[adrotate banner=”7″]Although I’ve been sick as a deformed internet cat these past few weeks, the world keeps turning, and Lifetime’s tidal wave of junk keeps churning, and out popped the trailer for Grumpy Cat’s Worst Christmas Ever, a movie that demanded to be made. By someone. Someone bad. Bad bad bad!

Thrill as a cat is exploited by its owners! Chill as Aubrey Plaza collects a paycheck. Dill pickles are good to eat, and better than this movie will be. Kill Bill will probably be on another channel if you need to surf. Still, it beats those Fred movies!

As Grumpy Cat is the only cat that looks like her, that means no cats being used as doubles. It also means a bunch of closeup shots of the cat “responding” to things happening and characters carrying around the largely immobile cat. So it will looks sort of weird. The trailer shows it to be sort of self-aware, but all of that is just the voiceover by Aubrey Plaza, so how much is ad-libbed and how much was there originally is a mystery I don’t care enough to solve.

As usual, we’ll hope for the best but expect the worst. Speaking of worst, Grumpy Cat’s Worst Christmas Ever airs Saturday, November 29th on Lifetime.

Grumpy Cat (voiced by Aubrey Plaza) is a lonely cat living in a mall pet shop. Because she never gets chosen by customers, she develops a sour outlook on life…until one day during the holidays, a very special 12-year-old girl named Chyrstal enters the pet store and falls in love with her after realizing she is the only person who can hear this unique cat talk. As the two develop a close friendship during the holiday rush, Grumpy reluctantly thwarts the kidnapping of an exotic dog she dislikes and, on Christmas Eve, rescues Chyrstal after the mall closes. Through her adventures, will Grumpy learn the true meaning of Christmas? Or will it be, in her words, the “Worst. Christmas. Ever?”

[adrotate banner=”7″]In famous exploited deformed internet cat news, Lifetime’s Grumpy Cat’s Worst Christmas Ever has a soundtrack, because Lifetime movies having official soundtracks is now a thing that happens.

Aubrey Plaza has been cast as the voice of Grumpy Cat, because easy paychecks are the best paychecks. After all, Bill Murray did it!

Grumpy Cat (voiced by Aubrey Plaza) is a lonely cat living in a mall pet shop. Because she never gets chosen by customers, she develops a sour outlook on life…until one day during the holidays, a very special 12-year-old girl named Chyrstal enters the pet store and falls in love with her after realizing she is the only person who can hear this unique cat talk. As the two develop a close friendship during the holiday rush, Grumpy reluctantly thwarts the kidnapping of an exotic dog she dislikes and, on Christmas Eve, rescues Chyrstal after the mall closes. Through her adventures, will Grumpy learn the true meaning of Christmas? Or will it be, in her words, the “Worst. Christmas. Ever?”

Wait, wait, wait. “CHYRSTAL”??? I hate this movie more than I thought I could.

Anyway, here are the track listings:

1. Its Hard To Be A Cat On Christmas
2. Sleigh Ride
3. Jingle Bells
4. Up On The Housetop
5. Deck The Halls
6. Worst Time Of Year
7. Christmastime Again
8. Carol Of The Bells
9. Holiday Bells
10. Christmas Honey
11. All I Want For Christmas (Is My Two Front Teeth)
12. White Christmas
13. Grumpcracker Medley
14. A Very Grumpy Christmas

Will there be a Grumpcracker scene? Or is it just a cute name? We will find out soon enough. Too soon, some may say.

Grumpy Cat’s Worst Christmas Ever airs Saturday, November 29, on Lifetime.

via Lifetime

Also here is Grumpy Cat driving a car in the movie for some reason:

[adrotate banner=”1″] What will undoubtedly be the worst cat-themed Christmas movie of the season now has an official celebrity voice for said cat, in that Lifetime’s Grumpy Cat’s Worst Christmas Ever has signed on internet meme movie veteran Aubrey Plaza as the voice of Grumpy Cat. Perhaps she’s planning to get her Bill Murray on and get the talking cat film out of the way as soon as possible!

The cable network said the movie, which (vp original movies Arturo) Interian describes as “a little Home Alone and a little Die Hard,” would also feature cameos from other famous Internet memes.

No word still on which deformed internet cats being exploited by their owners for financial gain will also costar. Nor what obnoxious internet personalities will appear. Basically, this movie will turn the audience grumpy and just become hot garbage. But I strive to be objective until it airs, then I can hate it all I want!

Shockingly, Aubrey Plaza wasn’t the first choice for Grumpy Cat. Originally they wanted Jane Lynch for the role, and she was going to do it, but now they’re blaming her winning an Emmy for her turning it down. Sure. Whatever. Or maybe she didn’t need to collect a modest paycheck thanks to all that Glee bank and she was never really attached.

It’s not a wonderful life for Grumpy Cat, the Internet meme sensation with nearly six million Facebook friends! The infamous kitty, with the naturally, but endearing sad looking facial expression, will star in her very own live-action Christmas movie, “Grumpy Cat’s Worst Christmas Ever,” premiering November 29 at 8/7c.

In “Grumpy Cat’s Worst Christmas Ever,” Grumpy Cat is a lonely cat living in a mall pet shop. Because she always gets passed over and never gets chosen by customers, this kitty develops a sour outlook on life until…one day during the holidays, a very special 12-year-old girl named Chyrstal enters the pet store and falls in love with Grumpy Cat. A unique friendship is formed between the two when Chyrstal finds she is the only person who can hear this unique feline talk. In the middle of the holiday rush, Grumpy reluctantly thwarts the kidnapping of an expensive exotic dog she can’t stand and rescues Chyrstal after the mall closes on Christmas Eve. Will Grumpy Cat learn the true meaning of Christmas, or will it be in Grumpy’s words, “Worst. Christmas. Ever?”

In the last year and a half, Grumpy Cat, whose real name is Tardar Sauce, has arguably become the most famous cat of all time. The adorable Internet celebrity was named the most influential cat by MSNBC, most important cat by Mashable and Buzzfeed, and has appeared in news and television shows around the world. She is the author of A Grumpy Book, currently in print in 14 languages, and has a second book coming out this August. Grumpy Cat has numerous merchandising deals and is Friskies official ‘Spokescat.’

Grumpy Cat’s Worst Christmas Ever airs November 29 on Lifetime.