Zone Fighter Episode 20 – Gekitou! Faitaa-no Uta-ga Kikoeru

Zone Fighter Episode 20 – Gekitou! Faitaa-no Uta-ga Kikoeru

aka 激闘! ファイターの歌が聞える aka Desperate Struggle! Can You Hear Fighter’s Song? aka Fierce Fight! Can You Hear Fighter’s Song?
Zone Fighter 激闘! ファイターの歌が聞える
1973
Written by Shiro Ishimori
Directed by Masao Minowa

March of Godzilla 2014

I’m going to watch this loop all day!

Zone Fighter goes Creepytown with this sorted tale of child abduction, creepy child abductors, creepy children, and children in mortal danger thanks to creepy aliens. Takeru Jou gets kidnapped once again (this seems to be his full-time job on the show), and there are more little boys wearing Japanese short shorts thank you can shake a To Catch a Predator DVD at!

But besides that, Zone Fighter finally has the Garoga do something evil (aside from the random gunning innocent people down) that affects Zone Fighter, and almost makes him change his fighting strategy. Until he remembers being violent will solve the problem regardless.

Zone Fighter 激闘! ファイターの歌が聞える

Great, a stick-shift monster!


Goram is one of the cooler-looking Zone Fighter terror-beast monsters, and I say that just because I like monsters with two heads. But he gets a bum break as Zone Fighter continues his murder spree. Poor Goram.

If you need a refresher on who this ultra-violent Toho tokusatsu is and why we should care and why he’s in these March of Godzilla series, drop on by the Zone Fighter Splash Page! And never fear, Godzilla will actually be in the next episode. But first….

Zone Fighter 激闘! ファイターの歌が聞える

Bambi Meets Godzilla prequel?


AKira and his gang of short shorted little Japanese boys are running around town talking with toy store owners and having that good wholesome fun boys in short shorts have. They’re being followed by another kid in short shorts, who is soon harassed by a creepy old guy with gloves. We all know gloves = Garoga, and soon the creepy old guy is grabbing the kid and Takeru Jou bikes by just in time to be in the wrong place at the wrong time and get kidnapped AGAIN!!!

Seriously, Takeru Jou! Kidnapped again? WTF??

Please note that this Garoga is a Red Garoga that has red stripes on his antenna that make him look like he has candy cane antennas.

Zone Fighter 激闘! ファイターの歌が聞える

It’s getting hot in here, so take off all your clothes!


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Posted by Tars Tarkas - April 21, 2014 at 11:35 pm

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Moms’ Night Out is a Christian Moms Hangover movie!


Moms’ Night Out is a family-friendly feature opening up on Mother’s Day weekend for maximum box office targeting. It’s a Christian family comedy that appears to be modeling itself after The Hangover, but with all the jokes Mommy-friendly.

If you have any doubt that this is a Christian film, just check out their Tumblr, The Mom Factor. I have nothing against Christian films and this will certainly do well in its targeted demographic, and their children who are looking for a cheap Mother’s Day gift. (Or maybe not so cheap, what with the price of movie tickets these days!)

All Allyson and her friends want is a peaceful, grown-up evening of dinner and conversation . . . a long-needed moms’ night out. But in order to enjoy high heels, adult conversation and food not served in a paper bag, they need their husbands to watch the kids for three hours—what could go wrong? MOMS’ NIGHT OUT is an endearing true-to-life family comedy that celebrates the beautiful mess called parenting.

As you can see, hijinks ensue. Moms’ Night Out stars Sarah Drew, Sean Astin, Trace Adkins, Andrea Logan White, and Patricia Heaton (who also produces.) It is directed by The Erwin Brothers, Jon and Andrew.

For those of you panicking that you forgot when Mother’s Day was this year, it is on Sunday May 11th, 2014! Better get your gifts now!

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Moms Night Out Movie

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Posted by Tars Tarkas -  at 11:30 am

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Zone Fighter Episode 19 – Meirei “K Suisei-de Chikyuu-wo Kowase”

Zone Fighter Episode 19 – Meirei “K Suisei-de Chikyuu-wo Kowase”

aka 命令『Kスイ星で地球をこわせ』 aka Order: Crush the Earth With Comet K! aka Order: “Destroy the Earth with Comet K”
Zone Fighter 19 命令『Kスイ星で地球をこわせ』
1973
Written by Yuji Amamiya
Directed by Ishiro Honda

March of Godzilla 2014

Zone Fighter – an eye-popping good time!

People and webcrawler bots, we have a situation! Zone Fighter is not the mild-mannered defender of Earth we were led to believe. He is in fact a stone cold butcher murderer who surgically severs opponents body parts and then uses their corpse for his own devious means. I know it may come to a shock, that Zone Fighter, who kills almost every opponent he faces, is some sort of monster, but unfortunately the facts bear that conclusion out. Zone Fighter slices and dices poor Gundarguirus, then tosses his dismembered torso at an approaching comet. This unfortunate corpse desecration is a war crime, and Zone Fighter needs to be dragged in front of an international tribunal immediately for his crimes.

As in last time, this is an episode directed by the master Ishiro Honda, but this episode actually feels like an Ishiro Honda episode and not just kiddy fluff. But there is some goofy stuff still, and then things go insane for that violent stuff I mentioned. Basically, Ishiro Honda helped direct Zone into a period of murderous destruction. So, yay? I guess.

Zone Fighter 19 命令『Kスイ星で地球をこわせ』

Christopher Nolan’s Interstellar!


Make sure to drop on by the Zone Fighter Splash Page if you need a refresher of who is who.

When last we left Zone Fighter, he was losing a fight to the very lame Gundarguirus. Zone Fighter is out of energy and collapses like a scrub. Gundarguirus then wanders off instead of killing him, perhaps obeying orders from the Red Garoga, perhaps just being a moron. Who knows? What is important is Gundarguirus did not kill Zone Fighter when he had the chance.

Zone Fighter 19 命令『Kスイ星で地球をこわせ』

Ring toss games are always rigged. You got to play the game where you race horses by squirting water into clown mouths!


Akira and Hotaru take Hikaru to relax a pool side as they splash around in a hotel swimming pool. I guess that’s how you wind down when you’ve just been almost murdered in a monster fight. Hikaru isn’t about relaxing and needs to call his dad for help, while the audience wonders what the whole point of this brief pool section was, unless it was to get Hotaru in a black bikini again. Hopefully it wasn’t to get Akira back into swimming trunks.

Zone Dad and Takeru are concerned about the comet, and Hikaru races off, realizing he still has to go save the world and stuff. Akira and Hotaru take a ride in Smokey to search from the air for Gundarguirus.

Zone Fighter 19 命令『Kスイ星で地球をこわせ』

We’re not wearing pants, over.


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Posted by Tars Tarkas - April 20, 2014 at 7:52 pm

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Tom Yum Goong 2 (Review)


Tom Yum Goong 2

aka ต้มยำกุ้ง 2 aka The Protector 2
Tom Yung Goong 2 Protector
2013
Written by Eakisit Thairaat
Directed by Prachya Pinkaew

Tom Yung Goong 2 Protector Jeeja
An elephant gets stolen again, causing Tony Jaa to kick lots of people again. This time, the stunts are bigger and 3D driven, but also more CGI enhanced and less realistic, which is a shame. There is no long tracking shot like in Tom Yum Goong, and the more memorable fights are remembered because of their gimmicks, not because of their awesomeness. But that sounds like I’m bagging on Tom Yum Goong 2 a bit hard, it was still some good fun, even if it can’t live up to it’s predecessor. And let’s face it, there aren’t many martial arts films that can.

Tom Yum Goong 2 went into production in August 2011. It was delayed by horrible Thailand floods, Tony Jaa doing weird things, production infighting, Jeeja’s unplanned pregnancy, and a bunch of other problems too boring to reiterate. It’s more of a minor miracle the film was completed at all, and isn’t terrible. But the money and the problems changed a few things for the worse, and didn’t give anything in return.
Tom Yung Goong 2 Protector
The fights are now 3D, so there is less continual choreography and long shots and more 3D-ish effects, which sort of makes them worse. The made-for-3Dness makes the CGI additions a lot more noticeable, especially when you aren’t watching in 3D. But even if I was, there wasn’t that much going on that made me wish I was watching in 3D. 3D doesn’t make the kicks any harder, nor does it make the tracking shots suddenly several minutes long. All we get is a few random CGI items floating across the screen. The most creative shots they didn’t even use outside of one part, which was a POV facecam as Kham was running from a bunch of goons.
Tom Yung Goong 2 Protector eeja

Kham (Tony Jaa) – Kham is back and he’s still got his elephant, but now the elephant Korn is in danger…oh, wait, that happened last time. So Kham now has to beat up a lot of people…oh, wait, that happened last time! Eh, just enjoy him kicking butt!
Ping Pong (“Jeeja” Yanin Vismistananda) – Ping Pong and her sister Sue-sue (Theerada Kittiseriprasert) walk in on Kham standing over the body of their murdered uncle, and immediately begin attacking him and chase him down. Only after an examination of the corpse does Ping Pong realize their mistake, but by then Sue-sue has been killed by Number 02. Ping Pong uses drugged needles and agility to defeat larger foes.
Mr. LC (RZA) – Leader of an underground fighting club that does all sorts of bad things, including gun running and getting involved in international assassination attempts to foster dictatorial ambitions of warlords. He never loses, so don’t tell him he lost. His group is ranked, but he made sure to tattoo Number 00 on his head so we all know he’s the best that ever was.
Sergeant Mark (Petchtai Wongkamlao) – Kham’s old friend from Australia is in Thailand helping out with all the diplomatic things going on, and gets involved with Kham’s latest elephant kidnapping party.
Number 02 (Marrese Crump) – Largely silent fighter who wants to be the best fighter there ever was, and will punch whoever and whatever it takes to get there. Murders with a unique series of close blows. Has a complicated honor system, but is still pretty evil and loyal to Mr. LC. Marrese Crump was RZA’s stunt double on The Man with the Iron Fists, and got promoted to costar here.
Number 20 (Yayaying Rhatha Phongam) – One of Mr. LC’s fighters, loyal to him because he saved her during a sexual assault and trained her in fighting so she could get revenge on her attackers.

Tom Yung Goong 2 Protector
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Posted by Tars Tarkas - April 18, 2014 at 7:53 am

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Noboru Iguchi returns with Live (ライヴ)


Noboru Iguchi is constantly pumping out new and weird films, and his latest Live (ライヴ or Raivu)looks to be another fun festival of lots of people dying in violent ways while goofy things happen. Naoto Tamura (Yuki Yamada) discovers his mother has been kidnapped, and he’s being forced to participate in a race called Live. He soon finds others who are also competing, all with a kidnapped loved one. They rulebook gives clues, but the biggest clue that something is wrong is all the people trying to kill them. As contestants fall, Naoto must figure out a way to save his mom, and possibly his friend and that hot girl who are also in the race.

Live is based on the book Live by Yusuke Yamada. It’s due in Japanese theaters on May 10th, and will presumably show up in American festivals soon enough. Yes, Asami Sugiura will be in it. I didn’t notice any of the other Iguchi regulars, but I’m betting they’ll pop up as well. Live also stars Ito Ono and Yuki Morinaga

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via Asianwiki

Live movie Noboru Iguchi

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Posted by Tars Tarkas -  at 12:09 am

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Asteroid vs. Earth in Asylum’s latest scifi thriller!

If you aren’t thrilled by asteroids threatening the planet, then feel free to skip on by, because those of us who are won’t want to miss a thing about the new film Asteroid vs. Earth!

When a shower of massive meteors threatens Earth’s inhabitants with extinction, the world’s greatest minds devise a dangerous plan that will tilt the planet off its axis to avoid the impact.

Yes, you read that right. Instead of going to the asteroid and blowing it up, they’re going to TILT THE FREAKING EARTH! This is some hardcore crazy outside the box thinking, and I’m pretty sure this hasn’t been done before. Tia Carrere stars, along with Robert Davi, Jason Brooks, and Tukov himself, Tim Russ. Christopher Ray (2-Headed Shark Attack) directs, and Adam Lipsius writes (this is his first feature) How are they going to move the Earth? I don’t know, but I hope it involves really big skateboards.

The Asteroid vs Earth Blu-ray is available on Amazon(affiliate link) It hits the street on April 29th!

The real question is who would win in a four-way matchup, Asteroid vs Earth vs Airlane vs Volcano? A question that will haunt us, until we remember that Sharknado would destroy them all!

via Asylum
Asteroid vs Earth

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Posted by Tars Tarkas - April 17, 2014 at 2:44 pm

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