Deadly Dolls 少女は異世界で戦った Rina Takeda

Rina Takeda kicks more evil dudes in Danger Dolls (少女は異世界で戦った)

Deadly Dolls 少女は異世界で戦った Rina Takeda

Rina Takeda has been pumping out films far faster than I can keep up, and Danger Dolls (少女は異世界で戦ったShôjo wa isekai de tatakatta) has slipped through the cracks. The title translates to Young Girls Battle in the Parallel World, which is why we’re getting the far more marketable (but dumb) Danger Dolls title for international release.

Four young women are super-heroines who disguise themselves as pop idols and battle evil businessmen from a parallel dimension that want to unleash guns and nuclear weapons unto their world. So basically it’s a simplified version of They Live, except parallel Republican Earth instead of Republican aliens.

Rina Takeda stars alongside Rumi Hanai, Nana Seino, and Kayano as the fearsome foursome. Shusuke Kaneko (Gamera Trilogy, Death Note, Azumi, Godzilla, Mothra and King Ghidorah: Giant Monsters All-Out Attack) directs, I’ve seen more of his films than I’ve thought, but he’s still creating several more each year. That means I might never catch up!

Unfortunately the film doesn’t appear to be very good. KungFuCinema forum member Takuma, who says “The climax is so cliched and illogical that it pretty much hurts brains.” They’ve not even put up a trailer yet, despite the film having a festival premiere, so someone in marketing needs to be fired… Heck, there is more information about Deadly Dolls in this post than their is on the official site!

Until Deadly Dolls gets a release in the US, remember to kick evil wherever you find it!

via KungFuCinema
via

Sharknado pop vinyl

Sharknado 3 and Sharknado vinyl!

Sharknado pop vinyl

Sharknado Sharknado Sharknado! Yes, it’s true, the SyFy disasterpiece Sharknado will be a trilogy, Asylum has confirmed it. That’s about all they confirmed this far out, expect it to air summer 2015 on SyFy. No word on if that will be the only original movie on SyFy in 2015, as 2014 is turning out to be a drought year for creature features. Other companies need to get into the monsters in tornadoes genre if they want any hope of being on television. (Actually, please don’t do that, other companies!)

Sharknado 2 airs July 31, 2014 on SyFy.

If you like vinyl figures and Sharknadoes, then you will love the Sharknado vinyl from Funko/Pop! Vinyl, which comes out in June.

Via Adweek

Lifetime The Good Sister

Sexy evil twin causes chaos for The Good Sister on Lifetime!

Lifetime The Good Sister

Wait, am I the good sister or the bad sister? I’ll just shoot everyone else, just to be sure!


With The Good Sister, Lifetime lets us know that our fiercest enemies might just be our long-lost identical twin sisters, who are of course sexy and evil and after your husbands. So you know blood is going to be shed trying to keep the dopey hubby who likes to nail his estranged wife’s identical twin. Can’t you just drop that zero and find a hero like any respectable cuckold twin? Anyway, I’m hoping the husband winds up buried in several jars scattered across sixteen states, but that’s just me.

The Plot:

Jack and Kate are a couple working hard to put the pieces of their crumbling marriage back together. When Kate receives a letter informing her of a long lost twin sister named Linda, she is very hesitant. But Jack is hopeful this new family member will help bring the couple closer together. As he attempts to reunite the sisters, he reluctantly finds himself drawn to Linda – a vivacious, sexier version of his own wife. It’s a pull he can’t ignore and before long the two are embroiled in a passionate affair. But Jack will quickly discover the choice isn’t between two sisters, it’s between life and death as his affair with Linda proves to be much more treacherous than he could have ever imagined.

Never marry a guy named Jack, especially if you have a long lost twin sister named Linda. Had Jack not drowned in Titanic, he would have been dating Rose’s twin Linda within weeks.

The Good Sister stars Sonya Walger(Lost), Ben Bass(Rookie Blue), and Bobbie Phillips(Chameleon, Chameleon II: Death Match, Chameleon 3: Dark Angel)

Director Philippe Gagnon has helmed prior thrillers like one entitled Willed to Kill, which is a hilarious name. Writer Pablo F. Fenjves wrote Man on a Ledge.

The Good Sister premieres May 10th on Lifetime!

Via Lifetime

star wars 7 cast

Let’s have Very Strong Opinons on the new Star Wars cast!

star wars 7 cast

Which one plays Lumpy???


GRRR! The cast of the new Star Wars film has been announced:

Actors John Boyega, Daisy Ridley, Adam Driver, Oscar Isaac, Andy Serkis, Domhnall Gleeson, and Max von Sydow will join the original stars of the saga, Harrison Ford, Carrie Fisher, Mark Hamill, Anthony Daniels, Peter Mayhew, and Kenny Baker in the new film.

Which means it’s time to write a bajillion “thinkpieces” about how this cast is great and I’ve totally heard of all these actors, especially the ones who haven’t been in anything, but also the cast sucks donkey balls because it’s not the dream team or diverse cast I wanted. Where’s my American Indian Jedi at?

Now, I’m not saying there aren’t a few immediate problems with this cast. There’s only one female listed in the new crew, and one black guy. But the most important thing is we know nothing about who they are playing or the plot, so all these new people could just be cameo roles in favor of the old school crew, they could be the new stars who the film will lean heavily on, or they could be the younger versions of characters different actors will play later. Anyone could be the villain (Driver was long rumored) or villains, Serkis is probably a whole pack of weird CGI things, and someone might even be gay! (but probably not…)

Still, it would be cool to have two ladies and not just Daisy Ridley. It would be cool to have two black guys and not just John Boyega (where the heck is Lando???) It would be cool if this film was already made so we could be spared two years of articles that make this article look like a shining example of genius. Let the plot rumors and angry nerd screeds swirl around, I’ll be dodging them with my Jedi skills and wait for either something official, or something from the few people who give accurate spoilers despite Abrams’ mystery box.

It does stand to reason that either Boyega or Ridley will be the main stars among the younger crew (their names are listed first for some reason…) Which means the leads of a big budget blockbuster will either be a black guy who isn’t Will Smith (or his kid) or a woman. Or both. Sadly, that’s better than a huge chunk of blockbuster films.

As regular readers of TarsTarkas.NET know, we don’t jump into the casting rumor hype game that often. Partially because for many films there is a new rumor every day (that’s then debunked within hours), and partially because if I’m going to fish for pageviews, I’d like to write about what I want to write about, and not chase the latest pre-debunked rumor that Johnny Depp is rumored to play Jabba’s Butt in Star Wars 9. Which he would be terrible at! But we’re making an exception here because it’s Star Wars and I like doing sort of meta-topics that turn out to be less meta than I hoped when they’re all done. It’s either that, or join the new cottage industry of writing articles about just who in the heck Daisy Ridley is!

So that’s it for now, stay tuned for the next time a major news event happens when I have free time during lunch and can write a bit! If you have some Very Strong Opinions, feel free to share them below, that’s what the internet is for!

Also Lawrence Kasdan is in that photo, which is awesome.

via Star Wars

A Daughter's Nightmare Lifetime

A Daughter’s Nightmare is more Lifetime Movie fun! #DaughtersNightmare

A Daughter's Nightmare Lifetime

How am I still being Cyberbu//ied, it’s been years! Good thing I still can’t get the cap off…


Lifetime is the world expert on nightmares (suck on that, Freddy Krueger!) and their latest original movie, A Daughter’s Nightmare, is another fine example of nightmares and evil evil men.

Soon after her father’s death, college freshman Ariel learns her mother, Dana, has met Adam, a seemingly well-meaning and charming man at a grief support group. He claims to be a nurse, but the longer he hangs around the sicker and more isolated Dana becomes, even from Ariel. When Dana suddenly goes missing it’s up to Ariel to discover the terrible truth of Adam’s past before it is too late.

A Daughter’s Nightmare stars Emily Osment(Hannah Montana and Cyberbu//y), Gregg Sulkin(Wizards of Waverly Place), Paul Johansson(One Tree Hill), Victoria Pratt(Cleopatra 2525), and RICHARD KARN!!!! Yes, Al Borland himself! This might be one of the best casts in a ridiculous Lifetime film yet!

Director Vic Sarlin has previously worked on A Sister’s Nightmare and A Mother’s Nightmare, both of which were also written by Shelley Gillen, who writes this entry. I guess makes this another Lifetime Franchise! Shocking how many we’ve come across.

A Daughter’s Nightmare premieres Saturday, May 3rd on Lifetime! Their hashtag for talking on Twitter is #DaughtersNightmare. Several prior films have trended nationally, let’s see if this one does as well…

via Lifetime

Zone Fighter 21 無敵! ゴジラ大暴れ

Zone Fighter Episode 21 – Muteki! Gojira Ooabare

Zone Fighter Episode 21 – Muteki! Gojira Ooabare

aka 無敵! ゴジラ大暴れ aka Invincible! Godzilla’s Violent Charge! aka Invincible! Godzilla Rages
Zone Fighter 21 無敵! ゴジラ大暴れ
1973
Written by Shinichi Kanzawa
Directed by Kohei Oguri

March of Godzilla 2014

This is how we do!

Godzilla! Godzilla’s back! Hooray! Godzilla will save us from tedious Zone Fighter, at least he should, because he’s the whole freaking reason I’m watching this show! In fact, this episode isn’t that bad. It’s significantly creepy, featuring the Garoga doing some pretty horrible things. It also introduces a whole new perspective on the Garoga that presents a universe of trouble and possibilities.

We find out this episode Godzilla lives in a cave. Not just any cave, it’s a cave with an automatic split-open door, and it’s in the middle of an abandoned rocky terrained area just minutes from downtown Tokyo. Geographic craziness aside, the main question is, who built Godzilla’s home? Because I doubt it was Godzilla stomping around with carpenter’s tools. Maybe Godzilla got all his sons together and had them construct a house. But then we don’t see those sons, so maybe not. Godzilla is a minimalist, because it’s not decorated, and Godzilla just sits in the center of the cavern. Probably meditating, maybe composing music in his head, or reviewing and analyzing past battle victories in his mind. You know, kaiju thoughts. Godzilla keeps in practice by sparring with Zone Fighter, probably because he misses his friend, Jet Jaguar. Come visit, Jet!

Zone Fighter 21 無敵! ゴジラ大暴れ

Can’t a Godzilla watch the National Cheerleading Championships in peace without Zone Fighter begging for help?


This episode rules for several reasons. One is that Godzilla is in it. Another is that the Garoga totally gun down a whole lot of people in this episode. They kidnap Akira, and the hostage trade with the Zone Family actually feels dangerous. This is the episode where the Garoga most feel like an actual threat and not a bunch of goofy idiots in masks and costumes. There are only a few random points in other episodes where the Garoga are threatening, here they are mean for almost the entire run. It ads to the enjoyment of the series immensely to see the villains being so destructively evil. Something they should have done more of.

The monster in this episode is Jellar, who is a space blob found on a distant planet. The monster is also Kastom-Jellar, who grows from a part of Jellar that’s ripped off by Godzilla. Yes, this means there are two monsters. Double your pleasure, double your fun. Jellar and Kastom-Jellar are different enough to tell apart despite their origin as from the same being. Neither of which have what it takes to defeat Godzilla and Zone Fighter working together, despite Zone Fighter’s best efforts to fail.

Zone Fighter 21 無敵! ゴジラ大暴れ

Guest director: Teruo Ishii


Jellar is brought to the Garoga at Earth by other Garoga. Specifically, it’s presented to Baron Garoga, who up until this point seemed to be the leader of all Garoga, by White Garoga, who appears to be equal in rank to him. This means that there is a whole hierarchy of a Garoga Empire beyond the group that is garrisoned at Earth. The Garoga are more than just a bunch of thugs in a space station, they are a galactic empire with far reaching grasp, and the defeat of the group at Earth would just lead to more showing up. The entire series is only a tiny drop in the bucket, whatever victories Zone Fighter achieves are minor, and at some point the Garoga might just declare not worth the budget sinkhole and blow it up. They’ve sent comets to crash into Earth before, they might already be mad at the costs of a fruitless invasion. Heck, the Garoga might have other planets with other heroes that are stopping their advances. The point is we don’t know, because their is so much mystery about what is happening. And the worst thing is the series ends before the Garoga are defeated, so whatever gains are done, the evil is still out there, until it’s eventually retconned when the series is rebooted at some point in the future. If that ever happens…

But enough about futures and things, it’s all about the here and now, and we must go watch Godzilla and Zone Fighter battle some alien space goo, Garoga kidnap Akira, innocent people get gunned down, and subtextual soccer fantasies. If you need a Zone Fighter refresher, check out the Zone Fighter Splash Page!

Zone Fighter 21 無敵! ゴジラ大暴れ

The monster is convinced Zone Fighter is a schoolgirl!