Atlas returns to shrug yet again.
And the audience will shrug back. The never-popular Atlas Shrugged franchise has begun production on Atlas Shrugged Part III: Who Is John Galt?, and the plan is to get the film into theaters by September, thus influencing the 2014 elections just like Atlas Shrugged Part II influenced 2012 and prevented Obama from ever becoming president.
Oh, wait…
As is tradition (because of incompetence!), the entire cast of Part III will be different than Part II, which was different from Part I. Free market, baby!
John Galt will be played by Kristoffer Polaha, while Laura Regan is Dagny Taggart 3.0, and Rob Morrow is Hank Rearden.
Smart readers will recall that Atlas Shrugged: Part III is partially funded by begging for donations, after failing to ignite the box office during either of the first two parts (Part I made $4.6 million and Part II made $3.3 million!) This welfare queen irony is not lost on Ayn Rand, who spent the last years of her life broke and on government assistance. Because free market, baby! Where would we be if it wasn’t for wingnut welfare keeping useless hacks employed writing things bashing the common man? Much better off.
Categories: Culture Wars, Movie News, Wingnut Web Tags: Atlas Shrugged, Wingnut Web
Atlas Shrugged mooches its way to a third installment!
If there is one group of people who demonstrate time and time again they have no concept of the Free Market, it is libertarians. Despite lack of banking regulation destroying the world’s economy, they call for less regulation. Glorious Libertopia would feature for-profit schools, for-profit police, for-profit military, and for-profit everyone having nukes. And, yet, none of this libertarian heroes bothered to move to Somalia when there was no government there. I wonder why…
The Free Market has told the film adaptation of Atlas Shrugged to go take a hike not once, but twice! Both times, the films bombed, obviously due to Obama and the liberal media spreading lies about Atlas Shrugged. It certainly isn’t because the films are ridiculous, the story God-awful, and the ideology bankrupt and disgusting.
So doing what any good fighters against beggars and parasites would do, Atlas Shrugged has turned to Kickstarter to get Part III in theaters in time to lose money before the 2014 election.
The producers are quick to point out that they aren’t asking for the full amount, no! They only want $250,000 to supplement the $10 million budget. First of all, $10 million my foot! Someone is skimming off the top or inflating the budget (probably both!) Secondly, the $250,000 goal is stated to just be for the free publicity that Kickstarter provides. Now, Kickstarter provides no free publicity, but blog posts making fun of this action do. So in a small way, I am helping Atlas Shrugged Part III out. But in a realistic way, I’m not, because most people who drop by TarsTarkas.NET aren’t Libertarians who would be unaware that the Atlas Shrugged Kickstarter is underway. The news of the third film will have been promoted all over Wingnut websites across the WWW, in between the latest stories of how Obama did 9-11 because he’s an Illegal Communist Nazi Muslim and screaming diatribes to shut down the government, except for that Social Security money we all rely on.
Wingnut Welfare is a real phenomenon, and the producers of Atlas Shrugged must be exceptionally bad at it to require a final dose of free money directly from the rubes. Heck, even Joe the Plumber somehow has managed to make a nice existence off of free money from billionaires. This means the producers burned some very powerful bridges either through incompetence or just terrible interpersonal skills. Again, probably both.
Atlas Shrugged: Who is John Galt? (the official title) has no announced cast despite a fall 2013 filming date. People looking at your calendars might note that it is currently fall 2013. As the original film had almost the entire main cast replaced for the first sequel, I think we shall see a repeat of that phenomenon.
Atlas Shrugged Part I made $4.6 million on a $20 million budget. Atlas Shrugged Part II made $3.3 million on a $10 million budget. If these trends continue, I suggest investing your money in disco record sales like Disco Stu says!
Producer Harmon Kaslow says “The day we launch the Kickstarter campaign, haters are going to come alive. They’re going to come after us in droves, attacking us everywhere online.”
To Mr. Kaslow I say “Hi!”
Kickstarter intentionally not linked.
Categories: Culture Wars, Movie News Tags: Atlas Shrugged
Atlas Crapped
The Free Market just went all John Galt on Atlas Shrugged Part 1 (of 3), preventing the two sequels from being made.
Luckily, the producer is a man and accepts that decision…just kidding! He’s a big baby like all Libertarians and is whining about “critics”!
“Critics, you won,” said John Aglialoro, the businessman who spent 18 years and more than $20 million of his own money to make, distribute and market “Atlas Shrugged: Part 1,” which covers the first third of Rand’s dystopian novel. “I’m having deep second thoughts on why I should do Part 2.”
…
“The New York Times gave us the most hateful review of all,” said Aglialoro, who also has a writing credit on the movie. “They didn’t cover it.”
No, wait, he’s Going Galt from making Ayn Rand films!
“Why should I put up all of that money if the critics are coming in like lemmings?” Aglialoro said. “I’ll make my money back and I’ll make a profit, but do I wanna go and do two? Maybe I just wanna see my grandkids and go on strike.”
Can’t even keep a consistent excuse during one simple interview. If you want to see Atlas Shrugged Part 1, I’m sure some conservative astroturf organization will buy like a million dvds to give away free and you can see it then.
But first…
he has a dramatic script called “Poker Room” in development. “Maybe the critics will be kinder to that one,” he said.
I can’t wait. To not watch that, either.
Categories: Movie News Tags: Atlas Shrugged, Ayn Rand, John Aglialoro, Poker Room
Atlas Shrugged IS filming!
Atlas Shrugged is filming for real! And One Tree Hill’s Paul Johansson is starring and directing!
Why the rush to get a crappy version made? Because otherwise producer John Aglialoro would have lost the rights, which he paid $1 million for 20 years ago. This flick is budgeted at $5 million. Yes, $5 million. And it is Atlas Shrugged Part One, so it isn’t even the whole story! I guess Part Two will just be a movie of the super-long speech that slows down all the rape scenes Ayn Rand fans just love. This will be awfully hilarious.
Categories: Movie News Tags: Atlas Shrugged, Ayn Rand, John Aglialoro, Paul Johansson