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Teabag Mania 2 – Electric Teabaggaloo!

Teabaggers continue their march of screeching and hooting and hollaring and marching against socialism on public property after taking public transit downtown and then returning home to get their medicare. But, socialism!!!!

No caps in my health care!
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I don’t understand terms made up by the media!
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Parasite in chief, unlike us hardworking teleprompter joke tellers!
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I’m just stinking because of other reasons…
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go to my crazy website!
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Count the misspellings and win a prize!
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Everyone sign my crazy petition that I sort of made look like the Declaration of Independence
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Candy Cane Paul Reveere Ladies Against Socialist Marxism Communism Nazis!
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Because he’s a TERRORIST, see! I honestly believe the President of the United States wants to destroy the country! Also, I just bought some swampland…
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Buy a filing cabinet!
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Amerikkka
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Murder the President!
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Wah! The top 5% are totally mistreated!
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Cardboard Obamas against Obama!
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I’ll just replace all this foul language with Democratic politician names, because I want to lower the level of discourse to below sewer levels.
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The Nazis would love it if America had universal health care! Somehow…
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Black marcher spotted!! No, wait, just a white guy in a mask.
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If “It” is love of torture and being related to morons, I am glad I don’t have it.
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I don’t know how to make signs people can read!
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More coming soon. Thanks to photo collectors/takes such as LF, Revelatos715, Tad Ghostal, POTUShead, and the web streams!

Teabag Mania hits DC!

Those nasty teabaggers are at it again, teaing and bagging and holding signs while declaring they aren’t the social studies or something. This weekend almost a full thousand of them bussed down to DC to listen to dozens of people give 1 minute speeches and to try to meet Glenn Beck. Their crowd of 99.44% white people pushing sixty and overweight gives us a keen insight into the minds of people who listen to talk radio. Or something. What it really does is give us cool signs to make fun of. And that’s what we all want!

How many of those kids are Democrats?
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Wait, is he a racist, a czar, a mafia, or a communist?
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No, up YOUR Obama! And where was No More Debt guy the past 8 years?
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Psst: You are the ones being controlled!
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Yeah, let’s overthrow the democratically elected government of the USA!
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Close up of Overthrow the Government Guy
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During the speeches, the public was enthralled as a charismatic black guy took the stage…wait a minute! (there were more black speakers than actually marchers)
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I disagree
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Yeah! It’s totally oven time!
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This screams sanity
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Don’t tread on my lawn chair
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Message continued on next sign…
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The LaRoucheites are coming! The LaRoucheites are coming!
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No.
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ACORN!!!!!!
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Darn those Terriorists!
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I got my kids holding up signs saying we will run over and murder elected officials! Isn’t that cute?
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COMMUNISM!!
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Should’ve, would’ve, could’ve
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Not our currency!
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More pictures will be upped soon. Giving thanks to collectors and takers such as POTUShead, Revelatos715, the webstream, and others.

GlennBeckRapedAndMurderedAYoungGirlIn1990.com

We here at TarsTarkas.net aren’t saying that Glenn Beck in fact DID rape and murder a young girl in 1990, but really who is to say that it never happened? Where is the evidence against this claim and when will it be released to the public? What is Glenn Beck afraid of exactly and why has he not commented on such allegations? It does a disservice to the foundations that this country was built and founded upon to suggest that Glenn Beck didn’t raped and murder a young girl in 1990 and the question we American citizens just want answered is whether Glenn Beck raped and murdered a young girl in 1990 or not. That’s a yes or no question and would take only a few seconds to respond to. Beck silence on the issue can only serve as a damning admission of guilt.

Glenn Beck Raped And Murdered A Young Girl In 1990

Glenn Beck Raped And Murdered A Young Girl In 1990

But what’s even better about the website GlennBeckRapedandMurderedAYoungGirlin1990.com is that it serves up ice cold political parody at its finest. Originally started in a thread on FARK, the rumor has turned into its own meme, spawning image macros, YouTube videos, Yahoo Answers threads, and a whole gaggle of angry FOX lawyers and one red-faced Glenn Beck (who rape and murdered a young girl in 1990). Why accuse Glenn Beck of such a dastardly deed? Well, if you follow Beck’s show at all, you’d understand that the accusation that Glenn Beck Raped and Murdered a Young Girl in 1990 is no less of a falsehood than many of the other rumors and accusations Beck propagates on his own television and radio shows (Obama’s birth certificate, the constructions of FEMA death camps, our country’s fall into Socialism and somehow simultaneously into Fascism, Obama being a racist, Healthcare killing your grandmother, I could go on and on…). Any Beck fan would know that just because there is a mountain of evidence, documents, witnesses, and logic that disproves any of these claims doesn’t exactly mean that the contrary is the truth at all!

If we want to be “journalists” about this like Glenn Beck is we’d first have to ignore all the rational evidence.

Ok. Done.

Now we have to look at the claim itself and take every word apart to analyze the statement. “Glenn” “Beck” “Raped” “And” “Killed” “A” “Young” “Girl” “In” “1990”. Good, now that we have the item in an easy to understand form (this is the only kind of information Glenn Beck can process) we need to repeat it really loudly to our audience so they know that our position is that “Glenn Beck Raped And Killed A Young Girl In 1990”. Next, we again ignore the evidence the mainstream media is paying attention to and instead look at the results of a very scientific poll we conducted 20 minutes ago:

94% of the nation can't be wrong!

84% of the nation can't be wrong!

According to the scientific poll 84% of respondents, over half (which is of course the only real indicator of whether or not people believe something), voted “yes” to the question “Do you believe that Glen[n] Beck raped and murdered a girl in 1990”. Now that we have our first piece of damning evidence (yes, this is in fact evidence that will hold up in court if your Glenn Beck), we need a secondary source or document that will confirm our polling data and suspicions about how Glenn Beck raped and murdered a young girl in 1990. Liberals, with their devious media connections, have made it exceedingly difficult for us truth-seekers to get the real dirt that’s out there, so with this in mind instead of getting some factual evidence we will instead forge a document to prove our point right:

Proof that Glenn Beck Rape and Murdered a Young Girl in 1990

Proof that Glenn Beck Rape and Murdered a Young Girl in 1990

As anyone can clearly tell from this document, Glenn Beck, according to a police report, raped and murdered a young girl in 1990. Equally as heinous, Beck also, according to the police report above, stole a Sanyo cellphone and $2,000 in cash. Clearly the evidence is here to condemn Glenn Beck for raping and murdering a young girl in 1990, so I’m glad someone put together the website GlennBeckRapedandMurderedAYoungGirlIn1990.com to hold him accountable for such crimes. Again, however, we hold the evidence (which is obviously not a forged document based off documents from the Duke Lacrosse rape case in 2006) that proves to the audience that Glenn Beck raped and murdered a young girl in 1990 and therefore means it is the God honest truth, so why doesn’t Beck come forward to defend himself from these accusations?

It’s cause he is guilty. This has been an episode of Glenn Beck Rapes and Murdered a Young Girl in 1990, thanks so much for watching!

UPDATE:

Glenn Beck still has not come forward to admit his guilt in the rape and murder of a young girl in 1990, but otherwise there is some cheery fallout from the whole affair. Suggestions for Google searches on Glenn Beck now come in with “did Glenn Beck rape” and “did Glenn Beck murder” as the top two queries, among other hilarious phrases, not to mention that most blogs and newspapers have been on fire “reporting” this story as if it was an actual piece of news that had any kind of truth or relevancy to it. But maybe that was the point. A whole lively forum discussion on the ever growing mountain of evidence proving Glenn Beck raped and murdered a young girl in 1990 can be found here. Oh, and if you need ANY MORE evidence (that Glenn Beck raped and murdered a young girl in 1990), a lawsuit is being brought up by Beck’s minion of lawyers that accuse the url to the website GlennBeckRapedandMurderedAYoungGirlIn1990.com is defamatory and should be taken down. The lawsuit doesn’t refute any of the content on the website, however, only the title of the domain name, so ipso facto Glenn Beck is admitting his guilt with this lawsuit that only condemns the suggestion of Beck’s crime but none of the evidence that he, Glenn Beck, raped and murdered a young girl in 1990.

Wingnut Web – Resistnet Will Kill Their Families Edition

With the march on DC on 9/12 coming up, Resistnet.com has gotten to hootin’ and hollarin’ and making a big ruckus, filling their boards with posts that make schoolchildren cry. We got conspiracies, more conspiracies, birthers, Secret Service visits, keyboard warriors, and civil war fantasies. All topped off with one of the worst posts ever. It will even get nuttier when 9/12 accomplishes absolutely nothing, so this is only the beginning. Excuse me while I remember the Knights Templar and then give these posts “the treatment”

Preacher shoots for a gold star by combining the Food Shortage Conspiracy Theory with the Swine Flu is Fake Conspiracy Theory into a Super Conspiracy of Dumb.
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If I see that “TarsTarkus” I will kick his butt!
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People who know stuff are horrible monsters!
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Harvard made my cousin GAY! Now she does Social Work! The horror…
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Uh, DJ, that IS Capitalism at its finest! But way to promote Progressive, Liberal REGULATIONS against monopolies! It’s the kind of thing some intellectual might do…
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I think DJ sees Russians everywhere, even in her alphabet soup!
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Anything I say about this post will not be as funny as the post itself
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DJ can’t wait to rub Kenyan birth certificates in every RUSSIAN INTELLECTUALS face
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I would love it if Will Smith came to my house…
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I hope Sandy Smith really thinks Barack Obama dodged the draft in junior high.
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Yes, my mom always said that to me…
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No one on Resistnet knows anything at all about lawyering (it is all INTELLECTUAL stuff)
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Standard procedure was a small win! Today Orly had a small win because the light at the intersection turned green!
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Ah, the magical powers of self-delusion…
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Gun Avatar guy will probably be speaking a different tune when Orly loses again
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OR the case gets laughed out of court
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Is that anything like Order 66? Is Obama going to kill all the Jedi?
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Hillary is killing people in Kenya now? Jedi Kenyans?
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Oh, no! Someone from Resistnet got a Secret Service visit? Shocking!
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Wait, I thought everyone defended the CIA from the evil liberals…
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Not just the sheriff, the High Sheriff
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Wait, DJ got a visit as well? I would have never guessed…
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Yeah, THAT will hold up…
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I don’t remember the Bible mentioning American Conservative Websites, but whatever
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Yeah, right, Skip Foss. If a cop talked to you, you would pee your pants.
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And finally, Cynthia Gialluca posts a long, LONG story where basically she discovers her moderate mother has switched sides and voted for Obama and is pro-health care reform. This leads to a huge fight where her and her husband bring up all sorts of debunked lies. Cynthia then posts this later:
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Yes, Cynthia Gialluca is fantasizing about killing her mother. This is one of the worst posts ever on Resistnet.com. That is the Republican base right now.

Wingnut Web – FreeRepublic Likes Balls Edition

Wingnut Web time again, this day and age we shall visit that bastion of conservative slime FreeRepublic.com! When their leader isn’t writing speeches about drawing lines in the sand or touring the country in a bus with a tea bag on the side of it, they are busy posting some of the most vile comments on the internet. I barely spend any time there and I get tons of material. It is like a never-ending fountain of hateful rhetoric. Let’s start out with an example of the FreeRepublic.com reaction to Obama addressing schoolchildren – animated gifs!

This is a true representation of that day…
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FDRQ=Filthy Disease-Ridden Queers. This guy is proud of beating up people in high school!
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Psst: Americans RIGHT NOW are ashamed of you, and not for the reasons you think!
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Praise the Lord, a routine court act happened!
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Yeah…IF
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Frakking multi-ethnics are WEIRD! Back in my day the races only mixed to hang the darker ones…
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BiLies be racist
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More racism fun!
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SOMEONE has a chip on their shoulder…
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I will laugh when she loses.
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It is alsmot like the czars are a made up media term and not a conspiracy or something!
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Now they are speaking in code
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McCain calls for Joe Wilson to apologize for heckling Obama, earning the ire of Freep!
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Yes, eject the few people from your party left that still have common sense…
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jonrick46 was totally masturbating as he typed this.
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How dare Lieberals CRITICIZE? Only WE can do that!
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You can say you are a moron.
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How quickly they turned on poor Joe Wilson…
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Hey, look, it’s me in 2003 posting about Iraq!
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Let’s kill all civilians!
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Which piggie is the one with the roast beef?
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More support for murdering women and children and babies and goats!
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Nuke mountains! That will totally have no drawbacks ever!
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FreeRepublic.com, never change, because then I wouldn’t have any updates!

Wingnut Web – Joseph Farah's mustache voted sexiest in World(NetDaily)

The other night on the Rachael Maddow Show there was a really good segment featuring one Johnathan Henke, co-founding editor of the spiffy looking TheNextRight.com, a conservative opinion website I had never even heard of until viewing the Rachael Maddow Show the other night. Being the host of such a LIEbral show on the DEMONcratic-leaning MSNBC, Maddow started the segment acknowledging that Henke’s appearance on the program was a tad out of place for the network, but despite differences in political opinion and ideology the two had a civil and hilarious discussion about the current state of Wingnuttery in the United States and the sometimes shadowy forces who are hard at work shaping and pushing forward the equally hilarious Wingnut agenda. One force in particular, a “Libertarian” news website which tends to fall on the “batshit insane” side of the political spectrum, was called out during the interview for not only fueling the rabid fever dreams of most Wingnut jobs in the US, but also for continually repeating and repeating the fantastical conspiracy theory that the Obama administration is setting up FEMA internment camps to lock up all the white folks in, or in the words of WorldNetDaily, “…concentration camps for political dissidents, such as occurred in Nazi Germany”.

Henke, as a Conservative and as a well-spoken intellectual and independent thinker (“thinker” is the keyword here), has a problem with WorldNetDaily and presumably other sites of its ilk because they have been incredibly complacent in the “retardization” (my words) of Conservative and Libertarian politics ever since people started flocking to the web for their daily doses of political outrage, government conspiracy, and ads for snarky bumper stickers. WND caters to a whole host of wacky wackjobs, the fluoride mind-control crowd, the black helicopter NWO brigade, Amero stockpilers, and until very recently the Deathers, Birthers, and  Tea-Baggers. WorldNetDaily publishes “breaking news” that caters to these crowds so frequently, in fact, you can gauge the credibility of a website just by looking to see if they link to WND content or not. FreeRepublic.com, InfoWars.com, PrisonPlanet.com, even Stormfront.org all love the warm, mind-numbing, pulse-quickening drivel that World Net Daily churns out on a regular basis.

But who is behind WorldNetDaily? Even with a website like The Drudge Report the creator and editor-in-chief is brave and straightforward enough to include his own name the title of the website. Turns out that WorldNetDaily is the brainchild of Joseph Farah, a one-time newspaper editor and conservative columnist, whose likes have been featured in The Los Angeles Times, Chicago Sun-Times, and Wall Street Journal, and one-time contender for Most Obnoxious Facial Hair on the Planet (US Division, Mens). Farah has had a fair share of criticism levied against him throughout the years, mostly for being an inept editor who is the laughing stock of legitimate journalists everywhere and a MASSIVE hypocrite when it comes to any issue of freedom of speech or press (you know, those issues that real journalists care about and fight to uphold). That is why when Johnathan Henke calls for a boycott of WorldNetDaily’s web advertisers Mr. Farah felt the need to address his critics directly (and by directly I mean barely not at all).

Geraldo ain't got nuthin' on this

Geraldo ain't got nuthin' on this

Being the ever vigilant selfless journalist he is, Farah issued a response to Henke’s criticism of WorldNetDaily, an odd stream of consciousness editorial that can really only be described as a grown baby’s pissing fit over some meanie individual insulting his favorite toy:

Indeed, WND’s journalistic coups have been systematically ignored by our colleagues

for the last 12 years.

And we fully expect George Soros front organizations like Media Matters to wage jihad against WND. After all, organizations like that believe the news media are too skeptical of Big Government. I have always believed a truly free and independent press can never be skeptical enough of Big Government.

So, for 12 years, whether the White House was occupied by Republicans or Democrats and no matter who was running the show in Congress, WND has consistently been a watchdog on government. This is what we do. This is what we have always done. This is what we will continue to do no matter from which direction the brickbats fly.

Lately, many of the brickbats have come from bloggers who call themselves “conservatives.”

Now, much of the criticism of WND over the last 12 years has been motivated by jealousy. I’ve always recognized that. Some of these people just can’t understand why their blogs aren’t as big and influential – even among their target constituency – as WND is.

George Soros *wahh* *wahh* jihad against WND *wahh* *wahh* motivated by jealousy *wahh* *wahh* these people can’t understand why their blogs aren’t as big and influential *wahh* *wahh*. Oh an also what’s a brickbat? That’s some seriously antiquated whining right there. Instead of approaching the real issue in his editorial however, the fact that people want to boycott WorldNetDaily and its advertisers because WorldNetDaily furthers the unthinking if-you-should-loudly-you-are-right political mentality out there, Farah would rather sit there and stroke his long, thick, lustrous ego and defer that his website fights the good fight against “Big Government”. It’s ironic too how such a seasoned veteran journalist like Farah can’t seem to distinguish what actual journalism, research, or reporting is:

Why they worry that associating with me and WND might tarnish their club, I can’t understand. There’s a movement right now to try to get the Republican Party to stop advertising on WND. Interestingly, the Obama campaign was a bigger advertiser on WND in 2008 than was the John McCain campaign. And the Republican Party has never been a significant advertiser.

It’s all crazy.

Meanwhile, my colleagues in the news media are having a field day with the story of those attacking WND. They interview all kinds of experts on the subject, but don’t bother to ask me about it.

Watch Rachel Maddow at MSNBC for a classic example of this kind of “journalistic responsibility” in action.

Even when WND is the story, no one asks us to respond or debate.

…Unlike Maddow’s “reporting,” WND’s is actually having an impact. It’s actually drawing an audience. It’s actually appreciated by a growing number of Americans who are sick and tired of media and government and political experts telling them how to think.

Yeah, it’s not “reporting” or “journalistic responsibility” when a journalist files a report about your organization, shining a not so positive light on it, then calling on a legitimate source to further explain why your website sucks and how you’ve contributed to a systematic dumbing down of any Conservative argument out there by going bey0nd the bounds of logic and sanity into Wingnut territory, “reporting” on unfounded conspiracy claims like they were real news items of public interest. Oh yeah, but you went to college and got a Journalism degree, Joesph Farah, so you must know that deep down what your doing doesn’t represent the profession at all.

Are you sure that wasn’t a degree in Advertising you got because it’s the only thing your website seems to do half-decently. We all know a real journalist would stop and question whether it’s a good idea to insert advertisements for books, DVDs, and other schlock in between articles and content, not labeling them as such with the expectation that users will click on ads for “Obama Antichrist predictions” and “holistic colon cleansings” because you know your readers are crazy like that. So much for “journalistic responsibility”, Farah. But really, where is it my position to question any of this? Farah must be rolling in dough from the click-throughs for survival products and Cash4Gold adverts as well as sales of bumper stickers, coffee mugs, and mouse pads all baring the WND logo.

Still, I can sleep soundly at night though knowing Joseph Farah has no legitimate counter argument for any of this. Like most of his kind he’s in it for the money, a fact that’s hilariously and clearly indicated by his craptacular website’s design and Farah’s nervous scrambling when a pundit calls on people to boycott WND’s advertisers. Being a journalist however, I’m sure at some point Farah’s respect for truth will surface and he’ll come out against himself, bragging that his last 12 years with World Net Daily have all been a farce and a social experiment to see just how far an individual can push the bounds of decency and teeshirt sales. Right?

For more Joseph Farah related idiocy please visit the following links:

Joseph Farah’s Twitter

Right Wing Watch – Joseph Farah

Media Matters.org – Joseph Farah