Posts tagged "Olga Kurylenko"

A Vampire Academy sequel will happen if YOU open your wallet!

Do you like throwing your money at YA franchises that failed to make it at the box office? Well, Vampire Academy has an offer for you! Despite Vampire Academy not setting the box office afire (or even creating sparks!), Vampire Academy is following in the YA franchise tradition of going ahead with an ill-advised sequel that will lose money. But there’s a twist! The twist is YOU will make up the difference, thus the rich producers will not lose any money, and the Real Fans will feel more involved. It’s win-win, unless you are an innocent bystander, like I am.

As the Facebook Announcement says:

We are excited to announce that we have raised the majority of our funds for FROSTBITE – but there is one small catch (we told you this wouldn’t be easy)…We need proof that the fans truly want to see the franchise continue. And so, we will be launching a crowd funding campaign and putting the power in your hands. More details to come later this week.

So, ‪#‎VAFamily‬ – Are you ready to make history? ‪#‎Frostbite2015‬

No word on if everyone will be back, but I’m thinking thanks to the magic of contractual obligations you can expect everyone. Will this go down the road of the bomb Percy Jackson 2, or the upcoming Mortal Instruments sequel that was delayed because of how bad Mortal Instruments: City of Bones did? We shall see…

Until then, start saving your pennies, because you need to throw money at this failed franchise instead of throwing money at all those other projects posted by actual independent struggling artists!

Vampire Academy Poster

How about “They suck at sequels!”?

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Posted by Tars Tarkas - July 17, 2014 at 1:27 am

Categories: Movie News   Tags: , , , , , , , , , , ,

Empires of the Deep hits trailer, and what a glorious trailer it is…


For me to POOP ON! Empires of the Deep is a $130 million China coproduction that looked like it would be a turd from their overblown “3D” press junket announcing the fiasco to the inexperienced Chinese new rich investors looking to buy their own under the sea Avatar to the parade of directors the film went through (Jonathan Lawrence, then Catwoman director Pitof, and finally Michael French, unless he got replaced because I stopped caring who is in charge now), the whole thing has been a giant megadisaster of SyFy original movie proportions.

Empires of the Deep is the ego trip of Jon Jiang, one of the richest men in China thanks to his real estate deals that you can be assured are 100% on the up and up. Reality cannot stand in the way of realty, thus Jon Jiang decided he wanted to be the best movie maker ever! Thus, he dreamed up the ultimate movie adventure, a Greek tale about a dude who falls in love with a mermaid and also there is a giant fish war. In spectacular 3-D!

The fantasy adventure, set in ancient Greece, tells about a young man’s adventure in the undersea mermaid kingdom in order to save his father, while encountering ferocious sea monsters and gets involved in large-scale battles in the seabed between mermaids, monsters and demons. Kurylenko plays the Queen of the Mermaid Empire and stars opposite lead actor Steve Polites and Chinese actress Yanfei Shi.

Maxx Maulion is also in this flick, he’s familiar to the citizens of SomethingAwful’s Cinema Discusso forum when he popped in to promote his flick Tony Tango, which makes this film even weirder.

As you can see from the trailer, they totally got their $130 million worth! I hope whoever stole the $115 million that wasn’t spent on the effects is enjoying his vacation on the tropical island.

Empires of the Deep
Empires of the Deep
That sounds Unawesome!

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Posted by Tars Tarkas - October 23, 2012 at 11:08 pm

Categories: Movie News   Tags: , , , , , , , , ,