The Stalker Club (Review)

The Stalker Club

The Stalker Club Lifetime
2017
Written by Barbara Kymlicka
Directed by Doug Campbell

The Stalker Club Lifetime
Lifetime does slashers! Throw in a dash of The Internet Will Murder You, toss in a pile of stalking, and pour in a bunch of actual person in a mask killing teens with a knife, then blend it together and top it with a “Lifetime” cherry, and you got The Stalker Club, which proves that Lifetime movies can be any genre they want. For those of you thinking an actual slasher movie would be out of place on Lifetime, this network consistently puts out films with high body counts and crazed obsessives following around innocent teens, this is the natural progression!
The Stalker Club Lifetime
The Stalker Club opens with a riff on the opening of Scream except the masked stalker doesn’t speak and the 80s girl dies by falling down the stairs while hinting she sort of knows whats going on. But it’s too late for her and too late for us because the rest of the film takes place 30 years later! Modern day opens with a montage of the five main teen characters doing a slow-motion cool walk complete with a name title cards for each one, a handy thing to do to get you up to speed with the characters quickly so the stalking and the clubbing can begin. We got Ashley (Kelcie Stranahan), our heroine; Darren (JT Neal), Ashley’s handsome boyfriend; Chloe (Alex Frnka), the bad girl who channels Denise Richards; Mark (Paul Karmiryan), the jock who likes to joke; and Sadie (Lora McHugh), the sensitive goth. The clique is sort of weird because Chloe and Mark are the popular kids, while Darren is new to school and befriended Mark, while Sadie is presented as Chloe’s best friend but doesn’t seem to fit at all. Ashley is the newest one of the group, Chloe doesn’t seem to like her and Ashley has basically abandoned all her former friends to hang out with this cool crowd. Ashley also is mad at her mom (Maeve Quinlan) for daring to have a boyfriend when it’s only been two years since her dad died in a car accident. Seriously, Ashley takes some warming up to before we don’t wish she gets stalked to death.
The Stalker Club Lifetime
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Double Daddy (Review)

Double Daddy

Double Daddy
2015
Story by Alan Donahue
Screenplay by Barbara Kymlicka
Directed by Lee Friedlander

Double Daddy
A teenage boy knocks up not one, but two separate teenage girls. No, this isn’t an episode of Jerry Springer, it’s the Lifetime Channel! Double Daddy is the name, and if you guessed that one of the teenage girls was a crazy stalker, you get double gold stars! This film has all the makings of a kooky classic, but stops just short of greatness. Instead, we’ll have to settle for some ridiculous cheese, social media goofiness, and a gold digger who is ever in search of the ultimate selfie.

Popular kid Connor (Cameron Palatas) is throwing the ultimate high school bash right before the start of senior year, and he’s chug-a-lugged full of beers. His girlfriend Amanda (Mollee Gray) has been away all summer earning money for college, which is bad for him and bad for her, as Heather (Brittany Curran) also as her eyes on Connor, and manages to get him into his dad’s Mercedes and out of his clothes. Despite being drunk as a skunk, Connor does tell her “no” a few times, meaning he is basically raped in this scene. The movie doesn’t address that at all, Connor can barely remember anything, and Heather’s plan was to get knocked up and land herself a rich sugar daddy, so she’s not going to reveal the truth.
Double Daddy
As the school year starts, Amanda is back in town and excited to finally see Connor, who is distracted for some odd reason… Amanda is less than thrilled that strange girl Heather is saying “Hi” to Connor in the halls, and even less thrilled when Heather posts a selfie of Connor and her in the Mercedes online. This being high school, the photo spreads like wildfire, and quickly followed by the next one, a photo of Heather and a positive pregnancy test. As an aside, during one of the many selfies she takes, she puts the pregnancy test in her mouth. Ewwww! Connor has to admit his infidelity and now he is single.
Double Daddy
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