“We should rip off Road House and Billy Ray Cyrus should play Dalton!”
There are two types of people in this world: those who read the above sentence and immediately lapsed into fits of hysterical, table-pounding, pants-wetting laughter. And then the other .00001% of people, who thought “Sounds good to me! Is Michelle Pfeiffer’s sister available to play the love interest?”
We have that .00001% to thank for Radical Jack. Eight long years after “Achy Breaky Heart” came out, and approximately 7 years, 364 days, 23 hours, 59 minutes and 34 seconds after the first jukebox playing “Achy Breaky Heart” was smashed with a pool cue, American cinemas got the movie they needed. Except, minor detail, it was actually released direct to video in Russia.
Which makes a lot of sense once you see Radical Jack. Fans of Road House will recognize the key points: a loner with a mysterious past comes to town and finds employment at a local dive bar. A local arms dealer has grown rich running the town, despite the fact that its population appears to hover around 35 people. Occasionally Billy Ray takes breaks from doing construction to pour water all over himself in slow motion while seductive music plays1. The only thing missing is the Monster Truck. Once you see the budget on this thing, you’ll understand why they had to leave it out.
And Radical Jack doesn’t just rip off one of our all time favorite RiffTrax titles! Shot in Rutland, VT, it features the very time machine from Time Chasers itself!! (AKA, a crappy, weathered small airplane.) Join Mike, Kevin, and Bill for Radical Jack. Just don’t tell their lips, their fingertips, or various other body parts.
1 This never actually happened in the version of Road House that was shown in theaters, but it does in the one that airs on a loop in our hearts.
Sharknado 2: The Second One (Review)
Sharknado 2: The Second One
2014
Written by Thunder Levin
Directed by Anthony C. Ferrante
How can the same shark happen to the same guy twice?
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The Sharknadoes are back and this time they’re taking on the Big Apple! But New Yorkers aren’t going to just stand by and let their city get destroyed by a bunch of shark-laced tornadoes. Thus the people fight back, and more importantly, returning Sharknado hero Fin leads the fight against the sharknadoes. With Sharknado 2: The Second One, Asylum and SyFy step back into the world of viral creature feature movies, and score a monster hit. Not only was this the highest SyFy original movie ever (with 3.9 million viewers), but it’s also entertaining and fun. The action is bigger and more consistent throughout the whole film, leading to less of the pacing problem that the original Sharknado faced.
Sharknado 2 edges its predecessor with more ridiculous stunts and better graphics. The money shots are given a high quality look to better make cool gifs. The well-paced action provides continual entertainment, beginning with a ridiculously awesome plane sequence that just keeps raising the stakes and the body count. The excuses to get people moving around felt more genuine than Sharknado‘s goal post moving search for family. Sharknado 2 has what is the best excuse for not being able to reach someone by cell phone I’ve seen in a movie (the guy shuts it off so he can spend quality time with his son and not be distracted by work! So much better than random “out of service” shots or just ignoring phones altogether.)
Fin Shepard (Ian Ziering) and his ex-wife April Wexler (Tara Reid), who he is now reconciling with, are on route to New York City, his hometown and where his sister and her family live. But the flight path is right through the latest forming sharknado, and soon the plane is a disasterpiece that Fin has to land himself. Things become a desperate struggle to get his family to safety and to save the city from the sharknadoes, while chomping death flies in the skies and rains down on the people. Only chainsaws, buzzsaw hands, swords, guns, freon tanks, and a host of celebrity cameos can save New York City from nature’s wrath!