Revenge of the Zebra Miniskirt Police (Review)

Revenge of the Zebra Miniskirt Police

aka Zebura Minisuka Porisu no Gyakushuu aka ゼブラミニスカポリスの逆襲

Directed by Nishiumi Kenichiro

Revenge of the Zebra Miniskirt Police is a spinoff prequel to Zebraman 2. In the future of 2024, Tokyo is a crime-ridden cesspool, but Governor Kouzo has just come to power and has turned the town into Zebra City. He’s formed Zebra Police to clear the streets of criminals (and anyone else) with lethal force during Zebra Time, and just because we need to get 1000% more fascist, now Governor Kouzo is setting up his personal bodyguards, the Zebra Miniskirt Police!

The Zebra Miniskirt Police are three chicks in identical miniskirt uniforms that are way more fetish-driven than the normal fascist police military industrial complex uniforms used by the rest of the Zebra Police. Their black skirts are so short you see their white panties when they kick, because the black uniforms with white panties are zebra stripes…I guess. It’s hard to say that it’s symbolism, because Revenge of the Zebra Miniskirt Police is way more black and white than Zebraman 2 (pun both intended and not intended), but the uniform designs are probably from the parent film Zebraman 2 and not this spinoff. In any event, I’ve mentioned white panties often enough I’ll probably get some weird Google referrals. Hello, pervos, welcome to the site!

This is an origin film for the Zebra Miniskirt Police, because that is a story that demanded to be told. By someone. His name is Jerry. Go bother him. The three actresses chosen to star got the roles through a reality television series where Zebraman himself, Show Aikawa, choose the three women from 776 applicants. Thus they are mostly unknown models who have done little and will probably continue to do so.

Being a low budget direct to video affair, it shows blatantly. The makeup and production values are not up to par to the original film. The video even looks different, as it was shot on a different type of camera. Most of the money seemingly went into the action choreography, which is never a bad thing. The film is helmed by Nishiumi Kenichiro – Miike’s assistant director on Zebraman 2, but while Miike could have turned this low budget affair into something fun and excessive, Nishiumi Kenichiro plays it more straight and similar to a lot of the low-budget Japanese flicks I’ve seen in tone and in content. I don’t know if that was the order, or if Kenichiro just hasn’t learned enough from Miike. It basically turns into one of the hundreds of direct to video Japanese films produced each year for specific fetish audiences, this one for those who like seeing women beat up and have large bruise makeup all over them. That’s the only reason I can figure for the excessive bruise makeup. The tone is a mix of the depressing Cool Dimension and the blatant exploitation of Sukeban Fighter Misaki.

And once again, at TarsTarkas.NET, we don’t need no stinking subtitles!

Yumi Kisaragi (Miki Inase) – a former rebel cell member, whose group fought against the Governor’s power grabs. She lived as a poor girl in the slum with a bad attitude and computer hacking skills. Before all that, she had happy parents who were killed by the Zebra Police
Risako Yuki (Sayoko Ohashi) – Zebra Miniskirt Police recruit who is out to revenge a friend. Sayoko Ohashi is a model best known for appearing in the video game Need for Speed: ProStreet.
Yu Maki (Yuko Shimizu) – Zebra Minkskirt Police recruit who gets almost no characterization at all. And I can’t find any information on Yuko Shimizu, because she has the same name as the lady who created Hello Kitty!
Governor Aihara Kouzo (Guadalcanal Taka) – The crazed governor who converts Tokyo into Zebra City. Dresses like every day is Halloween!

Yumi Kisaragi is living it up in the slums as a computer hacker before she’s arrested and thrown in a training camp with two other girls – Risako Yuki and Yu Maki. Training and brainwashing and depression of captivity and the ultimate defeat of their spirits await the girls. You know, fun stuff! First they’ll watch A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila until their brains turn to mush, then they’ll meet Tila Tequila until the last bits of their spirits die, and then Tila Tequila makes a sex tape with their dead spirits and posts it on the internet.

Yumi attempts an escape, even shooting Risako in the shoulder when confronted, though Yumi throws up immediately
and is recaptured. Yu Maki reveals that she and Risako are there primarily to help avenge their friend who was raped. At least they avoided the “we were raped ourselves so now are kick ass chicks” trope. Because that trope can go suck a lemon…IN HELL! These girls are just as much victims as everyone else in this society, growing up poor and destitute in the slums, or having their happy lives taken from them. We don’t need an extra layer of rape revenge thrown in to satisfy some dumb subsection of the audience. For once, I support something that happens in a Japanese exploitation film!

The three girls train and graduate to Zebra Mini Skirt Police, and guard the Governor himself. But the facility is attacked and Yumi is captured by rebels – the very same rebel group she used to belong to! The other two burst in and save her. This leads to a long combat sequence that shows where the entire production budget went. For a ~40 minute film, you should try to avoid having the best part be in a small enough chunk to put up on YouTube!

In fact, this whole sequence is basically an exercise in Yumi learning to commit violence without throwing up. They even transpose shots of her birthday party as a child with the shots of her committing violent acts on her former allies to show her rebirth as a Zebra Miniskirt Police. She has achieved a new life.

Which would sort of be ironic if she ended up killing the Governor because he became out of favor. Which she does in Zebraman 2. Except her part in that flick is fleeting, and we don’t know what happens next. The Zebra Miniskirt Police are never seen again, not even in ZebraQueen’s entourage (unless I missed them…), so we never know if Yumi reclaims her original life, or if she is some sort of undirected violent instrument, or if she just falls in line to protect the next regime in power. The mystery is annoying. The blandness of Revenge of the Zebra Miniskirt Police is annoying. Everything is annoying. This film is a disservice to Zebraman 2. Don’t bother tracking it down.

Rated 3/10 (The error is the film, SYMBOLISM!!!, I’m a cop I wear a badge!)

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