What in the ever-lovin’ blue eyed Thing crap is this? Someone at The Asylum either loves Edgar Rice Burroughs or really really hates Edgar Rice Burroughs (or at least figured out much of his work is public domain in the US) as besides the badly reviewed Land that Time Forgot adaptation, we’re getting a mockbuster of the upcoming John Carter of Mars movie with Princess of Mars. Now, we have a love-hate relationship with The Asylum here at TarsTarkas.NET. Transmorphers was awesome, Invasion of the Pod People was pretty good (and if I ever find my copy to make video clips off of I’ll up the review), but most of their good fare was directed by Leigh Scott, thus we get a uninspired entry with The Terminators and the Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus movie that needed more Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus. But at least they are trying for some higher-concept films. Now with Princess of Mars, they have the potential to make an okay version of the classic ERB stories, but I doubt that will happen as the movie stars Antonio Sabato, Jr. and Traci Lords. Traci Lords is going to be Dejah Thoris. I think my brain exploded. No word on who Tars Tarkas will be or if they will even try to have giant green four-armed monsters, or just some regular dudes in green makeup. Also no word on if everyone will be naked. All we got is this tiny plot description:
Based on the novel by Edgar Rice Burroughs,’ US soldier John Carter finds himself inexplicably transported to Mars in the midst of a war between two alien races.
So I guess he won’t be a former confederate officer. He’ll probably be a modern day guy because they should have one of those uniforms lying around. I shall be watching over this one, because, what the heck? See you on December 29th.