Chinese cinema hit the news cycle recently, but not because of a new breakout hit or because another Hollywood studio added a big Chinese star for one line of a movie in order to try to get a share of their box office, but because of a movie that is basically a bootleg of a bigger budget movie. Cinemas in China will get what is basically a bootleg Warcraft film, called My Wow (aka 我的魔兽世界 which means My World of Warcraft)! My Wow is set to hit theaters before Warcraft does, and the costumes look shockingly familiar. The plot is completely different, as it features “A man gets transported to a fantasy world of warcraft, where the impossible occurs…”
So basically it’s that same story where someone gets transported into a fantasy world and becomes a hero, except this time the fantasy world looks suspiciously like World of Warcraft without actually being Warcraft. It also stars Jatfei Wong/Wong Yat-Fei, though he doesn’t play the fish out of water character. The image at the top of the article are the oddly suspicious costumes from the film.
If you bootleg fish out of water stories from China, then you might also be excited for the upcoming release of The Adventures of Panda Warrior, which is totally not Kung Fu Panda, don’t get any ideas!
A peace-loving soldier from Ancient China is magically transported into a world ruled by an evil nine-headed snake. Transformed into a panda, he joins forces with a flying pig to free the once-peaceful Merryland from tyranny. But first he must train to be the kingdom’s most courageous panda warrior.
If The Adventures of Panda Warrior seems vaguely familiar, that’s because you might have stumbled across a trailer for it when it was called The Adventures of Jinbao (大兵金宝) in 2012. Jackie Chan voices the panda, because The Adventures of Jinbao is actually a sequel to his 2010 movie Little Big Soldier. Sort of. It’s a sequel to a flash game sequel to Little Big Soldier called FLASH Little Big Soldier (FLASH大兵小將), hence following the art style for the very beginning before Jackie Chan’s character is turned into a panda. Of course, the US version trades Jackie Chan for Rob Schneider and Norm MacDonald. None of this should be confused with the other animated Kung Fu Panda ripoff, Little Panda Fighter, which is Brazilian but also awful.
Now if you want even more exciting stuff, April’s Crazy Toy City (疯狂玩具城) mysteriously has a similar poster and title to Disney’s Zootopia, known in China as Crazy Animal City (疯狂动物城). This was roundly mocked on China’s internet, though the film itself seems to have little to do with Zootopia, instead following a boy who is transported to a toy-ruled city after mistreating his toys. So maybe it’s a sequel to Toy Story?
Whatever the case, I’m sure we’ll soon have many more very original films to talk about! Now I have to go watch Hollywood’s latest reboot of a prequel of a sequel of a remake.
With that poster of impending doom, it’s time to once again launch into a news story link-o-rama!
**Welcome new TarsTarkas.NET contributor Donald Hallene!!! Donald’s work has appeared on Wag The Movie, EW has “borrowed” his tweets to use for an article, and he’s a fellow goon! Read his first article about the Pirates of the Caribbean ride and how it became influential enough to get a film! Or I will break you. Into many irregular-shaped pieces. This is not a joke!
**FourDK asks that important question, Ayna Tukhabi’un Al-Shams?
**Pre-Code is quiet, almost too quiet about All Quiet on the Western Front!
**Ninja Dixon puts an eye on The Cyclops!
**The Cultural Gutter discusses Superman and Masculinity!
**Congrats to Turkish romantic comedy Celal ile Ceren for rocketing to the bottom of the IMDB Bottom 100 list! You deserve it. From the look of the trailer, we’re now exporting Kevin Jameses across Europe!
**Once Jon Chu gets done “post-converting” GI Joe Retaliation (or whatever the fuck they’re really doing to it), he’ll be helming the adaptation of the Young Adult novel Matched by Ally Condie. It’s one of those books where in a dystopian future everyone is told what to do and one woman fights the system and rejects her arraigned marriage to do what she wants. Dystopian futures are so hot right now!
**Neil Burger will direct Shailene Woodley in Divergent, based on the Young Adult novel by Veronica Roth. Shailene Woodley is Beatrice Prior, and Evan Daugherty wrote the screenplay. It’s one of those books where in a dystopian future everyone is divided into a few factions who follow strict rules and one woman fights the system and rejects the rules to do what she wants. Dystopian futures are so hot right now!
**Marie Lu’s YA novel Legend is also headed to the big screen, with Andrew Barrer and Gabe Ferrari writing the script and Jonathan Levine directing. It’s one of those books where in a dystopian future a teenage boy Robin Hood causes trouble and a teenage girl cop hunts him down and fights the system by falling in love with him. Dystopian futures are so hot right now!
**Veronica Rossi’s YA novel Under the Never Sky has….guess what….been optioned for the big screen! It’s one of those books where in a dystopian future a teenage girl is kicked out of her domed city for fighting the syste— setting fires??!!? and has to team up with a teenage savage to avoid cannibals. Dystopian futures are so hot right now!
**Source Code and Moon director Duncan Jones will now direct the Warcraft movie, which means the Warcraft movie will now be awesome.
Trailer for Men in Suits, a documentary about performers in rubber monster suits. Lots more info here.
Kasra Farahani’s scifi short Noon joins the ever-increasing list of shorts that have been optioned for movies. There have been enough of these that it’s a trend. So get off your lazy butt and make a scifi short!!!
**We already got dueling Die Hard in the White House flicks this year, but next year we’ll have dueling Hercules movies! Aside from the Dwayne Johnson/Brett Ratner flick, Renny Harlin is making his own, which will be more Gladiator than super hero. Hercules 3D will presumably be in 3D.
Tyrannoneustes lythrodectikos is the awesome ancestor to crocodiles that needs its own SyFy flick, stat! I can just see her now, fighting the system to eat the man she loves. Metriorhynchid super-predators are so hot right now! Via
Until next time, remember there are more Baby Geniuses films coming! A lot more!