Go! Godman: Godman vs. Tsunojiras

aka ゴッドマン対オストタム その1 – その3 aka Goddoman Tai Tsunojirasu

Week of March 8 – 14, 1973

That’s not how you vape!

Godman battles the nefarious Tsunojiras, who is nefarious in that he just happens to be a monster. The audacity of being a monster in the universe where Godman exists is a death sentence, yet time after time we see brave monsters rebelling against this status quo, even if it cost most of them their lives. Sure, a few of them are evil, but what has Tsunojiras done wrong? Godman is a despotic chaos lord who smites all that might even stand against him. We’ve seen plenty of examples in prior March of Godzilla: Godman entries, and be sure to stop by the Godman Splash Page.

Tsunojiras is a lizard kaiju with gigantic eyebrows that are probably horns, but you can never be too sure… He’s got a horn on his nose and little vampire fangs. His favorite fight moves is to egg Godman on by waving his hands to come here.

Five kids witness giant monster Tsunojiras come over the hill, and run while the Chorus of Kids call for Godman. Godman soon arrives, and the fight is on!

Godman karate chops Tsunojiras several times, then uses his God-Sparkle gimmick, where he fires what look like machine gun bullets from three barrels in his fist at Tsumojirasu. It doesn’t work and Tsunojiras is like “Bring it!” Tsunojiras is pretty tough for a monster who has been directly threatened by some rando tokusatsu. We tsuzuku to the next episode…

The fight continues, Godman punching Tsunojiras so hard that the the flap covering the back zipper of Tsunojiras’ costume has opened up. No one at Toho Quality Control cares enough to stop to fight to seal it back up, because the only people watching this are dumb kids and dumb movie bloggers 40 years later. I see what you are doing to me, long-retired Toho executives. And I must say, “Well played!”

Literally nothing happens this episode except homo-erotic monster punching, so let’s tsuzuku to the next…

Tsunojiras shoves Godman off a tiny cliff and then begins kicking him while he’s down. I notice that Godman has really filthy shoes, and Godman gets slapped around some more. Then Godman struggles to his feet and keeps fighting the Tsunojiras. Why did you let him up? Idiot! You just gave Godman the opening he needs.

Godman pulls out his flail to go all Gogo Yubari on Tsunojiras! Godman then does his finishing move using the Godman Supersonic Wave (the swirly chest thing) and blows up Tsunojiras. Poor Tsunojiras, all he ever did was be a monster and be explosive and be seen by children.

In the latter three episodes of this week’s series, Godman went on to fight Elephantar, but those shows are mysteriously not included on the DVD, so we’ll skip them until someone uploads them on YouTube.

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