The White Haired Witch of Lunar Kingdom drops a trailer!

[adrotate banner=”1″]The latest version of The Bride with White Hair comes out April 25th, and the trailer has just been released. The White Haired Witch of Lunar Kingdom白发魔女传 – stars Fan Bingbing as Lian Nishang, the woman whose hair turns white when she’s betrayed by a man. Huang Xiaoming is the man Zhuo Yihang. Judging from the scenes, the movie carves its own path and doesn’t follow any of the previous film adaptations. As I’ve not seen a translated version of the original story, I don’t know if it is following that or is wholly unique. The amount of time Lian Nishang has white hair is limited, so just how quickly she goes all white hair revenge I don’t know.

It’s a big budget wuxia flick from Mainland China – which doesn’t have the best track record. Jacob Cheung directs, and he has directed 2006’s A Battle of Wits, which came out at the time China was dropping tons of historical action films every week. It certainly wasn’t the worst of them, so perhaps things will be interesting enough.

The White Haired Witch of Lunar Kingdom

The White Haired Witch of Lunar Kingdom

White Haired Witch drops a poster! (and literally drops an actor!)

[adrotate banner=”1″]The teaser poster for the new upcoming 3D version of The Bride with White Hair (called White Haired Witch and the Moon Kingdom or The Bride with White Hair 3D – 白髮魔女傳之明月天國3D) is up. This time, Fan Bingbing will play the titular white haired lady. (Fan Bingbing has somehow managed to not be in a movie I’ve reviewed except Future X-Cops!) If you recall, the other Bingbing, Li Bingbing, played the same basic character in Jackie Chan/Jet Li’s Forbidden Kingdom. The classic version will always be the 1993 duology The Bride with White Hair parts 1 and 2, with Brigitte Lin in the title role.

The new Bride with White Hair caused some controversy when actor Huang Xiaoming was injured on set, sustaining a comminute fracture in two toes on his left foot. That basically means his toe bones were smashed! Of course, he’s a workaholic, and was soon back in the swing of things despite the injury.

Jacob Cheung Chi-Leung/Zhang Zhiliang directs this new version of the tale, which is from Mainland China production companies. Vincent Zhao stars alongside Fan Bingbing and Huang Xiaoming, along with costars Wang Xuebing, Shera Li, Mark Du, Nicholas Tse, and Kevin Yan.

via Filmsmash and AsianFanatics

White Hair Witch 3d poster

Future X-Cops (Review)

Future X-Cops

aka Mei loi ging chaat

Directed and written by Wong Jing

The background spinning enrages me!

Future X-Cops is a mixed bag, a film that is part-action, part-comedy, part-drama, part-romance. We got robot guys, time travel, yelling kids, loved ones dying, weird slapstick, a dude with a microwave on his head, a guy who is trapped in a TV, an insect cyborg gang, a giant industrial machine, a cyborg cat lady, and hundreds of cops murdered. It’s all part of Wong Jing’s strategy of throwing the whole buffet against the wall and hoping it turns into a Monet painting. But instead we get more of a Thomas Kinkade.

When Future X-Cops was first announced, it was announced as the title Future Cops, which instantly made everyone think it was a remake of Wong Jing’s Future Cops, especially since Wong Jing was writing and directing this one. But as more details came out, suddenly the film was titled Future X-Cops and bared little resemblance to Future Cops except ripping off the basic plot of cops from the future being sent back in time to protect someone from being killed by bad guys.

In the future, gas shortages lead to go-kart madness!

It has been nice seeing Hong Kong start to pump out some more SciFi movies, but between this and Kung Fu Cyborg we have a ways to go before Hong Kong becomes a SciFi action mainstay. But some day they’ll produce things on par with I Love Maria again!

Like recent movie Beauty on Duty, there are a bajillion production companies and a bajillion producers for this flick. At this point, anyone with a spare $5 can be a Hong Kong producer and you can just have your named added to the wall of text during the opening credits.

Originally I was going to write a short version of this review, but the more I kept watching, the more I kept getting confused and angry and weirdly entertained, but not at the parts I should be entertained at. Thus, the review now is pretty long. Feel free to skip reading it and just look at the pictures, I’m under no delusions that 90% of you don’t do just that anyway. This text is just for us cool 10%ers. You know, the ones who are awesome.

Every one of these characters miss

Kidd Zhao (Andy Lau Tak-Wah) – He’s a cop, he’s from the future, and he’s an x. Whatever that means. But it does mean he’s a Future X-Cop! He’s also a robot, which sorts of makes up for his awful name. Andy Lau was in Future Cops besides being in Future X-Cops, making him the expert of Wong Jing films involving cops and futures.
Holly Wang (Barbie Hsu Hsi-Yuan) – Holly Wang is a cop from the present who likes Kidd Zhao, but he can’t like her back because then history will change and JFK will marry Hitler or something. So instead Holly Wang has to just be sad and look pale. So, so pale.
Kalon (Fan Siu-Wong) – Kalon is a evil cyborg guy who used to have a whole gang of cyborgs until Kidd Zhao killed most of them. Kalon’s crab claw cyborg stuff are upgraded to wings, snake arms, and other goofy stuff. Fan Siu-Wong was just on TarsTarkas.NET in Beauty On Duty, but he just couldn’t stay away!
Fiona (Tang Yi-Fei) – Kalon’s girl is a cyborg cat lady! She also goes back in time with her man so when they’re defeated by Kidd Zhao they’ll die together. Tang Yi-Fei is having so much fun being an evil cyborg cat lady it’s awesome. Just enjoy her over-acting cat moves and ridiculous smile as she does her moves.
Kiki Zhao (Xu Jiao) – Hey, that boy from CJ7 is a girl now! Kidd Zhao brings his daughter back in time with him for some reason because I guess they don’t have laws against bringing your relatives into harm’s way in the future.
Millie (Fan Bing-Bing) – Speaking of relatives in harm’s way, Kidd Zhao’s wife was also a x-cop in the future. Notice how I used the past tense? That’s because she won’t make it past the 20 minute mark!
After The Dark Knight, there was nowhere for the franchise to go but down

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Chinese What Women Want Coming to Read Your Mind

[adrotate banner=”1″]Gong Li will star in the Chinese version of What Women Want, that Mel Gibson comedy where he can hear womens’ thoughts. Andy Lau will be the guy who hears thoughts and Chen Daming is directing. Gong Li was brought on to kick Fan Bing Bing off of the project. Poor Fan Bingbing, no one loves you! Maybe you should learn to read minds to know What Producers Want.

Shaolin – New epic film with Jackie Chan, Andy Lau

[adrotate banner=”1″]Jackie Chan, Andy Lau, Wu Jing, Yu Shaoqun, Fan Bingbing, and Nicholas Tse will star in an update of Shaolin Temple (a film that made Jet Li a big star) filmed on the grounds of the Shaolin Temple in Dengfeng, China called Shaolin. The update will be moved forward several decades so it takes place during the Pacific War (aka World War 2.) Benny Chan directs and the action choreography is by Corey Yuen. Expect it out in 2010.

Nicholas Tse will play a wealthy young man who finds refuge in the temple after a tragic incident in his family. He meets his kung fu master, played by Jackie Chan, in the temple as well as future enemies.


Future Cop images

[adrotate banner=”1″]Here are a bunch of images of production stuff from the upcoming Future Cop movie starring Andy Lau, Fan Bing Bing, Barbie Hsu, Xu Jiao, Da S, Mike He, Liu Yang, and Luo Jia Ying (who cross-dresses) Directed by Wong Jing. The film is not to be confused with Future Cops from 1993, despite a similar premise of cops traveling back in time to protect someone who affects the future. In this one, Andy Lau plays a policeman who time-travels from year 2080 to present day to protect a professor who solves the energy crisis.
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Future Cops or EARMUFF COPS???