Wingnut Web – TarsTarkas.NET Declares War on Christmas!l

Santa Claus, you son of a bitch! You’re going down! Christmas must be destroyed down to the last elf, jingle bell, and reindeer. Why destroy Christmas? Because we are evil! Duh! Thus, when we run into a website like Stand For Christmas ( http://standforchristmas.com/pages/home ), TarsTarkas.NET breaks out the candy cane machine guns! Time to riddle these ho-ho-hoes with some HOLIDAY cheer! Focus on the Family is James Dobson’s political tax-exempt group that was founded before I was born, the same group that hates the gays, hates the evolution, hates the women, hates your freedom, and all in the name of Jesus’s love. And now, if your store doesn’t love Jesus enough for Focus on the Family, you’re gonna get mistletoe shoved up your butt!

Someone explain to me how you are a California non-profit if you are based out of Colorado?
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The website rates retailers on how Chirstmassy they are. You are either Christmas Friendly, Negligent, or Offensive. Gap has the most Christmas-Offensive score while Bass Pro Shops is the most Christmas-Friendly.
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So let’s check out the Gap and figure out why!
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Gap hates Christmas!
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Maybe it was just bad customer service instead of a secret war against religion. No, must be a secret war against religion.
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I could have sworn it was Thanksgiving…
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How dare they suggest that as Americans, we have freedom of religion or something? Those jerks!
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This is not widely known, but Jesus was green and red color when he was born
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How dare Gap run ads about the several holidays happening now, it must be a conspiracy by Gap to destroy Christmas!
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Jesus is the reason for the crotch exposure. And what is Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, and Lindsay Lohan doing in a Gap catalogue?
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Only the Federal Government has the right to decide holidays!
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Best Buy scored points by mentioning a Muslim holiday in their flyer. By scoring points I mean they scored negative points!
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Pilgrims? How many Pilgrims are around today? And should we celebrate their holidays for drowning witches and scarlet letters?
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The dumbest part about this site is I have to defend Best Buy, a store I hate for terrible customer service. And what does Minnesota have to do with ANYTHING?
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I wanted to buy $4000 of electronic Blu-ray nativity scenes, but not any more!
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Another guy supposedly spending $4000? In this economy?
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This person is offended that the Muslim holiday is commercialized too much, and that the Christian holiday is not commercialized enough!
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Toys R Us hates Jesus
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Shameful they haven’t exploited the birthday of our Lord!
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Target apparently hates Jesus because they won’t let the Salvation Army outside their store.
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Even my Christmas Ham has “Christmas” tattooed on it!
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This guy is why most customer service employees want to kill themselves
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Nativity hide and seek!
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JC Penney’s loves the death!
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CHRISTmas is materialistic, that’s why it’s so important for me to shop for CHRISTmas!
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I have never seen these books at Boarders, but I wish I did!
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Vampire books at Halloween? Barnes & Noble, you monsters! I hear they even sell that monster Sarah Palin’s book!
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This lone person destroyed Banana Republic, which now no longer exists!
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American Eagle loves porn and hates Jesus
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Christmas has not come yet, thus there is more time for Christmas-Offensive cheer! Join Wingnut Web next time, as we bake Rudolph into a pie! Remember, you can’t spell Satan without Santa!

Runs this joint!

One Comment

  • edx

    December 10, 2009 at 5:56 am

    I don’t see what’s so funny about people wanting to spend their money in a way they like.
    having a celebration sign of every holiday going on at the mo’ except Christmas is assholeish.
    the wingnut web stuff is terrifying and funny and pathetic, however I don’t think this is nutty.
    except for equating the annual celebration of a cool guy’s birthday [at a time which is almost guaranteed to be off, early Christians having co opted other celebrations around the time] with $.

    Reply

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