It seems like every week some long lost missing child returns to a family and destroys it. Well, every week on Lifetime, that is! The Wrong Child continues this wonderful tradition, but gives us Vivica A. Fox and Gary Daniels as the couple who get an unexpected bonus kid out for revenge! At least this time they aren’t also being murdered by the internet, so it’s only family drama.
Wealthy in her own right, Renee is happily married to the apparently successful architect Charles until Andrew, who claims to be Charles’ son, shows up on their doorstep. Charles seems suspicious of the teen, but Renee and her daughter are ready to welcome him with open arms — until they both realize that Andrew is a sociopath with an old grudge and a penchant for murder.
The Wrong Child stars Vivica A. Fox, Gary Daniels, Robbie Davidson, Stevana Jackson, Tracy Nelson, Helene Udy, and Alissa Latow. It’s written by Matthew Jason Walsh (The Wrong Roommate, Petticoat Planet) and directed by David DeCoteau! Yes, that David DeCoteau! The A Talking Cat!?! David DeCoteau!
Weirdly, there is no trailer nor stills to be easily found, so enjoy the film poster.
The Wrong Child premieres Sunday, July 26th on Lifetime!
aka Prison Break
Written by Edward DeRuiter
Directed by Christopher Douglas Olen Ray
There is talk in the film world of an all-female Expendables movie with a bunch of names being tossed about and a plot that sounds dumb as crap. While Hollywood talks, Asylum does, and gives us Mercenaries, and all-female Expendables featuring tough ladies doing some dirty work. It’s more of a B-movie femme all star roster, but it’s still filled with cool chicks who go on to kick a lot of butt. Following more Escape From New York meets The Dirty Dozen, Mercenaries sees for female convicts recruited to save the daughter of the president from a female potential dictator. Along the way we have plenty of shooting, stabbing, kicking, punching, breaking, betraying, and quipping, making Mercenaries a must-see event for action fans!
The President’s daughter Elise Prescott is ambushed in Kazakhstan, and not by Borat. Military leader Ulrika demands the US invade her country and install her as leader, or else! The US keeps this under wraps for now, and CIA agent Mona Kendall figures the best way to sneak in is to send women because Ulrika hates all men (except her right-hand man Grigori Babishkov) and thinks women are weak. As there are no experienced women to infiltrate the prison, they need to “think inside the box” and thus grab some female prisoners at whom they can wave pardons.
Sharknado 2: The Second One
How can the same shark happen to the same guy twice?
The Sharknadoes are back and this time they’re taking on the Big Apple! But New Yorkers aren’t going to just stand by and let their city get destroyed by a bunch of shark-laced tornadoes. Thus the people fight back, and more importantly, returning Sharknado hero Fin leads the fight against the sharknadoes. With Sharknado 2: The Second One, Asylum and SyFy step back into the world of viral creature feature movies, and score a monster hit. Not only was this the highest SyFy original movie ever (with 3.9 million viewers), but it’s also entertaining and fun. The action is bigger and more consistent throughout the whole film, leading to less of the pacing problem that the original Sharknado faced.
Sharknado 2 edges its predecessor with more ridiculous stunts and better graphics. The money shots are given a high quality look to better make cool gifs. The well-paced action provides continual entertainment, beginning with a ridiculously awesome plane sequence that just keeps raising the stakes and the body count. The excuses to get people moving around felt more genuine than Sharknado‘s goal post moving search for family. Sharknado 2 has what is the best excuse for not being able to reach someone by cell phone I’ve seen in a movie (the guy shuts it off so he can spend quality time with his son and not be distracted by work! So much better than random “out of service” shots or just ignoring phones altogether.)
Fin Shepard (Ian Ziering) and his ex-wife April Wexler (Tara Reid), who he is now reconciling with, are on route to New York City, his hometown and where his sister and her family live. But the flight path is right through the latest forming sharknado, and soon the plane is a disasterpiece that Fin has to land himself. Things become a desperate struggle to get his family to safety and to save the city from the sharknadoes, while chomping death flies in the skies and rains down on the people. Only chainsaws, buzzsaw hands, swords, guns, freon tanks, and a host of celebrity cameos can save New York City from nature’s wrath!
Categories: Movie Reviews, Ugly Tags: Al Roker, Andy Dick, Anthony C. Ferrante, Asylum, Billy Ray Cyrus, Biz Markie, Daymond John, Downtown Julie Brown, Ian Ziering, Jared Fogle, Judah Friedlander, Judd Hirsch, Kari Wuhrer, Kelly Osbourne, Kelly Ripa, Kurt Angle, Mark McGrath, Matt Lauer, Michael Gelman, Michael Strahan, Perez Hilton, Rachel True, Richard Kind, Robert Hays, Robert Klein, Sandra Denton, SciFi Channel, Sharknado, Stephanie Abrams, SyFy, Tara Reid, Thunder Levin, Tiffany Shepis, Vivica A. Fox, Wil Wheaton
Mercenaries has an action-packed trailer, as female prisoners are recruited to rescue the daughter of the President, thus lots of things explode and get shot! We got Zöe Bell, Kristanna Loken, Vivica A. Fox, and Nicole Bilderback as the mercenaries, with Brigitte Nielsen as the villainess and Cynthia Rothrock as the lady who organizes the raid. It’s a mockbuster of Expendables 3, but unlike the Expendables movies, it looks like it will be good! The film premieres at San Diego Comic Con July 30th, and released everywhere streaming/VOD/DVD August 8th. How can you not want to see a film that says “Let’s go PMS from hell on this place!”??
A diplomatic official is captured and imprisoned while touring a war zone, so a team of elite female commandoes is assembled to infiltrate a women’s prison for a daring rescue. Starring Zöe Bell, Kristanna Loken, Vivica A. Fox, Brigitte Nielsen, Nicole Bilderback, and Cynthia Rothrock. Premieres at San Diego Comic Con July 30th.
Who has time to wait around for Hollywood to make a terrible all-female version of The Expendables (called The Expendabelles and featuring a plot where they all become hookers for some reason…) when Asylum can just go ahead and do it, and make it a women in prison film at the same time? Yes, a double-decker mockbuster called Mercenaries that takes on The Expendables 3 and Orange is the New Black season 2 (which I am on a break from binge-watching to write this up) It’s also a big middle finger to Hollywood suits who can’t be bothered to have women star in their action films.
What we get in Mercenaries is a dream team of B-movie action actresses – Zoe Bell(Raze), Vivica A. Fox(Kill Bill), Kristanna Loken(BloodRayne), Brigitte Nielsen(Red Sonja), Cynthia Rothrock(Undefeatable), and Nicole Bilderback (Bring it On). It co-stars Tim Abell, Alexis Raich, Alyma Dorsey, and Alicia Vigil.
Christopher Ray directs, from a script by Edward DeRuiter (who wrote 2-Headed Shark Attack). It was originally called Prison Raid, but got a name change like many Asylum productions.
A diplomatic official is captured and imprisoned while touring a war zone, so a team of elite female commandoes is assembled to infiltrate a women’s prison for a daring rescue.
According to the Asylum site, the street date is August 5, 2014, but no word on if this is on DVD, streaming, exclusive to one outlet before others, or what. So keep an eye out for people talking about this film eventually. If a trailer ever surfaces, I’ll post that (once again, Google is failing me!), and if I can get a copy eventually, I’ll weigh in my thoughts as well. The world will stand by, holding its breath, because we all know that TarsTarkas.NET is the word when it comes to female commando movies that take place in women’s prison.
As summer begins to heat up (puns like this are why they pay me the big bucks!), SyFy is breaking out the original films again, now accompanied by lots of marketing gimmicks for maximum saturation of targeted audience age ranges. On that note, the Sharknado rocket blasts off again with the announced Sharknado Week, which will feature not only Sharknado 2, but the first of the new Sharktopus sequels, and the SyFy premiere of Mega Shark vs. Mecha Shark! The full PR release is below, complete with all the information you need to make Sharknado Week on SyFy the best Sharknado Week ever! Don’t forget that the RiffTrax crew are doing their special event on Sharknado on July 10th!
HIGHLIGHTS OF SYFY’S SHARKNADO WEEK (ALL TIMES ET/PT)
Mega Shark vs. Mecha Shark – Saturday, July 26 at 9PM – When the U.S. government creates an exact robotic copy of the original mega shark, this new mecha shark runs wild – with only the original mega shark standing in the way of global destruction. A production of The Asylum, the movie stars Christopher Judge (Stargate SG1) and Elisabeth Rohm (American Hustle). TV movie.
Sharkmania: The Top 15 Biggest Baddest Bloodiest Bites – Premieres Sunday, July 27 at 9PM – This original documentary special takes a light-hearted look back at the 15 best shark movie bites of all time. Comedians, actors and celebrities including Ian Ziering, Brooke Hogan, Richard Moll, Downtown Julie Brown and Mark McGrath discuss their favorite scenes – fun, ridiculous and frightening – from classic shark movies such as Jaws to the outrageous Sharktopus and Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus. A production of Associated Television International. Executive producer: Jim Romanovich. Producers: Dan Goldman, David Stephan. Consulting producer: Robert Corsini.
Sharknado 2: The Second One – Wednesday, July 30 at 9PM – In Sharknado 2: The Second One, the sequel to last summer’s global pop culture sensation, a freak weather system turns its deadly fury on New York City, unleashing a Sharknado on the population and its most cherished iconic sites – and only Fin (Ian Ziering) and April (Tara Reid) can save the Big Apple. The movie, directed by Anthony C. Ferrante from a screenplay by Thunder Levin, also stars Mark McGrath, Kari Wuhrer, Vivica A. Fox and Judah Friedlander, with cameo appearances including Kelly Osbourne, Judd Hirsch, Perez Hilton, Matt Lauer, Al Roker, Andy Dick, Robert Klein, Sandra “Pepa” Denton, Biz Markie, Downtown Julie Brown, Richard Kind and Kurt Angle, among others. Sharknado 2: The Second One is a production of The Asylum.
Sharktopus vs. Pteracuda – Sunday, August 2 at 9PM – In this new Roger Corman movie, the child of Sharktopus goes toe-to-toe with the latest science experiment “Pteracuda” – half Pteradactyl, half Barracuda – in a battle for monster supremacy. A production of New Horizons Pictures, the movie stars Robert Carradine (Django Unchained) and Katie Savoy (Living with Models).