DTV Sequel Madness! – Jarhead, Sniper, Company of Heroes, Tremors

Jarhead 2 banner

Open your faceholes to prepare for the arrival of a whole batch of direct to video sequels that will fill all your senses with wonderment on how all this DTV stuff is getting greenlighted in 2014, long after video store closures have eliminated one of the paths for these films to get profitable. But greenlit they are, so good for them, and let’s just go over the latest group of films.

Not only is there a fifth Sniper film coming out, but also a second Jarhead film, a second Company of Heroes movie, and even a Tremors reboot! All from the same director, Don Michael Paul! You might remember Don Michael Paul as the director of Who’s Your Caddy? or Taken: The Search for Sophie Parker, and now he’s doing a whole host of films!

Jarhead 2: Field Of Firecomes out August 19th on DVD. Check the trailer here.

Battle-scarred and disillusioned by the war, Corporal Chris Merriman is put in charge of a unit whose next mission is to resupply a remote outpost on the edge of Taliban-controlled territory. While driving through the hostile Helmand province, a Navy SEAL flags down their convoy and enlists the unit on an operation of international importance: they must help an Afghan woman famous for her defiance of the Taliban escape the country. Without tanks or air support, Merriman and his team will need all the courage and firepower they can muster to fight their way across the war-torn country and shepherd the woman to safety.

Sniper: Legacy has Tom Berenger and Dennis Haysbert both appear. Berenger starred in the first three Sniper films, and in the fourth, his character’s son was the lead. They team up for this installment. It comes out September 30th

A rogue gunman is assassinating high-ranking military officers one by one. When Gunnery Sgt. Brandon Beckett is informed his father, legendary shooter Thomas Beckett has been killed, Brandon springs into action to take out the perpetrator. But when his father rescues him from an ambush, Brandon realizes he’s a pawn being played by his superiors to draw out the killer. It’s up to the two men, bound by blood, to bring an end to the carnage.

Company Of Heroes: The Fourth Reich is currently shooting in Bulgaria, it’s the sequel to 2013’s Company of Heroes, based on the video game series. In that they have the same title, and that’s about it. No solid information on this one yet, only that it is filming.

Finally, Don Michael Paul is headed to South Africa to begin filming another Tremors film, which he calls a reboot. Whether it is a reboot or just a sequel with a whole new cast, no one knows.
UPDATE: Moviehole has learned that the Tremors film is in fact another sequel, with Michael Gross returning as Burt Gummer! This is great news, as Gummer is awesome and is the heart of the Tremors franchise!

The main source for the Tremors information isa mysteriously deleted post quoted below:

Hey all you “Company Of Heroes” fans, I’m back in Sofia, Bulgaria getting ready to do another in the series. This one’s called “The Fourth Reich” and it promises to have more of the same only better. For all you out there that hated on the first movie, I’m sorry. But I took all your comments to heart and will try to improve on some of the things you were unhappy with. I am always fighting budgetary issues, but I promise to try and give you what you like and minemalize what you did not. Casting is underway, no news on that front, but I hope to deliver some great actors and maybe even a cool name or two. It’s good to be back and working!!! Keep an eye out for “Jarhead 2: Field Of Fire.” Universal is sending it your way on August 19, 2014, and then comes “Sniper: Legacy” from Sony on September 30. My friend Tom Berenger and Dennis Haysbert showed up for Sniper and made the movie a great experience. Great actors and good people, too. After I finish up “Company Of Heroes: The Fourth Reich” I will be headed to Johannesburg, South Africa to reboot the “Tremors” franchise for Universal. Big year ahead and I’m excited to keep it going with the support of all you genre movie lovers out there. Keep sending me your thoughts. They are always welcome, even the critical ones. I’ll shout out to you all soon. Stay tuned!!!!!

If anything else surfaces, we’ll let you know!

Tremors news originally found by JoBlo
image via

Scorpion King: The Lost Throne will confuse the timeline even more!

scorpion uv light

Fun fact: Scorpions glow under UV light, which is probably a byproduct of using their carapace as a sensor to determine what time to go out feeding.

The fourth Scorpion King movie is coming out soon, Scorpion King: The Lost Throne. For those keeping score, Scorpion King 4 is a sequel to a sequel to a prequel (that has a prequel) to a sequel to a remake that is getting remade. Victor Webster returns as the Scorpion King (as he was in Scorpion King 3) No real plot details yet, but usually the Scorpion King loses his kingdom so does a bunch of warrior stuff and gets a kingdom.

via MovieHole

More Christmas Stories

We’re gonna shoot out ALL your eyes!!! It’s another Christmas Story for all as Warners cashes in and makes a DTV sequel to the iconic holiday classic. Sure, there already was an actual sequel My Summer Story/It Runs in the Family that I think just went direct to cable, and a bunch of made for PBS features involving the Parker family narrated by Jean Shepherd and starring Jerry O’Connell as Ralphie for at least some of them. The fact no one knows what I am talking about attests to their popularity.

Expect A Christmas Story 2 (some sites are calling it A Christmas Story Too, an important distinction in the world of who gives a crap!) to drop October 30th and features Ralphie dressed as a reindeer because he works at a department store or something. Also he wants a car. Will the 1938 Hupmobile Skyline convertible be the new Red Ryder BB gun? Of course! The Old Man is going to be Daniel Stern (who was the narrator for The Wonder Years, which was partially inspired by A Christmas Story), and a photo shows him holding the iconic leg lamp. Because this sequel will be all about callbacks! Brian Levant of Jingle All The Way fame directs. Set your Little Orphan Annie secret decoder pin to “Watch”!

Maybe I should make more references to the original film…

Get your Ovaltine or something. Not a finger. Oh, fudge.

A Christmas Story 2

It's true, it's true...

Crystal Sky to destroy cinema, babies

Crystal Sky announced their upcoming features, and they’ve done it: They’ve ruined cinema. Sorry, movies, you had a good run, but three more Baby Geniuses films is enough to force everyone to television…where they’ll be forced to watch the Baby Geniuses tv series.

You might think I am joking, but I am not. The Baby Geniuses trilogy (3, 4, and 5) has been filmed and is in post production. Jon Voight returns for all three installments, and his buddy Bratz director Sean McNamara helmed all three. I don’t know who directed the 13 episodes of the tv series, perhaps Satan had some free time on his schedule.

Not wanting Baby Geniuses to be the low point of their presentation, Crystal Sky also announced plans for Dracula: The 4 Horsemen of the Apocalypse. If you think that sounds like a title for tween girls to swoon over another brooding pale guy, you don’t know tween girls, and are also working for Crystal Sky, because that’s the point. As the explanation goes:

“It’s the first installment in a franchise about a young, romantic Prince of Darkness, his Army of the Undead and a series of events that shake Transylvania to its core,” said Paul, who calls the vampires “the bad boys” of their time. He said the intent is to create a Twilight-type franchise, which will spin off movie after movie in years to come.

Currently no one is cast as Dracula or his fellow bad boys, but Pearry Reginald Teo is directing.

Don’t worry, there are more films coming! Tekken: Rise of the Tournament is a prequel to Tekken, which was awful awful awful. But don’t worry, this one will be directed by Prachya Pinkaew (Ong Bak, Tom-Yum-Goong, Chocolate) which means it could be awesome awesome awesome. I don’t know if I’m able to process this radical shift in fortunes. Hopefully it will be a GI Joe 2, where the second film looks like it will rule.

Crystal Sky also has a giant dog franchise starting with Chilly Christmas. Trust me, there is a giant dog in the film according to the plot synopsis. This is another franchise attempt, and will probably have a better chance than the Dracula film. The world needs more giant dogs. C. Thomas Howell, Tom Arnold and Brooke Langton star, while Gregory Poppen directs.

The official position is a wary excitement for Tekken: Rise of the Tournament, and acceptance of Chilly Christmas even though we’ll probably not watch it.


The original babies now have babies...

Raging Bull 2: Court-Ordered Therapy!

If you are a fan of Raging Bull, then you’ll totally be a fan of the direct-to-video sequel that keeps getting threatened to be made. And now the threat is real! William Forsythe will be Jake LaMotta, and Martin Guigui directs. Raging Bull 2 promises to feature everything you loved about the original, except not really! But in a world with 3 direct-to-video Wild Things sequels, maybe it might not be horrible. Maybe.

via AVClub

Bull in a China Shop

How dare you imply I'm raging, when I'm just really really mad...