Erotic Karma (Review)
Erotic Karma
2013
Written by Tina Hawthorne
Directed by Austin Brooks
Your Erotic Karma ran over my erotic dogma! Just kidding! No dog gets ran over, just some jerky human being! But he then goes on a body possessing spree, so maybe he deserved it. Erotic Karma is a title that seems to have little to do with the actual plot, except maybe the vague notion of New Age philosophies that the whole soul transferring plot device may be borrowed from. But it is also similar to just random ghost stories, so who really knows? In any event, the supernatural aspect caught me a bit off guard, because Mainline Releasing is generally more grounded in reality with their plots. It was an interesting change of pace for them, but doesn’t seem to be a genre they return to with any frequency.
Erotic Karma is written by Tina Hawthorne, the possibly real person who has written a bunch of Mainline films including Obsession, Hidden Treasures, Sex Tapes, Dark Secrets, Birthday Sex, Sexy Assassins, and Naughty Reunion. Her scripts usually don’t follow the standard softcore movie plots, and even have characters discuss things like their feelings, stuff that you just don’t find in softcore movies, and there is some of that going on here as well. The story here could easily be a horror movie topic, and is basically the plot to Fallen except instead of a demon skipping bodies, it is some horny jerk. Horny jerks are the worst jerks, especially when their name rhymes with the work “jerk”, so expect a lot of jerking.
The body changing does allow several characters to flex their acting muscles, including one side character of the type that usually shows up for a one-and-done sex scene. That was probably my favorite part of the film, the various characters suddenly acting like Southern jerk.
One thing not really addressed is the same problem I have with these films whenever people are possessed by ghosts or aliens and then begin having lots of sex, which is the fact all the sex scenes become rape scenes. Not to be a killjoy, but those scenes are a killjoy to my entertainment, so maybe I do mean to be a killjoy. Maybe I do. Three people are possessed in the course of the film, their bodies used by the notorious Professor Dirk Jordan to satisfy his supernatural urges. And also to order people to get him a beer. So few films have the evil villain include people bringing him beer as part of their master plan that it was hilarious.
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Categories: Movie Reviews, Ugly Tags: Austin Brooks, India Summer, Kevin Patrick, Kiara Diane, Mainline Releasing, Paul Case, Rocco Reed, softcore, Tiffany Tyler, Tina Hawthorne
Birthday Sex
Birthday Sex
2012
Written by Tina Hawthorne
Directed by Austin Brooks
The best birthday ever!
Birthday Sex! We all know the song, we all jam it up on the radio, we all sang it ironically on our birthdays and then moved on to some other song. And now, Birthday Sex is also a softcore flick from our friends at Mainline Releasing, your home for movies that often have more to say than what they appear.
It’s Mia’s 25th birthday! Which is cool because she gets a parade of birthday presents that suddenly become terrible presents and her whole outlook on life changes and this birthday becomes the worst birthday ever that’s also the best birthday ever in the long run. Mia’s 25th is time for her to hit a crossroads, where much is made about how she suddenly wants to grow up and be responsible and boring, while her current boyfriend Tyler just wants to live life and party. Now, I’m not going to get into a big discussion about when it is okay to settle down and when you should still be up all night to the sun for good fun, because each person has their own journey in life. 25 is enough time to have had fun, and to be aware of yourself enough to know what you want in life, though that is far from a requirement at that age (and Lord knows I had no clue and am still winging it years later!)
GRRRR!! No one mocks my green earthenware tea set that matches my jacket and green apple paintings!
Obviously, Mia took the Jimmy Eat World line from Praise Chorus seriously, that “even at 25, you gotta start sometime” One wonders if she though no one liked her at age 23 when she was amused by tv shows. One interesting aspect that may be a coincidence or may be on purpose, is that the actress playing Mia has a butterfly tattoo, and later you see butterfly posters on the wall. Symbolically, the butterfly is the mature form, released from the cocoon, while Mia’s journey sees her growing up and becoming the mature form of Mia. She leaves behind her caterpillar boyfriend Tyler to go hang with the fellow butterflies and the flowers.
Packed in this crisis of lifestyle choices are Mia’s two friends, the party girl Kristen (who is crushing on Tyler) and the bitter Sara (who hates all men because she was dumped once!) Never fear, a love interest surfaces in nice guy Simon, but will he and Mia get together, or will all these roommates and different goals and hormones get in the way of a love of the ages. Birthday Sex, surprisingly romantic despite the raunchy title and late night Cinemax air dates.
Tina Hawthorne is rapidly becoming my favorite softcore film writer, to the point where I’m now seeking out some of her films. I don’t know if she’s a real person or just a pen name, but the writing is good, nevertheless. (she also wrote Naughty Reunion, which dealt a lot with the relationships between the various high school stereotypes.) Director Austin Brooks also helmed Sexual Quest, which was another film more about relationships in a marriage than the actual sex, which there was a lot of.
The “I Kicked That Guy Out and Now Feel Guilty Pose” is only for advanced yoga enthusiasts.
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Extra whip? You pervert!
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Categories: Movie Reviews, Ugly Tags: Alan Stafford, Amber Rayne, Austin Brooks, Brandon Ruckdashel, Kenneth Blake, Mainline Releasing, Misty Anderson, Ryan Driller, Sadie Katz, softcore, Tanya Tate, Tina Hawthorne
Sexual Quest
Sexual Quest
2011
Written by Who Knows? No one is credited
Directed by Austin Brooks
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You cashed out our 401k’s to buy WHAT???!
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One thing you don’t see at all in softcore films are minority men. While the women may be every color under the sun (though black women are far less common), the men are almost always white, and the leads are always white. Not only does Sexual Quest break the mold, but it does it in the most smashing way by having an Asian male as the lead. And beyond that, an Asian male in a stable relationship with an Asian female who has multiple sex scenes. I can literally count on two fingers the amount of Asian males I’ve seen in softcore flicks in sex scenes (and both of them were villains with a lone sex scene!) Asian males get the short shift in general in media when it comes to sexuality, so it is good to see that they are making strides into all areas, even if it is one film at a time.
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Who says I have a drinking problem??
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Beyond the breaking ground of casting, Sexual Quest isn’t even written to be progressive racially. It’s just a normal couple film, the couple just happens to be Asian. The couple Jamie and Adam are normal people in a normal relationship, and they have normal feelings and emotions. They act like a real couple, with interactions involving spats and those little arguments you have from time to time. The naturalistic dialogue isn’t improvised (which is painfully obvious from time to time), which makes the lack of a credited writer upsetting. Sexual Quest is a great couple’s flick, the couple in the film cares for each other and their feelings, and work together to make their marriage work. As much fun as it is to watch the softcores involving alien chicks collecting milk jugs full of sperm for their home planet, sometimes it’s good to watch a film that can appeal to a larger demographic. And it gives enough sex scenes that even those who are watching for just one thing late at night on Cinemax won’t have to wait long for the action to start.
Sexual Quest is a journey. Yes, a sexual journey, but not one where people just start having sex with anything that crosses their path. This is a journey of a couple, as they work to explore their relationship and both expand their areas sexual experience and discovery while still respecting the boundaries of the other member of the couple. They work as a team, doing things that is slightly outside their comfort zones to try to please the other person. Often, they find they like the new experiences, but even as this couple has a lot of sex, they aren’t total freaks or anything. They could be any random couple. The vanilla background makes the quest more believable, and makes the eventual conclusion on what their fantasies lead too all the more real.
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These Cosmo sex tips are just a list of menu items from Denny’s!
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Distort-o-arms!
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Categories: Movie Reviews, Ugly Tags: Ann Marie Rios, Austin Brooks, Charmane Star, Dean Black, Duane Carter, Jack Ketchmark, James Kwong, softcore, Victoria White
