Do you want Search?
Random Post
Random Post
Search
  • Home
  • Tag Archives:  Women who kick butt
Search
InMovie Reviews, Ugly

Robogeisha (Review)

February 5, 2011By

RoboGeisha


2009
Written and Directed by Noboru Iguchi

Robogeisha is exactly what you would expect from a movie with that title. Needless to say, that means it gets approval here on TarsTarkas.NET. We got geisha, robots, robot geisha, dudes getting killed by geisha, women with various weapons built into their body, fake blood spraying everywhere, and women kicking butt.


Now, Robogeisha sounds like the kind of film that doesn’t have some sort of commentary on culture of Japan or the world, and you would be right to think so, except for the fact that you are wrong. The thing is, Robogeisha is unaware that is has such comments, so we’re really grasping at straws here. Giant, obvious straws.


The plot sort of follows the basic lines of Memoirs of a Geisha for a few minutes before veering off into insane territory. But we have the similarities with the sisters being rivals (substituting the Sayuri/Pumpkin rivalry) and the steel industry tycoon. I’m not saying Memoirs of a Geisha would have been a better film had it had robot geisha fighting a walking building, but it probably would have.


But first the cast…

Yoshie Kagusa (Aya Kiguchi) – Yoshie is just your average sister of a geisha who has supressed rage powers to kill kill kill. There seems to be a girl named Yoshie in almost every Noboru Iguchi film. Weird. Aya Kiguchi is a gravure model/actress, and we set up a gallery post as those are always popular.
Kikue Kagusa (Hitomi Hasebe) – Yoshie’s older, graceful, prettier, spoiled sister. Because jealous when her sister is a better killer than her, so endeavors to once again be the best and get all the attention.
Hikaru Kageno (Takumi Saito) – The long haired Hikaru Kageno is the president of Kageno Steel along with his father, and is the object of desire of the two Kagusa sisters. He also works with his father in a horrible plan to kidnap and brainwash women into killers, and eventually blow up a volcano. Takumi Saito was also in Vampire Girl vs. Frankenstein Girl.
Onna Tengu 1 (Asami Sugiura as Asami) – One of the two masked Tengu henchwomen who do the bidding of the Kagenos. Onna Tengu 1 was previously a girl named Yasuko before she was brainwashed. Asami is an AV actress who also appears in a lot of ultragore films, such as The Machine Girl and Mutant Girls Squad.
Onna Tengu 2 (Cay Izumi) – Cay Izumi is a choreographer, model, actress, and pole dancer and the leader of the gothic lolita ensemble performance team Tokyo DOLORES. And yes, they figure out a way to get her on a pole briefly during a fight sequence. Cay Izumi pops up as well in Mutant Girls Squad, Tokyo Gore Police, and was a Ganguro Girl in Vampire Girl vs. Frankenstein Girl.
RoboCastle (???) – He’s a castle, he’s a robot! He’s both these things, and he keeps his samurai armor sensibility!

InMovie Reviews, Ugly

The Vanquisher (Review)

December 25, 2010By

The Vanquisher

aka Suay…Samurai aka Final Target

2009
Directed and written by Manop Udomdej

The Vanquisher starts out confusing and just gets more and more incoherent until you give up and go back to that one thing…what’s it called…reading! So just read this instead of watching The Vanquisher. Director (and writer) Manop Udomdej has graced TarsTarkas.NET before with his film Lizard Woman, and a few of the stars from that one make their way into this film. Sadly, the gecko women are not going to pop up and bit random characters. The Thai title Suay … Samurai translates to “Beautiful Samurai”. Because when you think “Samurai”, you think of hot Thai women.

HELP! The slow-motion rain burns!

The Vanquisher‘s troubles began before the film was even edited, when an actress in the film named “Amy” Chotiros Suriwong wore a dress at the 2007 Thailand National Film Awards that was so revealing that the entire nation of Thailand went insane. People couldn’t stop talking about how they were shocked, shocked that women had breasts. The government was overthrown 17 times, riots filled the streets, and Tony Jaa became a monk. So executive producer Somsak Techaratanaprasert chopped her out of the film, despite the fact this film is based on the premise that you will be staring at the breasts of the actresses in it.

It was obvious that this film was made with foreign distribution in mind. The film is mixed with English, Japanese, and a smattering of Thai. Why they bothered, I am not certain, as the English is so awful I can’t believe it was actually written and spoken by anyone who has heard English before. The sentence structure was beyond awkward, and even what I could pick up on seemed to be random statements. I needed the subtitles just to understand what was being said, unfortunately that was no help as the subtitles were autotranslated from either Thai or Chinese and were nothing more than broken sentence fragments. At least until halfway through the flick, when they just gave up entirely on having subtitles. As I have said before at TarsTarkas.NET, we don’t need no stinking subtitles. So I made up a story about how all those chicks were lesbians and it suddenly got far more interesting. You would think the white actors who are obvious native English speakers would at least be understandable, but you would be wrong. They must have had no input on the script as to writing sentences that people would actually say, or they don’t care and were just looking for a payday. Payday may be an awesome candy bar, but it made an awful time understanding the film.

I’ll take Psycho Women for $800, Alex

Genja (Sophita Sribanchean aka Sophita Sriban) – Genja is a cop who helps the CIA and gets almost killed for it. Then it is time for revenge! This is Sophita Sribanchean’s first film.
Sirin (“Nui” Kessarin Ektawatkul) – The Thai spy agency/CIA’s lead fighter, as well as non-insane female Nui Kessarin is a former national champion in tae kwon do and was in Born to Fight and Dangerous Flowers
Clare (Jacqueline Apithananont aka Jacqui A. Thananon) – Clare is the crazy as heck CIA lady who is in charge of the Vanquisher project, and is charged will killing all them ladies. She missed one, thus the film has sort of a plot. Jacqueline Apithananont was also in Queens of Langkasuka and The Bodyguard 2.
Mazaru (Pete Thongchua) – Mazaru is some sort of bad guy who is in charge of some ninjas, and is permanently having a scowl on his face. Pete Thongchua was in Lizard Woman.
Hana (Saito Kano) – A Yakuza chick who somehow is wandering around and has a sword. Saito Kana was also in Lizard Woman, as one of the women who take a shower and are then geckoed the frak up.
That’s sexual harassment. And I don’t have to take it!
InBad, Movie Reviews

Revenge of Lady Fighter (Review)

December 5, 2010By

Revenge of Lady Fighter

aka Buhawi

1973
Directed by Junar – aka Jun Aristorenas
Written by Greg B. Macabenta

“Only a hurricane can freeze the fury of her fist!”

Revenge of Lady Fighter is really well done once the fight sequences get going. In fact, the fight scenes and quality are so good the film actually made me angry. Not at the film, but because the team behind Revenge of Lady Fighter was also the team behind Batwoman and Robin and Batwoman and Robin Meet the Queen of the Vampires, two films considered holy grail lost films of Filipino cinema (though Tony Cayado directed Meet the Queen of the Vampires). Before watching Lady Fighter, I assumed these would be dumb comedies with little to no action sequences, along the lines of Alyas Batman en Robin. Instead, now I am picturing them as a fun-filled action romps, making the fact I will probably never see them stinging even more.

Director Jun Aristorenas was born Juanito Aristorenas in 1933 in the Philippines. By the late 1950s he was a regular on the Filipino vaudeville circuit (known as Bodabil), which lead to a few walk-on roles in films. By 1965, he was a headliner, starring in flicks such as Dugong Tigre. In 1967, he started his own production company – Junar Productions – Junar being his nickname and the name he is credited as director of this flick.

Jun Aristorenas was nominated as best actor for his performance in Elias, Basilio at Sisa (1972) by the Film Academy of Movie Arts & Sciences (FAMAS). His 1970 film Dimasalang scored him the Rajah Soliman award for Best Director at the 1970 Manila Film Festival. He became a regular in western films such as Johnny West (1966) and Dimasalang, but also starred in other action genres such as war or even samurai films like Samurai Master (1969) and The Samurai Fighters (1969). Cult movie fans might recognize him from She Devils in Chains (1976) Jun Aristorenas continued to act in films up to his death in 2000, his last appearance being 2000’s Pag Oras Mo, Oras Mo Na.

Aristorenas married female action star Virginia (aka Virginia Gaerlan then Virginia Aristorenas) who then starred in several of his films. By the 1970s, Virginia had assumed the mantle of the Action Queen of Filipino Cinema, the successor of 1950’s action queen Celia Fuentes. Virginia debuted in 1971’s Ang Mababangis and started out doing dangerous stunts from the start. She appeared in films such as Bandolera (1972), Apat na Bagwis (1972) – “Three men and a woman, undercover agents, blast the hell out of Devil’s Island”, Kumander Erlinda (1972), and The Panther (1973). Two of their sons, Robin and Junar, also appeared in some of the films. In fact, Robin Aristorenas played Robin in Batwoman and Robin and Batwoman and Robin Meet the Queen of the Vampires along with a long career as a child actor. Virginia has passed on, but I have been unable to find out when and why.

Lady Fighter suffers from being a film of the 1970s and thus has some of the flaws of the era, including long drawn out scenes that would be cut much tighter now. Is someone walking up to a village? Well, we’re gonna see every single step he takes. Yay!!! Uh…

Rosa (Virginia aka Virginia Aristorenas) – Rosa is quested by Ming to retrieve the medallions he gave the townspeople who are now using his martial arts knowledge for evil instead of good. She has to learn kung fu all by herself and then beat up everyone since the few cops are all useless.
Ming (Ernie Ortega) – Ming is a local kung fu master who is a legend, which we know because we’re told so. He teaches the town kung fu on the condition they will use it honorably, but once the genie is out of the bottle the townspeople smash that bottle over the heads of the villains and kill them all. Ming is ticked off, but even more ticked off when he is killed.
Nardo (Rolando Gonzalez) – The local bad guy of the town, who becomes the big bad guy once he gets the taste of karate power. Rolando Gonzalez was the Karate King of Philippine Movies. The son of Latino Gonzalez, known as the Father of Philippine Karate. Gonzalez starred in a string of action films in the 60s and 70s, but near the end of his life was broke and begging his old acting buddies for money. He died in 2009.
Lewel (Fred Galang) – Lewel is the only non-comic relief guy in town who isn’t a murderous drunk. Depending on who dubbed what part, the guy’s name is either Lewel or Noel. Fred Galang was a much lauded actor in the 1960s and 70s. A biography of Fred Galang I found that looks auto-translated mentioned that at one point he joined “occult, ESP mind power and drugs”. Eventually he became a born again minister.
Curian (Palito) – Curian might be named Rulen, depending on whoever wrote up the dubbing script that week. We’re going with Curian because that is the one used more. He’s one of the comic relief guys and helps Rosa train for her mission. Palito translates to stick, and he was a hard-working comedian who was making films until 2007, enduring the ups and downs of the Pinoy film industry. Notable films include Darna at Ding, BoboCop, James Bone, and Sheman: Mistress of the Universe. He died in 2010.
Other Comic Relief (Teroy de Guzman) – The other comic relief guy doesn’t even get a name! He manages to get a medallion and joins the bad guys as they go off to form a gang due to being forced to go with them. At the end, Other Comic Relief helps rescue his buddy Curian. A Bodabil alumni, Teroy was a member of the famous singing and dancing group Crazy Corporation with Panchito, Ading Fernando and Bayani Casismiro. He was also part of the dancing trio The 3 Hot Shots with fellow comedians Dolphy and Rene Pangan in the 1950s. He continued to work through the early 1980s in TV and the best estimates for his death is sometime in the 1990s.

InMovie Reviews, Ugly

Sukeban Fighter Misaki (Review)

May 18, 2010By

Sukeban Fighter Misaki


2006
Directed by Masayoshi Shiki
Sukeban Fighter Misaki

So this entry will require a bit of background, because Japan is weird. As you are probably aware of as you are an avid reader of TarsTarkas.NET and similar site that regularly go over the massive volume of cinema to be released from Japan. The vast majority of these films are low-budget direct to video affairs produced for a very limited audience. Thus, the videos usually cost close to $50 when first dropped, though they’ll soon end up as bargain basement packages as the parade of young actresses featured in the films rotates onwards. Many of the films are targeted at those who love low-budget action/crime/blood/gore films, and some of the select audiences are those who subscribe to specific fetishes. These range from harmless affairs like costumed chicks or fighting chicks, to more screwed up stuff that requires liberal use of the censor mosaic. As we like to pretend that we have a PG-13 rating here on TarsTarkas.NET, Sukeban Fighter Misaki falls strictly into the Fighting Schoolgirl genre. These affairs are basically involving tough schoolgirl fighters, secret agency people, evil masterminds, at least one evil schoolgirl, and a bunch of dudes in masks who will harass and capture the schoolgirl fighters.
Sukeban Fighter Misaki

Sukeban Fighter Misaki looks like it is one of a set of four films that were all made at the same time. Without having seen the other three, I am not sure what order they are intended to be watched in. The other three films are Sukeban Fighter Ayaka, Sukeban Fighter 2nd Intrigue, and Sukeban Fighter 2nd Struggle. I think it is produced by Zen Pictures, which is a production company that specializes in costume fighting women films. Their company website has literally hundreds of Power Rangers-ish films. They also have a sister company that does lots of horror stuff called Babel (the films are oddly called “New challenge movies”) You can also get a job doing voiceover work in the films for English dubs.

Sukeban Fighter Misaki

Misaki (Megumi Yamanaka) – Megumi Yamanaka was a gravure model that seemed to be in a lot of stuff circa 2006. Looks like she’s also in 2004’s New Zero Woman.
Ayaka (Kazuma Kawabata) – The student council president who works with some teachers to try to control the gang problem. The solution is to get Misaki to beat up all the gang. There is no info about Kazuma Kawabata anywhere and she seems to dropped off the face of the internet after these films.
Evil Girl (Eriko Matsumura) – Evil Girl is evil, hence her name. Also I didn’t catch her name, hence her name. She works for the evil boss and is evil. That’s all you need to know. Eriko Matsumura also dropped off the face of the internet after these films. I imagine she and Kazuma Kawabata are living in a shack somewhere in the desert, lifelong lovers, raising camels. Because…why not?

Sukeban Fighter Misaki

InMovie Reviews, Ugly

Midnight Angel (Review)

April 21, 2010By

Midnight Angel

aka Ng ye tin si

1990
Directed by Jonathan Chik Gei-Yee
Written by Abe Kwong Man-Wai
Midnight Angel

Masked female crimefighters used to populate Cantonese cinema like the buffalo used to inhabit the Great Plains. Then all the buffalo got shot, and all the female crimefighters stopped being popular after the Shaw Brothers helped eclipse Cantonese cinema. But in the late 1980s, Cantonese cinema came roaring back and by the early 90s, there were lots of action films being pumped out. So it only makes sense that there would suddenly be a masked female crimefighter film in the middle of the action fest, as the buffalo have come back. Sure, this analogy is a stretch, but just go with it!
Midnight Angel

Like many Hong Kong films from the 1990s, Midnight Angel has a billion titles, including Justice Women, Wu ye tian shi, Ng ye tin si, and The Legend of Heroism.

Midnight Angel

Our copy is an exciting VHS dub, complete with extra darkness and soft images. So don’t complain about the quality, because I’ll just ignore those complaints as that’s how we roll at TarsTarkas.NET.
Midnight Angel

Ying (Yukari Oshima) – The oldest of three sisters and a cop. Her boyfriend Tak is also a cop, except he gets killed dead by bad dudes. Until it turns out he isn’t, then he is really killed dead. Yukari Oshima can be seen on TarsTarkas.NET in such films as Angel’s Mission, Deadly Target, and Godfather’s Daughter.
Cherry (Angile Leung Wan-Yui) – The middle sister and also a cop. The last of the sisters to become a masked vigilante. Angile Leung was in The Isle of Fantasy, which was my wife’s favorite film back in the day.
Jee aka Rabbit (May Lo Mei-Mei) – The youngest of the three sisters and the only one who is not a cop. Either because she is too young or because she too much of an independent spirit to be a cop. In any event, she instead becomes a costumed vigilante named Cotton Flower.
Grandpa (Shek Kin) – Grandfather who adopted three girls. I am not sure how that makes him Grandpa, but just go with it. Back in the day he was the original Cotton Flower, a secret he shared with only his best friend until his daughters start taking up his legacy. Shek Kin is also on TarsTarkas.NET in How the Ape Girl Stole the Lotus Lamp, The Furious Buddha’s Palm, and Lady Black Cat.
Police chief (Ng Man-Tat) – The chief of police who is getting orders from on high not to go after the gang causing trouble, though he can’t say why. Only notable because he’s Ng Man-Tat.
Inspector Chao (Walter Tso Tat-Wah) – A police inspector who failed to catch the original Cotton Flower, so he vows to catch this new on to regain his honor. Because masked vigilantes stopping wifebeaters is more important than the giant gang also in the city that is offing cops left and right. Walter Tso is also on TarsTarkas.NET in The Furious Buddha’s Palm, and How the Ape Girl Stole the Lotus Lamp.

Midnight Angel

InMovie Reviews, Ugly

Raging Phoenix (Review)

April 6, 2010By


Raging Phoenix

aka Jija Deu Suay Du

2009
Directed by Rashane Limtrakul

Raging Phoenix is film a mix of romance and action, which garnered many reviews that weren’t that positive, largely due to disappointment it wasn’t another non-stop action film. I feel that there was plenty of action and am not really sure what all the complaints are about. I suspect it is more due to the length of time between action sequences making the film seem longer than it is.

Basically, people are complaining because this film has a plot longer than one sentence!

Now, a plot is not a bad thing, but the plot here has character arcs and an underlying plot that factors into the finale. It is constructed just fine, and try as I might I just can’t see why this was given such a harsh response. It wasn’t Chocolate 2 and it didn’t try to be, and it is unfair to expect it to be when it is screaming at you that it isn’t.

But it was too late, the bad reviews sunk in and it failed to reach No. 1 at the Thai box office on its opening weekend, losing out to G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra which was in its second week. Sure, people still don’t like this film for a variety of reasons, but as I am not one of them I can’t speak as to specifics beyond the general tone of the film.

Raging Phoenix is known in Thailand as Jija Deu Suay Du, which means Jija: Stubborn, Beautiful and Fierce. As Jija’s character is named Deu, that means her character name is Stubborn. This role is a change of direction for Jija, as it involving acting beyond playing someone with emotional issues. She had to actually become a real person, which I think she pulled off rather well.

The director, co-writer and co-editor was Rashane Limtrakul, who had his debut film in 1995 (Romantic Blue) and then directed nothing until this 2009 feature. That’s about all I know about him.

This is probably the only film you have seen featuring mayraiyuth, the drunken Thai martial art. Unless you are a big fan of drunken Thai martial arts movies, in which case you would have seen more than this one and made my statement false. How dare you, sir!

But enough of the rantin’, let’s get to the reviewin’!

First up is the Roll Call, because we can’t have a review without it due to my deep mental issues of wanting formatting that makes the reviews take ten times longer than they should!

Deu (“Jija” Yanin Wismistananda) – a drummer chick, abandoned by her parents as a child and eventually abandoned by her band and boyfriend. Her drunken haze after drinking off her abandonment issues ends up getting her kidnapped, but she is rescued by Sanim. Eventually, Sanim and his boys train her in mayraiyuth, the drunken Thai martial art, and starts becoming a rescuer of kidnapped girls. And is in love with Sanim, even though he only has eyes for his kidnapped fiancée.
Sanim (Patrick “Kazu” Tang) – a strong, mostly-silent type who hangs out with a couple of other guys rescuing girls. Looking for his abducted bride Mye. Deu falls for him, but he is focused on his lost love. Sanim is played by French-Vietnamese martial artist “Kazu” Patrick Tang.
Kee Moo (Nui “B Boy Mr. 60 Rock” Sandang) – The Mohawked member of the rescue gang. Helps to train Deu when she first joins up. Kee Moo means pig dung.
Kee Ma (Sompong “B Boy Haste” Leartvimolkasame) – The long-haired member of the rescue gang who is good pals with Kee Moo. Kee Ma means dog dung.
Kee Kwai (Boonprasert “B Boy Dman” Salangam) – The enigmatic dreadlocked member of the gang who is usually out doing stuff. Kee Kwai means buffalo dung, so we got the three dung brothers. And by now you should have a pretty heavy vocabulary in Thai.
Jaguar London (Roongtawan “Sing” Jindasing) – Jaguar’s chief enforcer, played by the female bodybuilder Roongtawan Jindasing. She has won more body building competitions than you can shake a stick at, you girly man! No offense to our actual lone female reader. You can see her official website here.
Jaguar Tokyo (Hoang Nghi) – a Scarred Jet Li-looking guy who is part of the Jaguar gang and steals women. What a nice guy!
Jaguar Bombay (David Bueno) – A red hair guy whose hair looks brighter thanks to the filters used in the film. He’s a member of the Jaguar gang and steals women. Another nice guy!

Older 
34567
 Newer