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The Razzies Breaking Yawn their way to another boring year

Simpsons I Used to Believe in Things as a Kid

I get now why they call themselves the Razzies, it’s not because of the rude sound of the raspberry, but because they go after low hanging fruit in an attempt to get attention. Luckily, I’m avoiding their clever plan by…giving them attention??? D’oh!

In any event, here are their nominations. Notice that once again they nominate Twilight for everything and Adam Sandler for everything. They also lump Battleship in with the worst pictures and directors despite that film not being terrible. But, you know, board game movie. It’s got a stigma. At least Oogieloves and Atlas Shrugged deserve to be on there (and I admit, That’s My Boy does as well…)

Worst Picture
Battleship
The Oogieloves in the Big Balloon Adventure
That’s My Boy
A Thousand Words
The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part II

Worst Director
Sean Anders – That’s My Boy
Peter Berg – Battleship
Bill Condon – The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part II
Tyler Perry – Good Deeds / Madea’s Witness Protection
John Putch – Atlas Shrugged: Part II

Worst Actress
Katherine Heigl – One for the Money
Milla Jovovich – Resident Evil: Retribution
Tyler Perry – Madea’s Witness Protection
Kristen Stewart – The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part II / Snow White and the Huntsman
Barbra Streisand – The Guilt Trip

Worst Actor
Nicolas Cage – Ghost Rider 2: Spirit of Vengeance / Seeking Justice
Eddie Murphy – A Thousand Words
Robert Pattinson – The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part II
Tyler Perry – Alex Cross / Good Deeds
Adam Sandler – That’s My Boy

Worst Supporting Actress
Jessica Biel – Playing For Keeps / Total Recall
Brooklyn Decker – Battleship / What to Expect When You’re Expecting
Ashley Greene – The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part II
Jennifer Lopez – What to Expect When You’re Expecting
Rihanna – Battleship

Worst Supporting Actor
David Hasselhoff – Pirannha 3-DD
Taylor Lautner – The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part II
Liam Neeson – Battleship / Wrath of the Titans
Nick Swardson – That’s My Boy
Vanilla Ice – That’s My Boy

Worst Screen Ensemble
Battleship
The Oogieloves in the Big Balloon Adventure
That’s My Boy
The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part II
Madea’s Witness Protection

Worst Screenplay
Atlas Shrugged Part II
Battleship
That’s My Boy
A Thousand Words
The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part II

Worst Remake, Rip-Off, or Sequel
Ghost Rider 2: Spirit of Vengeance
Pirannha 3-DD
Red Dawn
The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part II
Madea’s Witness Protection

Worst Screen Couple
Any two cast members from Jersey Shore in The Three Stooges
Mackenzie Foy and Taylor Lautner in The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part II
Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart in The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part II
Tyler Perry and his drag in Madea’s Witness Protection
Adam Sandler and Andy Samberg, Leighton Meester, or Susan Sarandon in That’s My Boy

via The Playlist

Korea's got their own Infenal Affairs with New World

Korea gets into the undercover cop movie business with New World/Sinsegye/신세계

Lee Jung-Jae plays an undercover detective who rises through the ranks of the local mafia, eventually becoming the number 2 guy beneath the newly installed boss. The detective then has to balance the mob boss who believes and trusts him versus his police superiors, who think of him nothing more than a pawn in their gang takedown. Hwang Jung-Min plays the mob boss, while Oldboy‘s Choi Min-Sik plays the police supervisor.

Park Hoon-Jung wrote and directs (he wrote I Saw the Devil, so this has a change of being good and grim!) And Choi Min-Sik is always awesome. It will be worth a watch!

See a preview trailer at AsianMediaWiki!

Choi Min-Sik

You cannot out act me, you can only get out of the way!

New Pacific Rim Trailer!!!


We got another Pacific Rim trailer with a bunch of new action and I think it’s impossible for me to be more hyped for this film. If I were to express my excitement in text form there would be a solid line of exclamation points until the opening night! For the sake of readability and my database size, I’ll not do that…yet! Until then, let’s just geek out on the trailers and posters because that’s what we do!

When legions of monstrous creatures, known as Kaiju, started rising from the sea, a war began that would take millions of lives and consume humanity’s resources for years on end. To combat the giant Kaiju, a special type of weapon was devised: massive robots, called Jaegers, which are controlled simultaneously by two pilots whose minds are locked in a neural bridge. But even the Jaegers are proving nearly defenseless in the face of the relentless Kaiju. On the verge of defeat, the forces defending mankind have no choice but to turn to two unlikely heroes—a washed up former pilot (Charlie Hunnam) and an untested trainee (Rinko Kikuchi)—who are teamed to drive a legendary but seemingly obsolete Jaeger from the past. Together, they stand as mankind’s last hope against the mounting apocalypse.

Rocket Punch

We need Rocket Punch!

Machine Man Bangla

InAPPropriate Comedy deserves a response…

A response of the inappropriate type! InAPPropriate Comedy is the latest brainchild from ShamWow guy Vince Offer (also creator of The Underground Comedy Movie, which should have stayed buried) and the film looks as good as you would think, which means I’ll get the poison and you get the razors, lets see which one saves us from having to watch InAPPropriate Comedy!

Link to the RedBand Trailer, which has InAPPropriate language and boner jokes.

Lindsay Lohan does “her fantasy of taking an ultimate revenge on the salivating paparazzi who haunt her” – aka kills them in the style of all those awful shootings that make the news each day. That’s so InAPPropriate!

Adrien Brody is Flirty Harry, who is a tough cop who is gay. As in he says “Go ahead. Make me gay.” That is a joke. In 2013. InAPPropriate!

Don’t worry, Rob Schneider and Michelle Rodriguez will add some class. InAPPropriate class!

There is only one true InAPProprate —–> Clive Clemmons Inappropriate Response Channel!

Clive Clemmons Inappropriate Response Channel

Crill Bowley | Myspace Video

via PopWatch
Official site
InAPPropriate Comedy

InAPPropriate Comedy

Machine Man Bangla

Vampire Academy 5: Assignment Miami Beach

It’s that time again to go over all the stories that I was too lazy to write about when they came out, what with the real world getting in my face with all this Christmas cheer and ODing on candy canes. Well, I’m out of the candy cane rehab clinic and back. We got some awful things that have appeared, some less than awful things, and some curiosities. As usual, I have some links to cool articles, though I am always looking for more cool things, so feel free to suggest for the next roundup! Now, let’s roll!

**The live action film about Acme – the company that Wile E. Coyote gets all his gadgets from, is moving forward and is becoming basically an unofficial Steve Jobs biopic. Producer Dan Lin spoke about how it will allow them to do all sorts of wacky inventions. But without those inventions leading to cartoon violence, I’m not so certain. Who wants to see an actual human plummet off a cliff to his doom? Will it be like Roger Rabbit when a steamrollered Judge Doom gets up and things look freaky? In any event, I’d rather stay at home draining suckers dry when the river gets dealt thanks to a Party Poker bonus code. But we’ll see. Did you know that Broomcorn’s Uncle is an actual poker term? That’s make a good film title…

**The book series Vampire Academy by Richelle Mead is becoming a film, with Heathers writer Dan Waters doing the script and his brother and Mean Girls director Mark Waters helming the film. The books sound just like you think they do, with a female teenage lead and vampire politics. Sadly there is no vampire who makes sound effects with his mouth. What kind of lame Academy movie is that??

Set in the present day against a hidden universe of vampires, half-humans, alchemy, and magic. Richelle Mead shifts the focus from the brooding male vampires of Twilight, “True Blood” and “The Vampire Diaries” to that of a strong, yet flawed 17-year-old female who confronts her world with grit, determination, and lots of moxie. Rose Hathaway is a dhampir, half human/half vampire, and guardian of the Moroi, a race of peaceful and magical mortal vampires who can walk in the daylight, survive by feeding off willing blood donors, grow old and die. Hidden deep in the forests of Montana is St. Vladimir’s Academy, where Moroi and dhampirs learn to take their place in Moroi society.

Rose must master her inherited abilities as a dhampir and earn the approval of the Royal Council, as guardian to Princess Lissa, her best friend and sole heir of one of the twelve Royal families of Moroi. Rose and Lissa share a mysterious psychic bond and sense of destiny, but first they must survive an intense social scene, politics, and the physical challenges of Moroi life at the Academy. Outside the sanctuary of St. Vladimir’s waits their greatest threat of all, the Strigoi, a race of bloodthirsty immortal vampires and predators of the Moroi.

**BleedingCool has some pics of the cancelled Pixar flick Newt, which got the ax when it turned out it was too similar in plot to Rio. Good thing no one told Pixar about Antz
Newt Pixar

**Battle of the Year 3D is The Mighty Ducks, except with b-boy crews. And the Koreans are evil once again, because this must take place in the Red Dawn remake universe. Chris Brown does finally get put into jail, but only movie jail, and he’s seen punching a bag in the trailer. Good job there, guys. You gotta love a dance crew that has a battle cry of “3D!” And by love, I mean go catch a matinee of The Hobbit instead.

**Pre-Code goes gangster for Blondie Johnson!

**OutlawVern hunts down Django Unchained!

**Have you been following the 200 Best Hong Kong Films Ever countdown on LoveHKFilm? You better be!

**The Great White Dope gets spied by the Eyes of a Stranger!

**Radiation Cinema! counts to The 27th Day!

**Carol tells us the comics she liked in 2012 at The Cultural Gutter!

**I got my MOSS Secret Santa swag from Miguel at Monster Island Resort Podcast. The Dredd badge came right after I watched Dredd, which was freaking awesome and has a rad soundtrack too boot. That Tanya flick is famous in the “chick bones an ape” genre of films. And, yes, that is a vintage 8mm Varan the Unbelievable reel, which is awesome for the cover box art alone. Thanks, Miguel!
MOSS Secret Santa
Check out the latest podcast where Miguel discusses the Gillman from the Creature from the Black Lagoon flicks!

**Bill Plympton has a new flick up on Kickstarter raising funds – Cheatin’ – so if you like his stuff and want to throw money at him, now’s your chance!

**Dodging Myths is my new favorite Kickstarter of all time. Remember to watch all the Word Warrior videos, because you will not be disappointed. That is the word.

Until next time, remember to not enroll in any random academies unless they are Police Academies!