Dangerous Flowers

Dangerous Flowers (Review)

Dangerous Flowers

aka Chai lai

2006
Directed by Poj Arnon

Charlie’s Angels left a legacy of countless imitators. The original series spawned many copycats, and the recent movies also spawned copies. As the new movies decided to be action comedies, so did many of the copycat movies. And since the new movies decided to not be very good, the copycats decided to one-up them and be even worse! One of those copies is reviewed here today. The 2006 film from Thailand was originally entitled Chai Lais or Chai Lais Angels, and eventually became known as Dangerous Flowers. I wonder what the “Chai Lai” trying to sound like… Charlie’s Angels copies from Asia are vary common, we even reviewed Asian Charlie’s Angels a while back. We get five beautiful Thai women who fight crime, fail at their missions, and blow stuff up. The film begs you to not take it seriously, yet then throws in a few people getting killed violently just to screw with you.

The film has a few quirks in the subtitles, firstly they refer to the girls as “chai Lais”, notice how the first letter of chai is not capitalized. It never is, but the L in Lai is always capitalized. I don’t know what that means, but it probably means something stupid. So we’ll got with it for the entire review. Take that, bad subtitles!

We got five Angels, excuse me, FLOWERS, who we will just hit the Roll Call for now, as well as the peripheral characters. The film is forgettable, unexceptional, and nothing you haven’t seen before. Unless you are blind, in which case you probably aren’t reading this anyway. Or are you?

Kulap/Goolab CODENAME: Rose (Bongkoj Khongmalai) – chai Lai agent, the rich fashionable one. Is dating a guy named Gud, who is pretty good, good enough to become her fiancée. Affectionately known as Tuk, Bongkoj Khongmalai holds the number 10 spot as FHM Thailand’s sexiest lady. She starred in Tom Yum Goong and was embroiled in a naked picture scandal which wasn’t that big of a deal as the actual nudes weren’t released so don’t waste your Google time.
Bua CODENAME: Lotus (Supaksorn Chaimongkol) – Supaksorn Chaimongkol is nicknamed Kratae (which means chipmunk – are there even chipmunks in Thailand?) Voted number 11 on FHM Thailand’s sexiest woman list. So we only have numbers 10 and 11 in this film? Totally lame!
Chaba CODENAME: Hibiscus (Jintara Poonlarp) – The ugly chai Lai. We aren’t calling her this, the film treats her like it’s an amazing achievement she gets a boyfriend. Totally lame, Thailand. Jintara Poonlarp is a famous luk tung singer. In fact, she’s my favorite luk tung singer. And that’s not just because she’s the only luk tung singer I know.
Pouy-sian CODENAME: Crown of Thorns (Kessarin Ektawatkul) – Every other flower name the subtitles translate into common names, but as Pouy-sian’s flower’s name is Crown of Thorns, the subtitles opt for laziness and leave her as Pouy-sian. Lame. Kessarin Ektawatkul is Thailand’s former National Tae Kwon Do Champion, also starred in the remake of Born to Fight.
Na-wua CODENAME: Spadix (Bunyawan Pongsuwan) – Bunyawan Pongsuwan is the only one of the five chai-Lais to not rate a Wikipedia page. Or hardly any Google links. So she is a mystery. I’ll start a rumor that she refuses to eat spinach because she worships it. And if she ever gets a Wikipedia page I’ll just edit that in. No longer a mystery, are you, Pongsuwan?
Tony Jeng (Petchtai Wongkamlao) – The chai Lais’ handler is the Bosley guy of our group, probably named Tony Jeng but I’m not 100% because these subtitles were wack. The Charlie he works for is probably named Mr. Somsak, which also sounds lame and he’s only voiced in like once, so what’s the point? Tony Jeng wears a different wig in every scene he’s in, which might be a weak attempt at a running gag. Petchtai Wongkamlao is better known as Mum Jokmok, but of course you knew that.
King Kong (Wanasak Srilar) – More than meets the eye, if you catch my drift. If you don’t catch my drift, she’s got a wang, you dolt! King Kong ain’t got nothing on me! ‘Twas beauty killed the beast.
Miki (?????) – Daughter of the Keeper of the Pearl, kidnapped by Dragon because she knows the location of the pearl. Eventually joins the chai Lais thanks to the lack of minor labor laws in Thailand. But it beats being sold into sex slavery.
Ms. Mei Ling (????) – married to Miki’s father despite keeping her Chinese last name and also being evil. I dunno if she was still married but it looked like it in the beginning. So do a background check on your wife, people. She may be an evil henchwoman looking for a magical pearl that only you know the location of.
Dragon (???) – The evil boss who gets mad all the time, dresses in suits that were only in style around 1985, and has a son with Downs syndrome that doesn’t even factor into the plot about trying to find a valuable pearl. Talk about your missed opportunities to give him motivation.
Kathleen (Salani Chachacha?) – Crazy assistant to King Kong, cross-eyed and bad aim. Dresses like a blind hooker in Paris Hilton’s retro closet. Secretly a good agent, because the script said so. Or something. I don’t care.

Triangle Connection

Another new film coming out is Triangle Connection. This one comes from the wacky land of Japan, where things are weird. Thus, this movie is weird as well. But it does look like fun, and has a Space Ninja named Shadowstar. Don’t take my word for it, find out for yourself! Okay, I did some work for you…
Official site with lots of photos, too bad it is all in Japanese.

Synopsis translated by NipponCinema.com:

16 years ago a popular television show was on the air called “Space Ninja: Starshadow”. It was very popular with children, but when a stuntman was injured during the filming, the star (Kenji Ohba) felt so guilty about it he abruptly left the show.

Three high school girls; Eruna (Minami Tsukui), Yuika (Yui Sawada), and Maria (Yui Iwata) hang out in the Tennoji district of Osaka. The centerpiece of their group, Maria, is a popular teen idol. One day during one of Maria’s fan gatherings, she meets a math genius named Takehiko from Keihanna university who just managed to escape from a group of terrorists with the program needed to stop several bombs planted throughout Osaka from detonating. As Maria and her friends get caught up in Takehiko’s frantic attempt to save Osaka, Starshadow suddenly appears to help fight the terrorists.

Photos:
2
1
3
4
5

Trailer

Alien Grey: Zone-X

Alien Grey: Zone X


New movie coming out with monsters, aliens, crazy dudes, explosions, and hot chicks. It looks like it might be fun, hopefully it is. The only danger in films like this is if they spend too much time with people walking in between horrible things happening to them or action sequences or explosions.

Official Site
Movie synopsis given on the site:

Power Outage…
Stranded in the Desert…
Against the Elements…
Stalked by a Mad Man…
And…
Experimented on by:
Alien Greys!
Will You Survive:
Zone-X?
“Alien Grey: Zone-X”

Sounds like a very bad day!

Co-Executive Producers: Thomas R. Dickens and David Burke
Directed by Thomas R. Dickens
starring David Burke, Holly Poplawski, James Zito III, Wallace Dorian, Chris Harper, Jai Johnston, Jessica Walker, J.P. Edwards, Teresa Giammusso, Travon Collins.

Special effects from Mesozoic, Inc.

Trailers:

Thanks to Avery!

Ajooba Kudrat Ka

1991 Bollywood horror film directed by the Ramsay brothers, except this one appears to have sections for children, and the biggest feature – a bigfoot-like monster! He has armadillo legs, but he is a bigfoot!

cast:
Shagufta Ali
Hemant Birje
Manjeet Kullar
Deepak Parashar
Sonam

Directed by Shyam Ramsay and Tulsi Ramsay
Music Director: Ajit Singh

Here is a hand-painted Ghanan film poster:
Ajooba Kudrat Ka

This film looks like it could be ridiculously fun. Since the Ramsay Brothers are somewhat well known, the movie is on VCD – Induna Link – Notice the cover art barely includes the bigfoot!

Susie Arabia link – With screencaps! See the Bigfoot in action!

Red chlorophyll

Red chlorophyll is like green chlorophyll but it is red. Hey, don’t expect poetry, there isn’t much you can say introducing it that you shouldn’t already know! There is red, green, and blue chlorophyll, but this is a new version that does Red Edge. Which means absorbs the light near the infrared spectrum. That means if you were wearing Infrared goggles, you would just see a big black spot. I am sure you want to know what horrible thing I am using this for…but it is TOP SECRET!!!! MuHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Living On ‘The Red Edge’: Rare Form Of Chlorophyll Discovered In Newly Sequenced Bacterium

ScienceDaily (Feb. 11, 2008) — Researchers at Washington University in St. Louis and Arizona State University have sequenced the genome of a rare bacterium that harvests light energy by making an even rarer form of chlorophyll, chlorophyll d. Chlorophyll d absorbs “red edge,” near infrared, long wave length light, invisible to the naked eye.

In so doing, the cyanobacterium Acaryochloris marina, competes with virtually no other plant or bacterium in the world for sunlight. As a result, its genome is massive for a cyanobacterium, comprising 8.3 million base pairs, and sophisticated. The genome is among the very largest of 55 cyanobacterial strains in the world sequenced thus far, and it is the first chlorophyll d –containing organism to be sequenced .

Robert Blankenship. Ph.D., Lucille P. Markey Distinguished Professor in Arts & Sciences at Washington University, and principal investigator of the project, said with every gene of Acaryochloris marina now sequenced and annotated, the immediate goal is to find the enzyme that causes a chemical structure change in chlorophyll d, making it different from primarily chlorophyll a, and b, but also from about nine other forms of chlorophyll.

“The synthesis of chlorophyll by an organism is complex, involving 17 different steps in all,” Blankenship said. “Some place near the end of this process an enzyme transforms a vinyl group to a formyl group to make chlorophyll d. This transformation of chemical forms is not known in any other chlorophyll molecules.”

Blankenship said he and his collaborators have some candidate genes they will test. They hope to insert these genes into an organism that makes just chlorophyll a. If the organism learns to synthesize chlorophyll d with one of the genes, the mystery of chlorophyll d synthesis will be solved, and then the excitement will begin.

Blankenship and his colleagues from both institutions published a paper on their work in the Feb. 4, online edition of the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences. The work was supported by the National Science Foundation and also involved collaborators from Australia and Japan. Three Washington University undergraduate students and one graduate student participated in the project, as well as other research personnel.

Harvesting solar power through plants or other organisms that would be genetically altered with the chlorophyll d gene could make them solar power factories that generate and store solar energy. Consider a seven-foot tall corn plant genetically tailored with the chlorophyll d gene to be expressed at the very base of the stalk. While the rest of the plant synthesized chlorophyll a, absorbing short wave light, the base is absorbing “red edge” light in the 710 nanometer range. Energy could be stored in the base without competing with any other part of the plant for photosynthesis, as the rest only makes chlorophyll a. Also, the altered corn using the chlorophyll d gene could become a super plant because of its enhanced ability to harness energy from the sun.

That model is similar to how Acaryochloris marina actually operates in the South Pacific, specifically Australia’s Great Barrier Reef. Discovered just 11 years ago, the cyanobacterium lives in a symbiotic relationship with a sponge-like marine animal popularly called a sea squirt . The Acaryochloris marina lives beneath the sea squirt, which is a marine animal that lives attached to rocks just below the surface of the water. The cyanobacterium absorbs “red edge” light through the tissues of its pal the sea squirt.

The genome, said Blankenship, is ” fat and happy. Acaryochloris marina lies down there using that far red light that no one else can use. The organism has never been under very strong selection pressure to be lean and mean like other bacteria are. It’s kind of in a sweet spot. Living in this environment is what allowed it to have such dramatic genome expansion.”

Blankenship said that once the gene that causes the late-step chemical transformation is found and inserted successfully into other plants or organisms, that it could potentially represent a five percent increase in available light for organisms to use.

“We now have genetic information on a unique organism that makes this type of pigment that no other organism does,” Blankenship said. “We don’t know what all the genes do by any means. But we’ve just begun the analysis. When we find the chlorophyll d enzyme and then look into transferring it into other organisms, we’ll be working to extend the range of potentially useful photosynthesis radiation.’

Animal attack ray trials successful!

My Animal Attack Ray has had a successful trial, turning peaceful dolphins into brutal killing machines. No one will suspect Flipper is capable of death! Now that I can affect Marine Mammals, the next step is Land Mammals, so expect stories about people being attacked by zebras, cows, deer, squirrels, and ibex! Soon, I will have a unstoppable animal army! The best part is, you can’t fight the army, because they will all be endangered species and it will be illegal to shoot them! MuHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Leaping dolphin gives Fla. boaters cuts, bruises

Thu Oct 9, 11:28 PM ET

EDGEWATER, Fla. – A woman is recovering in Florida after a dolphin hit her when it leaped aboard the boat she was in.

The Coast Guard says witnesses called 911 Thursday after seeing the dolphin jump from the Intracoastal Waterway and hit Barbara Howard of Mansfield, Ohio. Howard was sitting in an 18-foot boat with her husband, their daughter and their daughter’s boyfriend.

The Howards say the dolphin jumped about six feet high and landed on the bow. They say it slid in their laps and its thrashing tail knocked them to the deck. Their daughter’s boyfriend rolled the dolphin back into the water.

The husband and wife were treated at a hospital for cuts and bruises and released.