Iron Fist: The Giants Are Coming
Demir yumruk: Devler Geliyor
aka Iron Fist: The Giants Are Coming
1970 or 1973
Written and directed by Tunç Basaran
It’s me! Super-Bat-Other Man!
Iron Fist – Giants are Coming is an interesting fantastic Turkish film, because it uses super hero tropes, but isn’t really a super hero film. There is a diabolical villain ripped straight from pulp novels, disguises, and people punching people like they’re in those cliffhanger serials. But the actual masked hero is just a disguise used by the heroes after they fake their deaths. It is very common in these pulp Turkish cinema films for the heroes to essentially be super heroes already, with incredible fighting powers and brains. Often the heroes barely get into their costumes, because they don’t need them. Demir yumruk is a nice bridge of the two groups, and I certainly didn’t think that what transpired was how the super heroics was to be involved.
Our hero Enver is a typical Turkish film hero male, in that he regularly cheats on his girlfriend (who sees it as an amusing quirk – when she’s not violently kicking the other woman out of the house!), spends much of his time hanging out with his bros and at the gym, and gets into long long long physical fights will many many villains without even the slightest of bruises. His girlfriend Meral is a tough undercover woman who can fight just as well as the men while still looking like a fashion model. She is capable of infiltrating all sorts of locations and can dazzle the minds of villains with her belly dancing skills. She even saves Enver, though later he has to save her.
I can pick both nostrils at the same time! Can your Iron Fist do that?
Beyond the ganking of pulp culture iconography and characters, Turkish cinema also features songs ripped from other films, and Demir yumruk is no exception. Surf rock aficionados will find something strangely familiar from the cool tune blasting over the opening credits, and fans of all film will recognize scores of all flavors mixmashed with scenes of completely different tones and movements. Turkey had those YouTube fan videos down pat decades before YouTube.
The influence from serials is especially prevalent, there are multiple long punching fights, and almost every one of the frequent fights has the hero or villain barely escape to menace again in a few minutes. Characters are captured and subsequently rescued, while villains disappear with magic tricks or use gimmick weapons.
The Hamburger Helper glove has gone evil!
Demir yumruk: Devler geliyor features actors in yellowface, and this isn’t the first time we’ve encountered Turkish Yellowface (or even Turkish characters named after Fu Man Chu!) But there is more on display now than I’ve seen before. Besides the Asian gang lead by Fumancu, there is another evil gang of Russians lead by a guy named Zagof. The heroic heroes try to use the enmity of the gangs to their advantage, but it just as often plays to their folly. It certainly ramps up the suspense, we don’t know which gang will become the dominant one until events play out.
Tunç Basaran has been a prolific writer and director in Turkish cinema, with many filmns in the fantasy action genres. In the West he would be best known for his cult cinema work like Iron Fist, the first Tarkan film, and Ayşecik Ve Sihirli Cüceler Rüyalar Ülkesinde, better known as Turkish Wizard of Oz.
Dammit, Gandalf, stick with your own franchise!
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Now this is art!
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Categories: Movie Reviews, Ugly Tags: Altan Günbay, Enver Özer, Feri Cansel, Kayhan Yıldızoğlu, Orgun Alkan, Suleyman Turan, Tarık Şimşek, Tunç Basaran, Turkey, Turkish Super Heroes, yellowface
The Girl from B.I.K.I.N.I.
The Girl from B.I.K.I.N.I.
2007
Written and directed by Fred Olen Ray (as Nicholas Medina)
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I keep mine next to my Merry Marvel Marching Society card!
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In TarsTarkas.NET’s quest to eventually get around to things, several Fred Olen Ray Bikini flicks are on the bucket list. So let’s begin to empty said bucket(which sadly had been buried beneath a pile of thousands of buckets filled with thousands of lists since 2004!) The Girl from B.I.K.I.N.I. is the first of the Tanya X movies (so first that she’s called Tania X here!), which went on to have two sequels (Bikini Royale and Bikini Royale 2) and a webseries that I believe was edited into another film. But this is the one that started it all.
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Attica! Attica!
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The Girl from B.I.K.I.N.I.‘s biggest problem is the date rape sequence. I’ve watched enough of these types of films that I know that slipping a woman some drugs that makes her super-horny is occasionally a thing, but here it’s done in an ultra-sleazy manner and Tanya wakes up with memory loss the next day. It’s disturbing.
Something that is interesting is the scene where Mong Lee (played by white actor Evan Stone), a sort of white warrior servant who wears mixed Asian combat garb, dresses in yellowface as a super stereotypical Asian person, right down to greasy black hair, ridiculous Coke-bottle glasses, and buck teeth. He wears the disguise over his own clothes, which bulge out from underneath, and it is insanely obvious that he is not what he appears to be. Needless to say, the disguise works. The thing is, is this disguise racist, or is the character using Asian stereotypes that the heroes fall for to his advantage to do his job, despite not being Asian? And if so, would that make the heroes racist, and Mong Lee someone who takes advantage of the ignorance of the masses? These are the questions asked by so many people watching these Skinimax flicks at 2am!
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Mission: Impossible 5 was almost as bad as Mission: Impossible 2!
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While the problems all go away by the next Tanya X adventure, we must discuss them, because them’s the rules. The spy genre’s campy nature makes it a ripe ground for parodies, allowing the adding of fantastic elements in addition to the expected hot babes in little clothing. The genre’s mainstream acceptance also means there will be spy erotic parodies for decades to come. Heh-heh-heh, I said “come!”
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The Mime from BIKINI!
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King Kong (1962 – Review)
King Kong
1962
Written by Vishwanath Panday, Pandit Mathur, Mastji, and Majrooh Sultanpuri (lyrics)
Directed by Babubhai Mistry
Not that King Kong, there are no giant apes in this movie, though there are guys who sort of look like giant apes when you squint, or at least fat blogs. Nope, this is 1962s Indian epic King Kong, starring the great Dara Singh in his first starring role. You remember Dara Singh from Samson right? The Infernal Brains Podcast about Dara Singh? Well, if not, you now have a bunch of extra listening and reading to do! For the rest of us, this is an entry in the MOSS (Mysterious Order of the Skeleton Suit) Conspiracy Big Muscle Tussle, featuring dudes and chicks with muscles doing muscular things in muscular ways. Said muscular ways usually means punching many things. Click on the MOSS Page to see many more entries, as long as your roid rage is low enough you won’t Hulk Smash all our webpages. As for King Kong, let’s just say that there is a giant monster in the beginning of the film, but it’s all downhill from there!
Dara Singh was born in 1928 in the Punjab village of Dharmuchak. He wrestled in local tournaments while growing up, but went to Singapore to seek employment as a laborer. He ended up learning East Asian wrestling techniques – in addition to the Indian (and surrounding regions) technique called Pehlwani – and returned to India. With his brother Randhawa, the two became professional wrestlers and soared through the ranks. By the 1970s, Dara and his brother were the highest paid wrestlers in India, earning 30-40 times the going rate for bouts. Dara was also the “world champion” in the local circuits.
Prior to his lead role here, Dara Singh had been relegated to stunt work in films like Sangdil (1952), Pehli Jhalak (First Sight) (1955), and Jagga Daku (1959). In King Kong and many of his later films, Dara helped do the fight choreography, as he thought the usual Indian choreography didn’t look real enough. As Dara Singh comes from a lower caste, there was often trouble finding leading women who would appear with him. Besides Kum Kum from this film, his usual partner was Mumtaz (seen here in Samson) Dara’s lower caste status helped instill him as a hero of the common man, though his films usually had him suddenly discover his noble roots (as this one does.) After his movie career slowed down, Dara Singh gained a new generation of fans when he appeared in the 1980s tv series Ramayana playing Hanuman.
The movie’s title King Kong is even taken from wrestling. Though a reference to the giant ape, King Kong became a wrestling title, one which Dara Singh soon claimed, winning it off of stocky Hungarian wrestler Emile Czaja – who often went billed as King Kong (including his appearance in this film!) Dara winning the King Kong title gave him enough fame that director Babubhai Mistri decided he would be bankable as a leading man. The added fact that it was cheaper for people to buy movie tickets than to pay for wrestling tickets was just gravy. Due to distribution politics/drama, low-budget stunt films like King Kong were usually exhibited in rural areas, often with the director or star in attendance presenting the film.
Director Babubhai Mistri did effects work at Wadia Movietone, and directed many mythologicals in the 1950s (mythologicals being a genre of Indian cinema that does stories from the religious texts.) by by the 60s was unable to direct big picture films, thus he turned to the B movie circuit and making Dara Singh a star.
Like most surviving Dara Singh films, King Kong is available on badly encoded unsubtitled vcd with the craptastic video quality you expect. And the vcd has commercials on it..in the middle of the film! Luckily, a few Dara films have started to migrate to DVD, so maybe, just maybe, we’ll get some of his awesome stunt films on DVD soon…
As this is the inaugural Dara Singh starring flick, they didn’t trust him to headline the picture by his lonesome, so they threw in another character, the handsome swashbuckler type Badal (played by Chandrashekhar) There is also a comic relief sidekick for Badal. Comic relief sidekicks were so in vogue at this time, the evil warrior character Evil Guy also has his own comic relief sidekick. As you have probably noticed by some of the names, I haven’t figured them all out yet.
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Categories: Movie Reviews, Ugly Tags: awful monster costumes, Babubhai Mistry, Bollywood, Chandrashekhar, Dara Singh, India, Kamal Mehra, King Kong, Kum Kum, Leela Mishra, Majrooh Sultanpuri, Mastji, Pandit Mathur, Parveen Choudhary, Sheila Kashmiri, Uma Dutt, Vishwanath Panday, We don't need no stinking subtitles, yellowface
Kizil Maske (1968 Dir. – Çetin Inanç)
Kizil Maske
aka The Red Mask aka Turkish Phantom
1968 SinemaTurk Link
Directed by Çetin Inanç
The Phantom was pretty much the first costumed super hero to have a daily strip in the newspapers. Created by Lee Falk in 1936, the strip continues yet today. The Phantom’s base of operations is the Skull Cave located in the African nation of Bangalla. The Phantom passes down his mantel from father to son for several generations. There is a 1943 serial, which is probably the inspiration for these films, as well as an unofficial follow-up The Adventures of Captain Africa, which was originally going to be a Phantom serial until it was discovered they didn’t have the rights anymore! Check your contracts before you pour money into a project. This is your tip of the day. More information on The Phantom can be found on the internet, maybe you should Google it or something. This isn’t a website that gives you stuff on a silver platter, it is TarsTarkas.NET!
Okay, fine, here is some more Phantom Phacts for you: The Phantom was created by Lee Falk after the success of Mandrake the Magician (who also appeared unauthorized in a Turkish film where he fought Kilink: Mandrake Killing’e Karsi), Falk continued to work on the strip (with brief interruptions) until his death in 1999. The Phantom was the first superhero to not have his pupils show up when wearing a mask. The Phantom operates out of the Skull Cave, and all the previous Phantoms are buried there. Never leave a Phantom behind is their motto. Semper Phantom. The Phantom has three helpers, a mountain wolf called Devil, a horse named Hero, and a trained falcon named Fraka, who must love Battlestar Galactica. He also has dolphins, but dolphins are only good as bonus meat in tuna cans. The current Phantom is #21. The Phantom has two rings, one on each hand. One ring is used to mark his friends, while the second marks his enemies (marks made by punching the enemy in the face!) I am not sure how the friend ring marks work, but I am guessing not the same way.
There are three Turkish versions of the Phantom, two of which are entitled Kizil Maske and came out in 1968. If you think that is confusing, just remember that most of this information I had to decipher from articles written in Turkish! This is the first Kizil Maske, and the other 1968 one is sometimes designated Kizil Maske 2 or Kizil Maske (2). The second film seems to be made to try to bite off the first one, in some sort of Antz/A Bug’s Life or Deep Impact/Armageddon contest. The third Kizil Maske movie is KIZIL MASKE’NIN INTIKAMI (The Phantom’s Revenge), which came out in 1971. As the third movie has little to no information about it anywhere, I cannot say if it is directly related to either of the originals. If you have a copy, send it to me, because that will save me a lot of time looking for it. We are all about being lazy here at TarsTarkas.NET.
This entry was produced, directed, and written by Çetin Inanç, the protege of Yilmaz Atadeniz (who gave world the Kilink films.) Inanc went on to produce a whole ton of Turkish films, both craptacularly awesome superhero fair like this, and more modern stuff that includes violent action films. Kizil Maske translates to Red Mask, in case you were wondering. Remember how in old serials fights would break out all the time randomly, and last like five minutes? That’s pretty much this film. Long fights, lots of manly action, and Turkish men being men. No subtitles, either, because who needs those? At TarsTarkas.NET, we don’t need no stinkin’ subtitles! It is not like you need a flow chart to follow the plot: The bad dudes are bad, and the Phantom punches them for an hour or so. The end.
Let’s meet our exciting cast:
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The Wrestling Women vs. The Aztec Mummy (review)
The Wrestling Women vs. The Aztec Mummy
aka Las Luchadoras contra la momia
1964
Starring
Lorena Velázquez as Gloria Venus (Loretta)
Armando Silvestre as Armando Rios
Elizabeth Campbell as Golden Rubi (Ruby)
Ramón Bugarini as Prince Fujiyata
Víctor Velázquez as Dr. Luis Trelles (Prof. Tracy)
Nathanael “Frankenstein” León as Fujiyata’s bald henchman
Mexico has a proud tradition of Los Luchadoros movies, from Santo fighting Martians to Blue Demon fighting Infernal Brains. Even the women get into the act, this is the second film featuring Las Luchadoras Gloria Venus and Golden Rubi, as well as the forth featuring the title villain, the Aztec Mummy (Earlier film Robot vs. the Aztec Mummy was featured on Mystery Science Theater 3000.) It’s the Mexican version of Aliens vs. Predator, except from the 1960’s and thousands of times better. Like most of the Mexican Wrestling movies, it’s got lots of campy fun. However, this film has a dark side that scars it’s appeal this day. There is a gang of villains in the movie who are an Asian gang. Being that Mexico has like 2 Asian people in the 1960’s, they are all played by Mexicans. So the villains are a yellow-face stereotype similar to anti-Japan films made during World War II. The Yellow-faceness can be argued that they didn’t give the actors false slanted eyes, such as horrible examples on Sean Connery in You Only Live Twice and John Wayne as Genghis Khan in The Conqueror, but they just had actors who looked vaguely Asian. Very vaguely. If you were drunk. And blind. And high on ‘shrooms. Barring that, the film holds together pretty well. Just view it for what it is, an artifact of the times. Sit back, relax, and pull a half-Nelson on your opponent while your tag-team partner distracts the ref so you can hit them with a chair.
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