Cloud Atlas gets a long confusing brilliant trailer

Buh? That’s what I say when a film needs an almost 6 minute long trailer to vaguely explain what the frak is going on with Cloud Atlas. There is high concept, and then there’s Lindsay Lohan concept. Still, it looks like it could be brilliant. I’ll go on record now and say Cloud Atlas will be a masterpiece. Because it will…or it will be the most ridiculous film of all time. But probably a masterpiece. Based on a 2004 book by David Mitchell I’m now adding to my reading queue, Cloud Atlas took three directors to make it to the big screen – Tom Tykwer and the Wachowski siblings, and the three also did the screenplay.

The cast of awesome actors includes Tom Hanks, Halle Berry, Hugo Weaving, Jim Sturgess, Keith David, Jim Broadbent, Zhou Xun, Bae Doona, Hugh Grant, and Susan Sarandon. Many look to be playing multiple roles spread out over different time periods, each person’s past and future affecting their other lives.

Trailer via
Pic via EW
Cloud Atlas

Robots (Review)


Halle Berry as Cappy
Ewan McGregor as Rodney Copperbottom
Mel Brooks as Bigweld
Robin Williams as Fender
Greg Kinnear as Ratchet
Amanda Bynes as Piper

Let’s take a break from this Mars businesses to do a current movie. Robots is the new CGI film from Fox Animation. All CGI films are inherently superior to traditional animation, as evidenced by Pixar films. Except that statement is a lie, and believed only by morons. Pixar movies are popular thanks to good story telling, they could be animated by shadow puppets and they’d be blockbusters. This movie is mediocrity in action. After weeks of sitting through some cinema pre-show where the director starts yammering on about how he’s wanted to tell the story of Robots for a long time, I thought maybe it would have a good story. At least it would be visually interesting, right? And it was. Visually interesting, that is. The story is lame rehashing and zero character development.

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Catwoman (Review)


Halle Berry as Patience Phillips/Catwoman
Benjamin Bratt as Tom Lone
Sharon Stone as Laurel Hedare
Lambert Wilson as George Hedare
Frances Conroy as Ophelia
Alex Borstein as Sally
Directed by Pitof

A movie destined to fail, 12 years after Michelle Pfeiffer starred as Catwoman in Batman Returns they finally crank out the spinoff. Except it’s not really a spinoff. We don’t know what it is, exactly, except painful. All of the Catwoman backstory from decades of DC comics is thrown right out, in favor os some multiple Catwomen throughout history garbage. I guess Pitof saw Catwomen of the Moon and decided he liked it. Or not. This movie was plagued with production premonitions of it’s terribleness. It took years to develop, and when Berry was finally signed, it looked like maybe there was something good going on. It was all lies and false hopes. The announcement they were ditching all Batman references was a bad sign, and then Catwoman was announced to not be Selena Kyle but instead the never heard of Patience Phillips. It wasn’t a complete wash yet….

Then the photos of the costume hit.

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