One of the most anticipated film trailers in recent memory has hit the internet, and it’s a decisive “meh.” Which is a shame, but what are you gonna do? 50 Shades of Grey was destined to get all sorts of shade tossed its way no matter how the trailer looked, because it’s already complete with a pack of haters. From the S&M enthusiasts angry that things don’t match reality to fanfic writers angry because this Twilight fanfic made millions while their S&M ponies story didn’t to people who are immature about the subject of sexuality to teenage boys who sit confused at a movie targeted for 30-something housewives, there is no shortage of people who will be making a fuss.

The trailer even failed to impress the toughest critic of all, my wife! Maybe later trailers will do more, but for now, things look strangely vanilla, Ana Steele comes off as boring, and Christian Grey just seemed creepily attracted for no reason at all. But, then, it is Twilight… I’m just sad my fantasy casting of Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson will never happen, because that would have blown everyone’s minds! We’ll just have to see how Dakota Johnson and Jamie Dornan do once all the moaning and groaning begins.

Despite all this, and despite the trailer failing to impress too much, 50 Shades of Grey is still a film that we’re going to go see opening weekend, because that’s how we do. Also, do you really want to sit in the chairs at the theater after a couple showings of this film? They might be a bit…..sticky!