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Liz & Dick trailer

Lindsay Lohan took a break from getting arrested and being difficult to work with to film Liz & Dick, though she was reportedly difficult to work with and has just now been arrested once again, the perfect publicity under which to debut the trailer for the Lifetime original movie that is totally no a completely tasteless cash grab to capitalize on the death of Elizabeth Taylor. The poster that attempts to tie Liz Taylor’s life to Lindsay Lohan’s is evidence to that. Just kidding, even a dream team of Matlock and Perry Mason couldn’t get you off with this evidence against you! Grant Bowler plays the Dick in the title, Richard Burton. November is when this hits the airwaves, place your bets now if Lohan will be in jail, rehab, or the grave by then.

Liz and Dick

Will Cyberstalker on Lifetime be spectacular or craptacular?

Cyberstalker Lifetime

Movies about the internet and how awful it is are either really hilarious, or really really hilarious. But there is the odd off chance that Lifetime Movie Network’s Cyberstalker will be good. Maybe. But for now, we’re going to assume that Cyberstalker will be of the same wonderful quality of the other made for TV cyber films, Cyber Seduction and cyberbu//y. I guess the final answer will be when it airs this weekend. Don’t miss it, unless you are one of those people who doesn’t watch garbage. You snob!
Starring: Mischa Barton, Dan Levy, Ron Lea

Thirteen years ago, Aiden’s world was torn apart after an online stalker followed her into the real world and broke into her home to claim the object of his desire. The resulting night of terror ended with the murders of both Aiden s mother and father. The stalker escaped the scene without Aiden seeing his face; he is gone without a trace, an unknown man, a murderer now watching Aiden s every move. To escape this danger Aiden spends the next 13 years offline, in therapy and secluded anonymity. Who should Aiden trust in a web of deception where no one may be who they seem? There is nowhere for Aiden to hide when someone wants to love her to death.

Who could the cyberstalker be? I wonder…

Rob Lowe is Untouchable, Bitch!

Coming to Lifetime, the most evil MAN who ever MANNED, Drew Peterson, will be brought to life by Rob Lowe in the most ridiculous Lifetime movie trailer I’ve seen in years. Just FYI, Drew Peterson himself finds the trailer hilarious. Drew Peterson: Untouchable drops in January.

Rob Lowe Drew Peterson Untouchable Lifetime

Cyberseduction

Cyber Seduction: His Secret Life (Review)

Cyber Seduction: His Secret Life


2005
Starring
Jeremy Sumpter as Justin Petersen
Kelly Lynch as Diane Petersen
Lyndsy Fonseca as Amy
Jake Scott as Alex Petersen

Lifetime Networks presents a story of our times. From the tradition of Reefer Madness, Cocaine Fiends, and Sex Madness comes Cyber Seduction: His Secret Life, the story of a boy and his internet porn, and how it destroyed his life. Just like those movies, the effects of pornography is over the top, and our innocent kid soon becomes entangled in a world of horror. Also this movie uses the phrase “Virgin Vaginas” which is just too funny for words.

Up as the concerned mom Diane Petersen is Kelly Lynch, who gives us a lecture at the end of the movie about pornography. I wasn’t paying attention, as I used Google Image Search to look up “Kelly Lynch” and found a full frontal shot of her as the very first picture returned. Playing the innocent Justin is Peter Pan himself, Jeremy Sumpter. Looks like the boy who never grew up finally did, and he’s growing up in more places than one when the internet comes on if you catch my drift.