Tag Archives: DTV sequels

DTV sequel news – Road Trip 2, Mean Girls 2

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[adrotate banner=”1″]DTV sequels coming up from Paramount’s Paramount Famous Productions (the company they made just to do DTV sequels) include Without a Paddle 2, Mean Girls 2, Road Trip 2: Beer Pong, Grease 3, The Naked Gun 4, and a new Bad News Bears (about soccer? WTF?)

The story of Road Trip 2: Beer Pong is it was originally a script entitled Beer Pong that was bought and presumably had the “Road Trip” portion added onto it. As long as it has an extended locker room sequence then I won’t call it an abomination, just stupid. Moviehole read some of the script:

the story sees a college student named Andy egged on by his rascally friends to stop worrying so much about his girlfriend back-home and start enjoying college life to the full. So he does. And meets a ‘Beer Pong’ model named Jenna. He becomes rather besotted.

Unfortunately, the girlfriend decides to transfer to Andy’s university so she can be closer to him – and on all days, the day he and his friends have decided to hit the road chasing Jenna and her model friends in their big-ass tour bus.

All that plus beer pong. American Pie Presents Band Camp director Steve Rash is helming, and it stars Preston Jones, Nestor Aaron Absera, Danny Pudi, Julianna Guill and Julia Levy-Boeken (with reported DJ Qualls cameo)

Naked Gun 4 has a great overview of the script up at AICN, so read that if you are curious.

No actual news on Mean Girls 2’s plot yet, but Paramount Famous Productions head Louis Feola said he wouldn’t make DTV sequels for Top Gun or The Godfather, so put down your pitchforks….for now!

(And don’t worry, American Pie 7 is coming out also, called American Pie: The Book of Love!)
The new Grease film is still only at the planning stages.
This is far too much DTV sequel news for me to stand, so we’ll end here.

Direct to Video News – Jaws Edition

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[adrotate banner=”1″]Rumors are swirling that a DTV sequel to JAWS (!!!) is being considered. Supposedly, Jaws 5 will be made direct to your video store…or will it?

The Rumor:

… You reboot the franchise. Look at what Warners is doing with Superman and Batman and Sony are doing with Bond. It’s hardly comparable, being a fucking rubber shark monster, but what the hell. You forget that Jaws 3 and Jaws 4 were ever made. You bring Brody back. Only this time he’s totally fucking frazzled from the shock of what he’s gone through twenty odd years ago. He’s an old man, he’s alcholic and he’s fucking emotionally broke. His son’s live away, his wife’s dead and he’s about to be forcibly retired from Amity’s police department after decades. Then a shark comes back, starts doing it’s shit and Brody pulls himself together and decides that catching and killing the shark will be his salvation. They didn’t like this. They were all about the “It sounds dark!” “It sounds unmarketable in the avenue we’re considering!” They started talking to me about the straight-to-DVD market being for the teens and primarily young males/females and that they were wanting to focus more on that. One guy says “You know? Teens in peril? That sort of thing?” I reply “You mean like Jaws 2?” Another tells me that Schieder wouldn’t touch anything remotely linked to Jaws sequels. They said that back in the early 80s they nearly sued him because he was contracted to 2 sequels and he did one and refused the other and they got round it in the end by him letting them use his stuff in Jaws 4 but not having to pay him a dime! It doesn’t look likely for me. Then again my agent is telling me that I was 20th down the line from being offered it so it seems fucking nobody wants to touch it…

Sounds awful, right? This is another horror movie where the true horror is it’s existence.

Suddenly, the horror waned as soon as it cast its shadow…

Allow me to debunk. I dropped an email to David Linde to ask if this was true, and he said folks are confused: there’s an HD “Jaws” DVD on its way, but no “Jaws 5” straight-to-DVD.

And if you can’t believe Universal’s top brass, who can you believe?

Silent Bob (Kevin Smith) is good at being silent, and now is good at silencing odd rumors.

Unless the studio lied to him.

do do do do, do do do do…..
jaws

Sequel News – The Good, The Bad, and the Fugly!

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[adrotate banner=”1″]Sequels continue to sprawl across the video store shelves like housing developments outside major cities. And like many of those, they are gated off and isolated from the real world, causing horrible developments to be made. Still, sometimes movies that actually deserve it get some extra adventures!

The Good:

Harold and Kumar 2 has been given the go (finally!) Harold and Kumar travel to Amsterdam so Harold can join with Maria, but Kumar is mistaken for a terrorist. Thus the Department of Homeland Security chases then from Guantanamo Bay through the Deep South. No confirming word on if NPH will re-cameo, but hopefully so, as he is rumored to be.

Wallace and Gromit sequel! – After Aardman split from those idiots at Dreamworks, they can get back to making good movies, and Wallace and Gromitt 2 will be awesomely awesome, like the first.

The Departed 2 – rumors of this getting a sequel are hitting high, but it won’t be based on either the sequel or prequel to Infernal Affairs, the HK flick The Departed is based on.

The Bad:

The Prince & Me III – Why is there ANOTHER one of these?????? Still no Julia Stiles, even though she’s not doing much better in the real acting department!

Bachelor Party 2 – Based on a script by Jay Longino, the sequel follows Ron, who’s been engaged to his fiancée Melinda after only knowing her for a couple months. Ron gets treated to the ultimate bachelor party in Florida, courtesy of Melinda’s brother-in-law Todd, in an attempt to sabotage his relationship with Melinda. Fully ready to party but determined to remain true to Melinda, Ron must endure temptation after temptation if he wants to remain engaged. Poor Ron. Poor us. Will there be donkeys? That’s all I want to know. DTV, of course.

RETURN TO HAUNTED HILL – Another DTV mess, capitalizing on the horror DTV trend. Will be lame, like the original remake, but not the original Price film, if you were lucky enough to see it in theaters when a glow in the dark skeleton was flown over the audience. I was several decades away from being born, so I missed out.

NEW JACK CITY 2 – another DTV sequel. Ho-hum

The Ugly:

Lost Boys 2 – Hey, let’s do surfing vampires in San Diego! NO! DTV of course.

Vengeance of Cleopatra Wong – With Gary Daniels. Gary Daniels. GARY DANIELS! (sequel to Cleopatra Wong)

PINK PANTHER 2 – This will hit theaters, with Steve Martin. I weep.

The more life goes on, the more sequels movies will get. That closing line sucks, but so do many of these sequels!

MONKEY CARDS TRICK

Why not?