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Joshi Zu poster

Joshi Zu (女子ーズ) brings the female Super Sentai!

Joshi Zu

Another Super Sentai (Power Rangers for us Americans!) spoof is in the works, this time featuring an all female team that fights evil suing a “Woman Tornado”! Of course, there are monsters and goons and color-coded costumes, because that’s what is expected! Joshi Zu (女子ーズ) features a team of five women who are forced to work together against their will to battle monsters and other dangers associated with the tokusatsu genre.

Plot:

To battle a malicious monster, five women are gathered in front of Commander Charles against their will. The five women are selected because they each have a family name that represents a color. The five women are filled with doubts about what they are able to do collectively, but they go up against the monster using their lethal technique “Women Tornado”. The five women can only use the “Women Tornado” when they are all gathered together.

Mirei Kiritani(Ace Attorney) plays the red Naoko Akagi, Mina Fujii(Gehara: The Dark and Long Hair Monster and Monsterz – the Japanese remake of the Korean film Haunters) the blue Mika Aota, Mitsuki Takahata the yellow Yuri Kikawada, Kasumi Arimura the green Kano Midoriyama, and Mizuki Yamamoto(Black Butler) the blue Sumire Konno. Their boss Commander Charles is played by Jiro Sato.

Aside from some promo shots from filming and a poster release, there is no monster details for Joshi Zu.

Writer/Director Yuichi Fukuda previous worked on the super hero spoof HK: Forbidden Super Hero/HK Hentai Kamen, which features a guy running around with panties on his head. He also directed Kid’s Police, the crime film starring entirely children that is not Hawk Jones.

Joshi Zu hits theaters June 7, 2014

via AsianWiki

Joshi Zu poster

Joshi Zu Mirei Kiritani

Ghost in the Shell

Live-action American Ghost in the Shell film inches closer to reality…

Ghost in the Shell

A rare image of her with clothes on!


But only if now-attached director Rupert Sanders can find a female lead that he can have sex with!

Okay, MAYBE that’s speculation that the director of Snow White and the Huntress, who ruined his marriage with female star Kristen Stewart, is going to sleep with the star of his new female-centric film. Maybe. But for some reason Rupert Sanders is suddenly hot to trot in the movie world, getting attached to everything ever. DreamWorks has snagged him for their Ghost in the Shell flick, which Spielberg has been wanted to get made forever.

Ghost in the Shell is one of the few anime films I have watched, and my vague recollection remembers it has to do with a secret squad of the Japanese National Public Safety Commission and a female android that is naked a lot. There is a bunch of philosophy that will probably be ignored in favor of trying to turn this into The Matrix (which borrowed A LOT from GITS!)

Rupert Sanders is already attached to: 90 Church – a film about Napoleon, The Juliet – which is called Bonnie and Clyde in space (WTF?), and a remake of Kill List. He’s pretty busy, but a guy’s got to relax, and where else to relax but on a couch. Where’s he’s casting leads…

My take? Expect Ghost in the Shell to stay in development hell, and Rupert Sanders to continue to be sleeping alone!

via Deadline

Cooking with oatmeal Bert

Atlas returns to shrug yet again.

Cooking with oatmeal Bert

A much better book to read!


And the audience will shrug back. The never-popular Atlas Shrugged franchise has begun production on Atlas Shrugged Part III: Who Is John Galt?, and the plan is to get the film into theaters by September, thus influencing the 2014 elections just like Atlas Shrugged Part II influenced 2012 and prevented Obama from ever becoming president.

Oh, wait…

As is tradition (because of incompetence!), the entire cast of Part III will be different than Part II, which was different from Part I. Free market, baby!

John Galt will be played by Kristoffer Polaha, while Laura Regan is Dagny Taggart 3.0, and Rob Morrow is Hank Rearden.

Smart readers will recall that Atlas Shrugged: Part III is partially funded by begging for donations, after failing to ignite the box office during either of the first two parts (Part I made $4.6 million and Part II made $3.3 million!) This welfare queen irony is not lost on Ayn Rand, who spent the last years of her life broke and on government assistance. Because free market, baby! Where would we be if it wasn’t for wingnut welfare keeping useless hacks employed writing things bashing the common man? Much better off.

via THR
image via

Captain Underpants Talking Toilets

Captain Underpants plunges into the movies!

Aw, yes, Captain Underpants will be making his feature length debut in an animated fashion! For those of you who haven’t bothered to look around a bookstore lately, Captain Underpants is a series of children’s books featuring two kids who accidentally hypnotize their principal into thinking he’s the super hero known as Captain Underpants. Then all sorts of wacky things happen. Besides the ridiculous humor, the Captain Underpants books feature flip-o-rama, where you flip pages back and forth rapidly to simulate animation of various action scenes. The series is written by Dav Pilkey and is at 12 published entries, with more on the way (and that’s not including spinoffs!)

The animated motion picture version will be produced by DreamWorks, and the voice cast has just been announced. Ed Helms will voice evil principal Mr. Krupp as well as his unknown alter-ego, Captain Underpants. Kevin Hart and Thomas Middleditch will play George Beard and Herold Hutchins, the two students who hypnotize Principal Krupp. Jordan Peele voices Melvin the nerd, and Nick Kroll will play the villain, Professor Poopypants. A name I hope he keeps high on his resume!

You might be interested to know that the Captain Underpants books are among the most challenged in school libraries. Not only to parents object to the toilet humor (there are actual villainous toilets!), but they complain the books teach kids to disrespect authority. But if your authority is so bad that a children’s book threatens it, maybe your authority sucks in the first place! Captain Underpants and Freedom of Speech for Life!

My one hope is this movie succeeds, and thus we get a movie for The Day My Butt Went Psycho.

via TheWrap

Captain Underpants Talking Toilets

Simpsons Moe Gun NRA

Harvey Weinstein Presents Bad NRA!

Simpsons Moe Gun NRA

Do you want your children not blown away by some gun-toting psychopath? Good news! Harvey Weinstein has taken a break from badly editing Asian films before sitting on them for years and years to launch a secret project:

Mr. Weinstein then revealed his secret project about the gun rights group. “I shouldn’t say this, but I’ll tell it to you, Howard,” he said. “I’m going to make a movie with Meryl Streep, and we’re going to take this head-on. And they’re going to wish they weren’t alive after I’m done with them.”

I’m sure that will totally work and not just be an embarrassingly shrill propaganda piece that drowns out actual debate on gun culture.

The movie mogul said his vision was to scare people away from firearms. He foresees moviegoers to leave thinking, “Gun stocks — I don’t want to be involved in that stuff. It’s going to be like crash and burn.”

Yes, because so much of America is on the fence about guns that a movie will easily convince them, while weekly school shootings and two dozen tiny children being gunned down by one person does not.

All of those shootings have happened, and the federal government has done diddly squat. One of the few states to do anything, Colorado, is now facing a massive backlash due to NRA-funded recalls, which have claimed two state senators(and a third who resigned) and is now endangering the governor.

There should be serious discussions about guns and gun culture, but that will not be happening with a movie. It does not look to be happening outside of a movie, either. So I guess we’re just screwed, pass the ammunition!

I do look forward to the NRA’s response movies, which hopefully get us at least one ridiculously terrifying Guntopia vs the Government film.

via WashingtonTimes

Apple 1984 Ad

1984 returns as a love story in Equals!

Apple 1984

We mine your data and watch every move, but first let’s pretend to be fighting the system!


1984 is back again, this time in the future that’s far past 1984, despite it being brought up by ever political pundit ever whenever anyone in power does anything. 1984, overused much?

Now it can be overused in love form, because the upcoming film Equals is the latest version of 1984. But it’s not based on the book by George Orwell. Nope, Equals is based on the 1956 film version of 1984, which is based on the book 1984. This is sort of confusing, and also crazy. Was that cheaper than buying the rights to the book outright???

Despite this news flashing around everywhere that Kristen Stewart and Jennifer Lawrence’s boyfriend Nicholas Hoult (that’s seriously how he is referred to now. I sort of like it, because it’s almost always the woman who is referred to as someone’s boyfriend), the casting has been announced since October, but this is the first time we have some inkling of what Equals is about. Future love in a dystopian society.

The director Drake Doremus talked through the script with Jennifer Lawrence as well, it’s written by the guy who wrote Moon with Duncan Jones, Nathan Parker. There is an inkling this won’t be terrible. In fact, the less this is like 1984, the better it will be. Become your own future dystopia, Equals!

via AP Interview