Get marooned again as Gilligan's Island casts away to remake land!

[adrotate banner=”1″]Everyone’s favorite television series about people stuck on an island (suck it, Lost!) is back again for the…let’s see…fourth time in movie form! We all remember the 1960s television series, because it was rerun forever and that’s how 99% of us saw all the episodes over and over again. As you are probably aware, the castaways did finally get off the island, long after the show was canceled after two seasons (not for ratings, but because of scheduling conflicts!) with the made for tv movie Rescue from Gilligan’s Island. It ended, of course, with the castaways being trapped once again. Two more tv movies followed – The Castaways on Gilligan’s Island (which was also a proposed pilot for a revised series) and The Harlem Globetrotters on Gilligan’s Island, which featured the greatest basketball game in the history of film (until Space Jam!) The actors would appear in various skits and things, but even with a reality show version of the original series, there was no real revival.

Until now.

Warner Bros. has decided to bring Gilligan’s Island back, in movie form! As a vehicle for Josh Gad. You know, the famous Josh Gad. He was in Book of Mormon, which I know thanks to reading the handy dandy Deadline article everyone is sourcing this movie news from! As a sign of quality, Warners doesn’t even bother to say which part Josh Gad will be playing. I would have though Gilligan, but Gad is tubby and that’s leading speculation that he will be the Skipper, though I can’t see Skipper being the star of Gilligan‘s Island. Josh Gad will write along with Benji Samit and Dan Hernandez.

I do hope this does lead to what we all want to see on the big screen:



Story by Chris Buck, Jennifer Lee, and Shane Morris
Screenplay by Jennifer Lee
Directed by Chris Buck and Jennifer Lee

Disney’s take on the Snow Queen tale is an overall positive experience, but I hesitate to praise Frozen as a new classic. Despite some very good twists and themes that throw some classic Disney Princess tropes on their ears, the good parts don’t transform an overall uneven story into something great. Instead, we have something that is pretty good, just not amaze-tastic.

Frozen‘s strength is in its story of sisterly love. As children, Elsa accidentally injures Anna with her snow powers, causing Anna to have part of her memories erased. Ever since, the girls grow up separate, with Elsa hiding away due to her powers, taught to fear and suppress them. Anna is forever wondering why her sister hides away, and no one bothers to just tell her what happened. After the deaths of their parents (this IS a Disney movie!), Elsa comes of age to be coronated as queen, which will be the first time the palace has been open in years.
Anna’s elation at having actual people to interact with causes her to act almost drunk with gittiness, and it helps that one of the first things she does is bump into a handsome foreign prince, Hans. Elsa’s increasingly solemn demeanor (a manifestations of her duties and her worries that her powers will be exposed in front of all the visitors) drives Anna closer to Hans, to where they become engaged that night. Elsa realizes this is crazy, and doesn’t want to give her blessing at such a quick relationship, nor have a giant wedding where more people will be around to possibly expose her powers. This leads to an argument that leads to Elsa accidentally blasting parts of the palace with her ice powers. The powers go out of control, Elsa runs for the mountains, and accidentally freezes the whole town as she flees.

Anna (Kristen Bell) – Anna goes after her sister, desperate to mend their rift, and also to help save the town, which now has a complete ice over in summer. She’s unprepared for such a harsh journey, but is motivated by her surviving memories of fun and love of her sister.
Elsa (Idina Menzel) – The newly crowned queen of Arendelle is happier being alone in the mountains, free to use her power and free from accidentally harming anyone with it.
Kristoff (Jonathan Groff) – A mountain man who runs an ice business, and lives a solitary life with his reindeer, Sven. He’s hired by Anna to take her up the mountain to the source of the cold. Their relationship starts as the typical antagonistic people from two worlds who grow together as they travel on a journey thing. Kristoff was an orphan, but was adopted by trolls (coincidentally, when he saw the young Anna be healed by trolls)
Sven (Himself) – Reindeer owned by Kristoff. Sven loves carrots and pushing Kristoff to do things. Sven does not talk, but Kristoff often has conversations to himself where he provides a voice for Sven.
Hans (Santino Fontana) – A foreign prince visiting the town for the coronation, he befriends Anna due to their shared experiences of having older siblings ignore them. He and Anna have a whirlwind romance that ends with them engaged on the day they meet. Hans is put in charge of the town after Elsa flees and Anna leaves to go find her. He does his best to take care of the frozen city, and leads an expedition to find the Queen and save Anna.
Olaf (Josh Gad) – A snowman created inadvertently by Elsa when she’s playing with her powers, Olaf resembles the snowmen built by Elsa and Anna as children. He attaches himself to Anna and her party, and is excited about everything. Olaf’s greatest wish is to experience summer, blissfully unaware as to what happens to snowmen in summer.

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Links killed the dinosaurs!

[adrotate banner=”1″]You can’t trust links, they kill everything…

**Movie critic told not to review films with strong female leads. Skip most of this rambling blog and scroll down to read the email from the guy.

snow white and the huntsman is trash. moral garbage. a lot of fuzzy feminist thinking and pandering to creepy hollywood mores produced by metrosexual imbeciles.

I don’t want to publish reviews of films where women are alpha and men are beta.

where women are heroes and villains and men are just lesser versions or shadows of females.

i believe in manliness.

**There’s gonna be a Johnny Carson biopic! John McLaughlin will write, Tom Thayer will produce and it’s going to be based off of the biography Carson The Magnificent: An Intimate Portrait by Bill Zehme book.

**Triplets has a writer! You know Triplets, the sequel to Twins, which starred Arnold Schwarzenegger and Danny DeVito as brothers, that will incorporate Eddie Murphy as a third brother. Somehow. We thought it was a joke but now Josh Gad (Book of Mormon) and Ryan Dixon are collecting a paycheck to write a script, so the joke is on us. I hope they continue the tradition of having the villain get hundreds of feet of chains dropped on his head.

**I’m still not going to report Episode VII director rumors until one is confirmed, because anything else is pointless garbage.
Bloom County Star Wars

**Dino Time 3D is a real movie opening soon!

**Support the Cultural Gutter‘s IndieGoGo or be destroyed! The Cultural Gutter lost their grant and need some $$$ to keep the lights on!

**Clown Dad.

**TarsTarkas.NET is too popular and has outgrown our shared hosting, so soon we’ll be switching to a VPS, as soon as I figure out what the heck to do to make that happen. Until then, we have to run in a crippled mode to not set off the wrath of our webhost and get suspended again.

**FourDK has become a Man Chased by a UFO!

**Can’t Stop the Movies takes Lincoln to the theater!

**3 Guys battle Piranha!

**TheVern needs to Step Up! 3D!

Until next time everyone, remember to walk the dinosaur!