Vampire Cleanup Department (Review)
Vampire Cleanup Department
aka 救殭清道夫 aka Gao Geung Jing Dou Fu
2017
Written by Yan Pak-Wing, Ho Wing-Hong, and Ashley Cheung Yin-Kei
Directed by Chiu Sin-Hang and Yan Pak-Wing
SFFilm had their annual Hong Kong Film Festival and due to the power of having two tickets leftover from the last festival I went to see two films in this festival! This time, all the films were at the fabulous Vogue Theater, which is a bit of a headache for me to get to but at least parking around there isn’t terrible (also a skunk sprayed my car as thanks for me stopping in time to not hit him as he ran across the road, lol!) While my car now stank, Vampire Cleanup Department did not, but it wasn’t a new paradigm in Hong Kong horror comedy, either. Unfortunately it is one of those middle of the road flicks that are hard to write about, due to me not wanting to slam it too hard due to the parts that were good, but not wanting to praise it to the heavens due to the parts that were bad. It’s sort of a modern take on the Mr. Vampire flicks, except imagine if the one-eyebrowed priest was employed by the Hong Kong government in a secret department. The squad takes down vampires when they pop up, and since this is a Hong Kong film they are of the hopping variety.
We follow Tim Cheung (BabyJohn Choi Hon-Yik) as he moves from hapless schlub to member of the Vampire Cleanup Department. It helps that he is the son of two former members who were killed while on duty, his mother’s last act was giving birth to him after a vampire attack. This makes him a legacy hire but also means he’s got some vampire immunity that is explained just well enough when needed for plot purposes. As the new guy he gets all the garbage details including cleaning up the office via constant sweeping and also memorizing and making the different vampire amulets (the strips of paper with writing on them that the priests put on vampire heads to freeze them or control them.) This framework lets them follow the traditional hero’s journey arc, except with some extra films stuffed along for the ride.
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Categories: Movie Reviews Tags: BabyJohn Choi Hon-Yik, Chin Siu-Ho, Eric Tsang Chi-Wai, Hong Kong, Hopping Vampires, Lin Min-Chen, Richard Ng Yiu-Hon, Siu Yam-Yam, vampires
Big Bad Sis
Big Bad Sis
aka 沙膽英 aka Sa daam ying
1976
Written by Sze-To On
Directed by Sun Chung
Shaw Brothers gives us a tale of bad girl factory workers! It is an interesting spin on the delinquent schoolgirl approach, having the girls just out of school and holding down jobs, but still being delinquent. Big Bad Sis is an interesting hybrid, because it’s an action film with clear influences from the Japanese Sukeban/Pinky violence flicks, but it’s also a Hong Kong Triad film and manages to throw in some left wing pro-labor and pro-women’s rights issues. With just enough exploitation to satisfy those who need that as well. Big Bad Sis may be a stew made from many random ingredients, but they work together to give an entertaining flick.
Big Bad Sis shows that sometimes you gotta fight. Whether it is for your job or to protect innocent people in the bathroom or because of crazy triad gambling den drama or because your boss is a piece of garbage or all of those reasons combined into a gigantic reason. A bid bad reason, which is why you need your sisters!
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Categories: Movie Reviews, Ugly Tags: Chen Kuan-Tai, Chen Ping, Chong Lee, Hong Kong, Siu Yam-Yam, Sun Chung, Sze-To On, Wang Hsieh, Women who kick butt, Wong Chung
Golden Venom
Golden Venom
aka 金蠶降
1991HKMDB Link
Directed by Lam Yee-Hung
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Throw your hands in the air, and crystal ball like you just don’t care!
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Golden Venom is a kung fu fantasy with laser beams shooting out of people that turns into gross out horror as two families feud in non-game show format. It’s pretty uninspired at times, and I’m not sure what the real point of it was, because it isn’t enough of a gross out film to satisfy the gross out fans, but it’s not enough of a good wuxia type film to satisfy those fans, either. It’s a halfway effort that fails everyone. The only reason I watched Golden Venom is because characters were wearing crazy colored wigs and doing magic kung fu moves, but the overall plot was disappointing, the villains are generically evil, and even though I like the goofy effects, the rest of it is boring.
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Gingers do so have souls!
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Saying Golden Venom is not fond of women would be an understatement. Every female character except one is killed, many are sexually degraded, and most are just quickly killed and tossed aside. The only real strong female character is Skeleton, and she’s evil and crazy!
The only real cool thing are the villains and how outlandish they are. The almost cartoonish look seems inspired by the Golden Light Puppets, much like many of Pearl Cheung Ling’s films and other Taiwanese fantasy flicks seem to feature goofy wigs more than other countries. Even though the bad guys look like kids fantasy characters, with the nudity and grossness I doubt this is intended to be a kids flick.
The “Golden Venom” from the title is the name of the mouth laser beams. It’s poisonous and comes in different flavors unique to each family’s secret recipe. Each family also has cures, which can’t be made without the help of the family.
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Welcome to Comicon!!
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The presentation is okay, though in this print the subtitles keep changing the names of the characters. This is only a problem because some of the names are cooler than others.
Golden Venom is flawed and is too mean-spirited for my taste. I generally hope for a fun kung fu adventure, not a film walking the line towards being pure exploitation but afraid to pull the trigger. Director Lam Yee-Hung also directed a bunch of terrible Category III flicks before disappearing into the ether. After seeing Golden Venom, I’m wondering why it took so long.
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I see Starbucks has brought back the pumpkin spice latte…
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Categories: Movie Reviews, Ugly Tags: Charlie Cho Cha-Lee, Gam Chi-Gei, Hong Kong, Jue Gwan-Yeung, Ku Feng, Lam Yee-Hung, Lau Shun, Mark Cheng Ho-Nam, martial arts, Siu Yam-Yam