Wingnut Web – Putting Lipstick on a Swine Flu Edition

They say that laughter is the best medicine. And nothing makes you laugh like the posts at Resistnet.com! Resistnet posts make you feel like a hyena trapped in a nitrous oxide factory. Even if you are on your last breath, just reading the exploits of the crazies will make you crack a smile and put years on your life. Resistnet.com has been waiting since Day One for Barack Obama to declare martial law so they can start shooting nig– I mean, protecting their property. With their guns. By shooting them. At people. Even if they aren’t on their property. We know Obama will declare martial law and try to suspend elections. Because…uh…you see… Resistnet just knows, okay? You have to be crazy to think otherwise.

It begins…

Alice Grannas knows National Emergencies mean she has feet

How dare Obama make it easier to help people! The monster!

Let’s see, racism, faulting Obama for helping people, faulting Obama for not letting 90% of the world population die, a fake Forrest Gump quote, and it is all a prayer.

I think your film is over-exposed.

If we start gunning down people because of this, the Feds will react! How dare they step in the way of me gunning down federal employees!

I’m going to cut to the chase and say Cynthia Sue Braxton is crazy.

Heh heh heh, “HINI”!

What some guy says he heard on FoxNews and email forwards, the two most trusted sources of information!

Beware the spooky powers!

O. Hitler is a famous short story writer.

Let’s stay level-headed and cool…ID chips! ID chips! ID chips! ID chips! ID chips! ID chips! ID chips!

Alice Grannas shoots everyone who comes to the door. 4 Mailmen this week!

Let’s just make up more stuff! WEEEEEEEEEEE!!!! Why am I dying?

News so important it generated multiple threads

Illegal aliens take our jobs and take our vaccines! You know, the ones we don’t want because they control your mind!

If Alice doesn’t die in a hail of bullets from the cops she will cry herself to sleep.

“David” “C.” “please” “stop” “using” “quotes” “thanks”

carol , mouse warrior of SHADY WEBSITES!

Haven’t you been paying attention? Everyone dies.

Melinda is a racist piece of crap, and a perfect example of Resistnet.com and Grassfire.org’s target audience!

Yeah, Bush would never violate our constitutional rights!

12. And Jesus said unto them “Verily I say unto you, suffer the little children and blow them away. 13. Load your glocks and remember to aim between the eyes. 14. Kill them all and let dad sort it out. Amen!”

carol , mouse warrior of CRAZY

Let’s not panic, One World Government! One World Government! One World Government! One World Government! One World Government! One World Government! One World Government! One World Government!

Join Resistnet.com and get involved with creepy conversations like this!

Swine flu is a myth! I saw it on the internet!

One of you please shoot people because I am too big of a pussy to!

Yes, this entire affair is to protect…Virginia?

carol , mouse warrior of ANNOYING STATE REPS EVERY HOUR

Yeah, all those troops in the streets…

Yeah, allowing vaccinations faster totally equals butchering the opposition.

Yeah, why would anyone think Resistnet posters are racist?

Oh No!

Blah blah microchips, military dictatorship, Jesus… but we AREN’T panicking!

carol , mouse warrior of MAHMOUD AHMADINEJAD

It great news for John McCain that there is a military dictatorship in America!

Wingnut Web has to go now, for we caught the sniffles! But don’t worry, the stuff we hack up is nowhere near as disgusting as the average Resistnet.com post, so we’ll be back and stronger than ever soon enough!