlecats
[adrotate banner=”1″]It’s that time again where I throw a bunch of links at you and you must click them all, Pokemon! Also some news bits that didn’t make the cut into getting their own posts dues to lazines— I mean, because I was busy. Yeah, that’s the ticket! So let’s get on with it!!!

**Monster Island Resort Podcast #95: The History of Mexploitation Cinema with Aaron Soto

**Like a Horrible Dream: Thoughts on the Mighty Kong

**Filmi Geek on Filmi Geek

**Film Dick battles The Slayer!

**FourDK goes on The Savage Hunt of King Stakh!

**Pre-Code takes a Hot Saturday!

**The Cultural Gutter ponders Catharsis Denied: when fiery doom is an anti-climax!

**Xsmarkthespot clues us in to Notable Canadian films of the 1970’s!

**Turban Decay discusses The Visitor!

**Pulp Curry turns the pages of Wake in Fright!

**Permission To Kill discusses Lee – the man (Lee Marvin) and the anthology that he inspired!

**Goodbye Like A Bullet tells us The Way of the Yakuza!

**100 years of Indian cinema: How Bombay became Bollywood – the silent era

**Why is The Adventures of Mighty Bug not playing anywhere near me???!?!

**Names are attached to the big screen version of Divergent, yet another Young Adult Dystopian Future novel turned film. Shailene Woodley is already attached to star, and now Maggie Q, Zoe Kravitz and Ansel Elgort are attached. In this Young Adult Dystopian Future, society is divided into factions based on traits like bravery. Basically the Sorting Hat from Harry Potter became Evil Overlord. So, of course, there is a love story between factions and rebellions and all that junk. Neil Burger is directing.

**Horrible Bosses 2 is on the way. Perhaps this go-around will have something funny beyond Motherfucker Jones? Speaking of which, Motherfucker Jones is not yet confirmed as returning, but he better be!

**Here is a 12 minute proof of concept short for Land of Giants, a steampunk martial arts film starring Mathis Landwehr. It’s another “make a short film to get funding to make a real film” film:

After the storm reduced our world to ruins, the Giants came to us, to punish those who would ever again lay their hands on the magic called “Electricity”.

A long time ago Crutch (Mathis Landwehr) challenged the Giants’ anger. His destroyed knee won’t let him forget the day, they took everything from him. So he ventured out to hunt and kill them.

**Debug is a future-set scifi thriller where six computer hackers sent to debug old computers on an abandoned space freighter must battle an AI that’s gone loopy. Killer loopy. Jeananne Goossen, Jason Momoa, Adam Butcher, Kjartan Hewitt, Sidney Leeder, Jaydn Wong, and Adrian Holmes. David Hewlett directs and Debug is due out in 2014.

**If you want to see some production photos of Wes Anderson‘s The Grand Budapest Hotel, click away!

**People in China are freaking out because former Category III star Diana Pang Dan (Erotic Ghost Story – Perfect Match and Rape Trap) is going to become a politician. Of course, America would freak out as well.

**If you thought Jack the Giant Slayer sucked, maybe you will like Asylum’s Jack the Giant Killer, where the giants are actual monsters! Jane March and Ben Cross star. Mark Atkins writes and directs.

**Wreck-It Ralph presents “Garlan Hulse: Where Potential Lives”

**Disney thinks the world needs yet another live-action Beauty and the Beast movie. Right, Beastly?

Disney is calling this film The Beast, and considering the subject matter of Trance–an art auctioneer is pummeled so badly by his criminal cohorts that a hypnotherapist is needed to coax out the memories of where he hid a priceless painting–indicates that this revisionist take on Beauty and the Beast could be a bit on the dark side.

No word on who will play Hank McCoy.

**Actress Charlie Yeung Choi-Nei has moved into writing/directing with the upcoming film Christmas Rose (聖誕玫瑰). Yeung spent five years writing the legal thriller, the film is about a sexual harassment case that quickly balloons out of control. Aaron Kwok is a former defense attorney turned prosecutor who helps handicapped piano teacher Jing (Kwai Lun Mei) sue her doctor Zhou (Chang Chen) for harassing her during a checkup. But Zhou is a respected physician and his defense attorney is Aaron Kwok’s replacement at his old firm. The trailer is here

paracamelus
**Giant camel bones belonging to a species of Paracamelus have been found in Northern Canada, the bones being identified due to collagen fingerprinting the collagen on the bones. The size of the bones show the species was 30% bigger than modern camels. Paracamelus is a type of ancient dromedary (one hump.) This is the first evidence of a High Arctic camel, though scientists have long suspected that camels had trades associated with arctic adaptation.
Via here and here
Image via

**bridezilla Charlie Powell
via Charlie Powell

Until next time!!!

Green People rumored to be taking over the box office!

Yoda hulk
[adrotate banner=”1″]With the rumors/news of both Marvel’s far future plans for their films and the Star Wars stand alone flick, it would seem that the box office will be getting a bit greener, and not from the cash these films will rake in.

It’s not really a spoiler any more, since several sites rushed over each other to post the news in the headlines of their damn articles, but Latino-Review quoted a source as saying that the Phase 3 Marvel films will include Planet Hulk and World War Hulk. This presumably means that Hulk will be shot into space either at the end of Avengers 2 or the beginning of Planet Hulk. Then by the time Avengers 3 comes about, Hulk will return and be very angry. If you’ve never read the Planet Hulk comics, you literally need to drop everything (even your baby!) and run out and read the comics. It is one of my favorite stories of the past decade, and even got me reading comics again after a long absence (though I went back to ignoring comics again as the last few series I followed have ended and Hulk got really stupid after WWH.) Planet Hulk is basically Hulk transported into a John Carter of Mars style story. It’s full of pulpy goodness, monsters, zombies, fighting, more fighting, evil kings being evil, and weirdo aliens. It’s even been turned into a cartoon feature (though they neglect to include the ending that causes Hulk to return for World War Hulk!)

So needless to say, I hope this part of the rumor is true.

Secondly, the other big rumor is there might be a Yoda stand alone film, possibly an origin story. I personally don’t give a frak about Yoda’s origin and hope it stays mysterious forever, but a Yoda adventure could be cool if done right. But I have no reason to think it will be done right. I also have no reason to think this won’t make a bajillion dollars no matter how done wrong it is. Despite my dark, bitter heart, I know this will be a cash cow and can see why some people are excited. So I will be cautiously optimistic, because that sounds positive even though I can easily spin it into “I told you so, suckers!” when Yoda starts rapping.

With all this green, it is the perfect time for a John Carter (of Mars, dammit!) sequel! Do it, Disney!

Weekend Linkend

[adrotate banner=”1″]I transferred the site over to a VPS this past weekend, learning fun things like Linux and Apache and how to rebuild Apache. Most major issues look fine, just one or two smaller things to clean up. Which means I’ll have time to write more posts and try to make up for all the traffic lost during the multiple times the site was suspended for using too many resources!

While all that was happening, movie news was still raining from Heaven. Dang it, world, still going on while I’m busy! What a jerk… So let’s look at some!

**DurianDave at Softfilm had a song mix on Zoë Baxter’s Lucky Cat radio show, and he did a song-by-song breakdown of all his choices.

**Production storyboards from 15 classic flicks

**The coolest lawsuit of 2012 has happened thanks to some nutter from Belize who claims that some Americans stole a crystal skull from Mayan ruins 88 years ago, and since Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull had a crystal skull in it, it was an unauthorized use of the likeness. Is he asking for a bunch of money from Indiana Jones’ new owner, Disney? You bet! Is his attorney a bankruptcy attorney from Illinois? Of course! Should this lawsuit be thrown out so hard it breaks the sound barrier? Damn skippy!

Just wait until Westinghouse hears about the fridge in the film!

**A story about Captain America that is cool

**Robert Zemeckis was doing the press rounds because of Flight and said that the Roger Rabbit 2 script is written and they are just waiting for Disney to get around to financing it. It would be hand drawn and set in the past like the original, the only difference is it will be 3D.

**Tron 3 has gotten a writer and is going forward (probably due to Wreck-It Ralph making so much dough!) despite the second one being terrible and no one at all caring. When this gets close to release, it’s time to short Disney stock again…

**Speaking of Disney losing money, they’re also planning to do a Don Quixote flick with Johnny Depp, but it doesn’t look like it’s the famous The Man Who Killed Don Quixote film that Terry Gilliam was making at one point with Depp when everything fell apart as shown in the documentary Lost in La Mancha.

**Ready Player One‘s author Ernie Cline is writing a new book called Armada and it’s already optioned for a film at Universal. All we know is:

the ultimate wish fulfillment to every videogame fan on the planet.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, it’s The Last Starfighter except with more gamer callbacks.

**Lifetime and Jennifer Love Hewitt are bringing us Mrs. G’s Bigger Love, which is based on a few fantasy posts at the blog Derfwad Manor. The posts are a gender-reversal of Big Love, where the character Gatticio is a female polygamist married to Hollywood hunks like George Clooney, Brad Pitt, and Ben Affleck. You can read some of the entries via this link near the bottom. It took me a minute to figure out that this was just a few posts being optioned and not the blog itself, which is a middle age woman blog and outside the scope of a blog I would read at all. The gender reversal and fantasy aspects should do well on Lifetime, and hopefully we get some cool internet freak out action once the rest of the world catches wind of Mrs. G’s Bigger Love.

**Kevin Smith basically announced he’s doing Clerks 3 via Twitter. That’s all we know at this point.

**Can’t Stop the Movies meets Dodes’ka-den!

**It’s a CRIMEWAVE! at TheCulturalGutter!

**FourDK goes to the isle of Iodo!

**Exploderbutton presses The Rains of Ranchipur and Bonjour Tristesse!

**NinjaDixon must take some Executive Action!

**The Deadly Doll meets the Junkyard Dog!

**Monster Island Resort chats about gore!

**Here is a Hungarian Star Wars poster from 1977
Hungarian Star Wars

Disney buys Lucasfilm, immediately greenlights Star Wars Episode 7

[adrotate banner=”1″]Disney just bought Lucasfilm for $4 billion in stock and cash and has greenlit Star Wars Episode 7 at .5 past lightspeed, literally in the press release announcement of the deal. Just keep in mind that now that Disney owns Marvel and Lucasfilm, those green bunnies from the Marvel Comics are now canon!

Yes, Star Wars Episode 7 – Lepi Everywhere!!

Jaxxon Lepi

What’s up, Darth?

Here’s the full press release:

BURBANK, Calif. & SAN FRANCISCO–(BUSINESS WIRE)– Continuing its strategy of delivering exceptional creative content to audiences around the world, The Walt Disney Company (NYSE:DIS) has agreed to acquire Lucasfilm Ltd. in a stock and cash transaction. Lucasfilm is 100% owned by Lucasfilm Chairman and Founder, George Lucas.

Under the terms of the agreement and based on the closing price of Disney stock on October 26, 2012, the transaction value is $4.05 billion, with Disney paying approximately half of the consideration in cash and issuing approximately 40 million shares at closing. The final consideration will be subject to customary post-closing balance sheet adjustments.

“Lucasfilm reflects the extraordinary passion, vision, and storytelling of its founder, George Lucas,” said Robert A. Iger, Chairman and Chief Executive Officer of The Walt Disney Company. “This transaction combines a world-class portfolio of content including Star Wars, one of the greatest family entertainment franchises of all time, with Disney’s unique and unparalleled creativity across multiple platforms, businesses, and markets to generate sustained growth and drive significant long-term value.”

“For the past 35 years, one of my greatest pleasures has been to see Star Wars passed from one generation to the next,” said George Lucas, Chairman and Chief Executive Officer of Lucasfilm. “It’s now time for me to pass Star Wars on to a new generation of filmmakers. I’ve always believed thatStar Wars could live beyond me, and I thought it was important to set up the transition during my lifetime. I’m confident that with Lucasfilm under the leadership of Kathleen Kennedy, and having a new home within the Disney organization, Star Wars will certainly live on and flourish for many generations to come. Disney’s reach and experience give Lucasfilm the opportunity to blaze new trails in film, television, interactive media, theme parks, live entertainment, and consumer products.”

Under the deal, Disney will acquire ownership of Lucasfilm, a leader in entertainment, innovation and technology, including its massively popular and “evergreen” Star Wars franchise and its operating businesses in live action film production, consumer products, animation, visual effects, and audio post production. Disney will also acquire the substantial portfolio of cutting-edge entertainment technologies that have kept audiences enthralled for many years. Lucasfilm, headquartered in San Francisco, operates under the names Lucasfilm Ltd., LucasArts, Industrial Light & Magic, and Skywalker Sound, and the present intent is for Lucasfilm employees to remain in their current locations.

Kathleen Kennedy, current Co-Chairman of Lucasfilm, will become President of Lucasfilm, reporting to Walt Disney Studios Chairman Alan Horn. Additionally she will serve as the brand manager for Star Wars, working directly with Disney’s global lines of business to build, further integrate, and maximize the value of this global franchise. Ms. Kennedy will serve as executive producer on new Star Warsfeature films, with George Lucas serving as creative consultant. Star Wars Episode 7 is targeted for release in 2015, with more feature films expected to continue the Star Wars saga and grow the franchise well into the future.

The acquisition combines two highly compatible family entertainment brands, and strengthens the long-standing beneficial relationship between them that already includes successful integration of Star Wars content into Disney theme parks in Anaheim, Orlando, Paris and Tokyo.

Driven by a tremendously talented creative team, Lucasfilm’s legendary Star Wars franchise has flourished for more than 35 years, and offers a virtually limitless universe of characters and stories to drive continued feature film releases and franchise growth over the long term. Star Wars resonates with consumers around the world and creates extensive opportunities for Disney to deliver the content across its diverse portfolio of businesses including movies, television, consumer products, games and theme parks. Star Wars feature films have earned a total of $4.4 billion in global box to date, and continued global demand has made Star Wars one of the world’s top product brands, and Lucasfilm a leading product licensor in the United States in 2011. The franchise provides a sustainable source of high quality, branded content with global appeal and is well suited for new business models including digital platforms, putting the acquisition in strong alignment with Disney’s strategic priorities for continued long-term growth.

The Lucasfilm acquisition follows Disney’s very successful acquisitions of Pixar and Marvel, which demonstrated the company’s unique ability to fully develop and expand the financial potential of high quality creative content with compelling characters and storytelling through the application ofinnovative technology and multiplatform distribution on a truly global basis to create maximum value. Adding Lucasfilm to Disney’s portfolio of world class brands significantly enhances the company’s ability to serve consumers with a broad variety of the world’s highest-quality content and to create additional long-term value for our shareholders.

The Boards of Directors of Disney and Lucasfilm have approved the transaction, which is subject to clearance under the Hart-Scott-Rodino Antitrust Improvements Act, certain non-United States merger control regulations, and other customary closing conditions. The agreement has been approved by the sole shareholder of Lucasfilm.