Green People rumored to be taking over the box office!

Yoda hulk

With the rumors/news of both Marvel’s far future plans for their films and the Star Wars stand alone flick, it would seem that the box office will be getting a bit greener, and not from the cash these films will rake in.

It’s not really a spoiler any more, since several sites rushed over each other to post the news in the headlines of their damn articles, but Latino-Review quoted a source as saying that the Phase 3 Marvel films will include Planet Hulk and World War Hulk. This presumably means that Hulk will be shot into space either at the end of Avengers 2 or the beginning of Planet Hulk. Then by the time Avengers 3 comes about, Hulk will return and be very angry. If you’ve never read the Planet Hulk comics, you literally need to drop everything (even your baby!) and run out and read the comics. It is one of my favorite stories of the past decade, and even got me reading comics again after a long absence (though I went back to ignoring comics again as the last few series I followed have ended and Hulk got really stupid after WWH.) Planet Hulk is basically Hulk transported into a John Carter of Mars style story. It’s full of pulpy goodness, monsters, zombies, fighting, more fighting, evil kings being evil, and weirdo aliens. It’s even been turned into a cartoon feature (though they neglect to include the ending that causes Hulk to return for World War Hulk!)

So needless to say, I hope this part of the rumor is true.

Secondly, the other big rumor is there might be a Yoda stand alone film, possibly an origin story. I personally don’t give a frak about Yoda’s origin and hope it stays mysterious forever, but a Yoda adventure could be cool if done right. But I have no reason to think it will be done right. I also have no reason to think this won’t make a bajillion dollars no matter how done wrong it is. Despite my dark, bitter heart, I know this will be a cash cow and can see why some people are excited. So I will be cautiously optimistic, because that sounds positive even though I can easily spin it into “I told you so, suckers!” when Yoda starts rapping.

With all this green, it is the perfect time for a John Carter (of Mars, dammit!) sequel! Do it, Disney!

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Written by Tars Tarkas

Tars Tarkas

Runs this joint!