Shy Spirit (Review)
Shy Spirit
aka 九月初九之重見天日 aka Shyly Spirit aka Pa xiu gui
1991
Written by Jeng Man-Wa
Directed by Chong Yan-Gin
Shy Spirit is about one thing, which is a nude ghost girl. The film then sets up a nice and ridiculous scenario to get the nude ghost girl, who is nude far less than you would expect for this being a movie about a nude ghost girl. Despite the nude ghost girl being the draw, Shy Spirit is not one of those smutty Cat III ghost films. Though it’s a spooky comedy, like many Hong Kong films the tone will jump around, daring to become suddenly serious or becoming a well-choreographed action film before jerking right back to the comedy.
Shy Spirit also isn’t very good. It takes too long to set up the complicated plot, which then rambles around a while. Large portions of the film focus on Long-Life like he’s supposed to be the hero, even though he does all sorts of bad things like inadvertently kill Hsio, turning her into the “shy spirit” of the title. Sing ends up becoming the hero, though he
Shy Spirit features rival families and innocent people who are caught in the crossfire. The Wang family and the Ko family are rivals, dating back to when both patriarchs were chasing after the same girl as youth, Mrs. Hu. She ended up choosing neither of those idiots, instead picking a sickly guy. All three families have kids at the same time, Mr. Wang celebrates the birth of his son Sing, Mr. Ko celebrates the birth of his son Long-Life, and Mrs. Hu celebrates the birth of her daughter, Hsio. This means another generation of the rivalry. Not only that, but it’s time to tell the fortunes of the three babies, thanks to a traveling priest and his hopping assistant. The priest is Lam Ching-Ying essentially playing his one-eyebrow priest character from the Mr. Vampire movies, and the fortune for Long-Life is more of a misfortune – he’ll age rapidly and probably die at age 23. But if he doesn’t, he’ll live a long life. Also he’ll be weak during the full moon. Does that make him a were-weakling? Strangely, he gets the bad fortune, even though other bad stuff happens.
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Ghost Shark
Ghost Shark
2013
Written by Eric Forsberg and Griff Furst
Screenplay by Paul A. Birkett
Directed by Griff Furst
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Great, another fun toy banned because of some dumb kid…
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G-G-G-G-G-G-Ghost Shark???! Yes, it’s true, a murdered shark returns to life via magic, become a spectral terror that haunts all bodies of water, from the ocean to your cup of coffee. Ghost Shark can manifest anywhere there is wet stuff about, allowing for an array of amazing and ridiculous kill scenes. Slip-n-slides, fire hydrants, the rain, and water coolers all become home for the Ghost Shark.
Finally a legitimate time to use KFC’s terrible “I ate the bones” slogan complete with a bucket!
Though Ghost Shark was made independently of Sharknado, it premiered soon after, and features many crazy shark antics. Thus, comparisons are inevitable. I liked Ghost Shark slightly better, as I feel the story outside of the crazy shark antics is better. While Sharknado deals with a man trying to protect his family in the midst of chaos, Ghost Shark is a revenge tale where teens deal with a problem the authorities think is too crazy to be real. But we’re in the world of SyFy, baby, and Ghost Sharks are just icing on the cake of carnage.
Ghost Shark features one of the best female leads in a monster movie ever. Mackenzie Rosman’s Ava doesn’t just sit around and get into trouble, she’s actively attempting to solve the problem of the ghost shark that claimed her father’s life, saving her sister, and relegating the male lead to also ran status. Ava gets stuff done. Ava is never in a point where she needs to be “rescued” by the male lead in an attempt to shows that strong women always need a guy around. In fact, Ava actively dismisses Blaise, assigning him to watch over her sister. Blaise fails in so many things that he does do, it’s a wonder he manages to keep Cicely from being eaten (heck, Ghost Shark does eat her…then spits her out!) Ava figures out that there is something supernatural at work, that Finch knows something about Ghost Shark’s secret, that the authority figures in town are dumb as a baby’s bottom, and that if anything is going to get done, it’s going to require her to step up and bust this Ghost Shark! She’s also not victim to some false feminism where she kicks butt, but has to do so in skintight leather or torn outfits. After the initial beach encounter, she ditches the bikini for sensible attire.
Once news came out that Ghost Shark was written and directed by Griff Furst, it became a must watch regardless of the premise. Furst’s films for SyFy (Arachnoquake, Swamp Shark, Ragin Cajun Redneck Gators ) are always inventive and fun, filled with crazy scenarios that unfold in ways you don’t expect, and often taking real world issues as inspiration. While ghost carnivores are not a real world issue any place I am familiar with is deal with at this time, places whitewashing their histories and incompetent authority figures are an actual problem.
Reverse Pac-Man!
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Our dad is dead, his cap is red (with blood) Who we gonna call?
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Out of the Dark (Review)
Out of the Dark
aka Wui wan yeh
1995
Written and directed by Jeff Lau Chun-Wai
Stephen Chow is known as one of the funniest people to come out of the Hong Kong film industry. His films have become favorites around the globe and he has legions of fans. Chow’s mo lei tau films cross all sorts of genres, from spies to action to historical to gambling to sports. People argue over which of his films are the best. But one film that rarely is brought up is Out of the Dark, and here at TarsTarkas.NET we believe that is a crime. In fact, I’ve come to the conclusion that Out of the Dark is my favorite Stephen Chow film. But it isn’t a non-stop wacky film, it’s a comedy that’s also a pretty spooky ghost film with a very high body count. Most of the look, costumes, and even a few character names are ganked from Besson’s Leon: The Professional. Heck, there’s even a plant! Director Jeff Lau previously directed several ghost movies, and Chow in the Chinese Odyssey flicks. He moved on to Metallic Attraction: Kung Fu Cyborg among other films.
Out of the Dark doesn’t fit the mold of the normal mo lei tau films, it spends time transcending the genre of wackiness while simultaneously embracing it (yes, that’s possible!) Out of the Dark shows much of the genius later captured by Kung Fu Hustle as a mo lei tau that is more. But instead of following a hero arc, we instead follow a group of people caught up in the sins of an evil family and their revenges from beyond the grave. There are kids brandishing knives, creepy old ladies, possessions, and the one man crazy enough to not be scared of this crap. Someone’s gotta bust ghosts and take up where Lam Ching-Ying left off! So let’s get our Dark on!
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Categories: Bad, Movie Reviews Tags: ghosts, Hong Kong, Jeff Lau Chun-Wai, Karen Mok Man-Wai, Lam Suet, Lee Kin-Yan, mo lei tau, Stephen Chow Sing-Chi, Wong Yat-Fei
Insatiable Obsession (Review)
Insatiable Obsession
2006
Directed by Woquini Adams
Ghosts are common in softcore films because they can be brought in rather cheaply and still make erotic stories that aren’t boring. They also tap into the “love from beyond the grave” vibe that is popular with romance types. We pretty much know why we’re here, so I can’t really give a nice long opening discussion. Especially since I can’t find much information about Woquini Adams, but there is one more Woquini Adams movie in the pipeline.
All the sex scenes are loud vocal affairs. So if you like noise, this is the movie for you. If you also like weird ghost story movies, this is the movie for you. If you like sepia tones this is the movie for you. If you like movies about house repair guys who go nuts and tie people up, this is the movie for you. If you like movies about frogs who eat beans, this is not the movie for you. I am still looking for that movie. But I will find it one day, and it will be glorious.
So have ghost women told you stuff about their murder and then joined in during sex with your wife? Because I can imagine that being rather annoying. Who wants female Slimer in the bedroom? Get out, ghost lady! And stop showing me where treasure is buried! I got enough treasure lying around the house.
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Categories: Movie Reviews, Ugly Tags: Amy Lindsay, Chloe, ghosts, Monique Parent, Sean Juergens, softcore, William Lawson, Woquini Adams
Antoo Fighter (Review)
Antoo Fighter
2008
SinemaMalasysia Link
Directed by Azizi Chunk
What we got here is sort of Malaysian Ghostbusters, but they use stick weapons instead of proton packs. Instead of busting ghosts we’re fighting monsters and demons. The mood is humorous, not taken too seriously, sort of like the actual Ghostbusters. With people running around in wacky costumes fighting monsters, the film can’t not be entertaining, double negative or not. Good fun. What other film let’s you see a giant Monsters Inc. character battle a giant robot? Take that, Iron Man!
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Ghost in a Teeny Bikini (Review)
Ghost in a Teeny Bikini
2006
Directed by Fred Olen Ray (as Nicholas Medina)
Here we go with another amazing Bikini film from Fred Olen Ray (once again directing as Nicholas Medina) that has a fun time spoofing genre movie conventions and making the production look like it was make for ten times the cost. Ghost in a Teeny Bikini diverges from one of the classic plots of bikini films. Normally a relative dies and leaves a business to be saved by bikinis and boobs, but here the dead relative just leaves a bunch of money, and the plot springboards to a murder mystery with a surprise musical thrown in for good measure! In addition, we get the titular ghost in the teeny bikini (played by Nicole Sheridan) running around amidst the over acting. The film itself is a lot of fun and entertaining, but if you were watching for a quick fix of naked chicks, you’d have to put up with distracting plot elements in between, and I can realize how that would turn off people at 3am flipping back and forth between Cinemax channels looking for a flash of skin. Bikini films are known to be chock full of terrible puns, but the puns in this film are the thickest that I have seen yet.
We have a return of many familiar faces. In fact, I have seen so many of the more recent Bikini films that when I watched a few older ones, I was disappointed that most of the actors were different. Yet, there is no clear line jump between generations, as the casts blend into each other, a continually evolving mesh. Thus some older people run around with newer members all the time. It’s like the Circle of Life, except there isn’t a gay lion tossing Darth Vader off a cliff. That’s in Bikini Lion King, due out in 2011. The title obviously refers to the movie The Ghost in the Invisible Bikini, this is so obvious I won’t even point it out.
First, the cast. ROLL CALL!
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