[adrotate banner=”1″]WWE Studios is still making movies and still putting noted wrestler Larry the Cable Guy into sequels to movies that he wasn’t in to begin with. The latest is Jingle All the Way 2, a sequel to the 1996 film that starred Arnold Schwarzenegger and Sinbad as competing fathers trying to get the hottest toy of the year. Larry the Cable Guy will be teamed with Santino Marella, who actually is a wrestler. Alex Zamm of Tooth Fairy 2 fame will direct.
Jingle All the Way has seen a resurgence of popularity recently, buffered on by True 90s Kids remember the 90s, and fans of Phil Harman. Let us not forget the legion of fans of Jake Lloyd, who remind us every day that Jingle All the Way is far from the worst thing Jake Lloyd starred in.
WWE Studios also announced The Marine 4, another DTV sequel where The Mix will return after starring in The Marine 3 (John Cena starred in the original and Ted DiBiase starred in The Marine 2) WWE Diva Summer Rae will also star.
This year will see WWE release the animated Scooby-Doo! WrestleMania Mystery, the Leprechaun: Origins reboot of the Leprechaun franchise (starring Hornswoggle), and See No Evil 2. The original See No Evil starred Kane and was one of WWE’s first films. The sequel is directed by the Soska sisters, Jen and Sylvia Soska, and will again see Kane go on a killing spree. No word on if Kane will kill Larry the Cable Guy, but maybe they are saving that for See No Evil 3.
[adrotate banner=”1″]Scooby-Doo and the Mystery Incorporated crew (or whatever the other characters who ride in the Mystery Machine call themselves when they’re not stoned) are back, this time investigating a mystery at WrestleMania! ZOINKS! This animated feature looks like it is in the spirit of the hour-long The New Scooby-Doo Movies episodes that featured real guest stars like Batman and Robin, Sandy Duncan, The Harlem Globetrotters, and The Addams Family. Because there will be animated versions of all your favorite wrestlers: Vince McMahon, Triple H, John Cena, Kane, The Miz, Brodus Clay, Santino Marella, Sin Cara and AJ Lee! I only know who some of them are, so if having one of them in animated form is something ridiculous, please let me know! The feature will be co-produced by WWE Studios and Warner Brothers.
When Shaggy and Scooby win tickets to WrestleMania, the entire gang travels in the Mystery Machine to WWE City to attend the epic event. However, when a mysterious ghostly bear appears and threatens to ruin the show, Scooby, Shaggy, Velma, Daphne and Fred work with WWE Superstars to solve the case.
A G-G-G-G-G-G-GHOST BEAR?????!!? Awesome.
The mystery is why the frosting is so delicious...
[adrotate banner=”1″]For some reason only known to inmates at the local nut house, Leprechaun is getting a reboot instead of another sequel. And not only is Leprechaun getting rebooted, it’s getting rebooted thanks to a deal Lionsgate is doing with WWE. The wrestling company. Because nothing says Leprechaun like WWE. Sure, the timing of this is also a tad suspect (as tomorrow is St. Patrick’s Day), but let’s forget about that for a second. WWE? Seriously? Have they made any good films?
Even better is the quote from the clueless WWE Studios head, Michael Luisi;
“We have been looking for ways to continue our relationship with Lionsgate and we saw ‘Leprechaun’ as the perfect opportunity to take a well-known franchise and put a modern-day spin on it. This is a property that we believe our audience will respond to and we continue to look for ways to surprise and engage them.”
How in the crap are they going to “put a modern-day spin” on Leprechaun? Is he going to kill people via viral videos? Will his gold be stolen by Ron Paul? And how often will he wrestle, probably for a GOLD BELT! See, this just writes itself!
I am engaged, and here is my engagement in picture form:
And let’s also mention: Upcoming films for WWE Studios include “No One Lives,” starring Luke Evans and WWE personality Brodus Clay, “Barricade,” starring Eric McCormack; and cult hit “The Day” starring “Lost” vet Dominic Monaghan, Shawn Ashmore, and Ashley Bell, which was purchased at the 2011 Toronto Film Festival.