Posts tagged "Bridgette B"

Monster of the Nudist Colony (Review)

Monster of the Nudist Colony

2014
Written by James Rogers and Bruno Kennedy
Directed by Louis DeWalnut (as Steve Goldenberg)

Even the Monster is nude!

Monster of the Nudist Colony blends monsters and softcore sex mayhem into a wondrous combination that’s now available on your local premium cable channel. Monster of the Nudist Colony is a direct parody of The Beast that Killed Women, directed by schlock exploitation master Barry Mahon! Not only have I seen the film, but the Something Weird DVD paired with The Monster of Camp Sunshine was the first Something Weird DVD I ever bought. If you’ve never seen the various nudie cutie films of the 1960s, filmed back when it was legal to film naked people only on a nudist colony, and with nothing frontal below the waist, then prepared to be bored silly (example: Nude on the Moon) There are endless shots of people walking (with strategically placed towels), sitting (with strategically placed towels), and playing games like volleyball (with strategically placed towels!) The Beast that Killed Women shook up the formula a bit by adding a monster killing women (Barry Mahon in a gorilla suit) that substituted for the sexual release that endless shots of nudists playing volleyball would not deliver. In a way, it was one of the Roughies, the name for underground nudie flicks made soon after the exodus from the colonies that had increasingly violent edges (an example we’ve covered is In Hot Blood)

How does a gorilla know how to tie knots so well?

Thankfully, Monster of the Nudist Colony avoids all that violent stuff. The guy in a gorilla suit may gank women, but only to tie them up and make them dance for him! Honestly, it makes the film better, because this is supposed to be a silly parody, we don’t need violent acts perpetrated against women with what may be subtextual racism getting in the way! If anything, Monster of the Nudist Colony is a little too on the nose for it’s subject, to the point where it runs out of plot and fills the last 15 minutes with an all star super orgy. That certainly has the ending dance party seen on subpar animated films beat! If you pay attention, there is plenty of references to nudie flicks: people walking along nature trails with towels, a character who’s totally anti-nudity until they learn to cut loose and be nude, something threatening the security of the nudist colony, and even the occasional visit from law enforcement. What is different is all the sex sex sex! Nudie cuties weren’t allowed to have sex scenes, and official nudist colonies shy away from the sexual aspect of nudity, focusing on freedom. Monster of the Nudist Colony ignores all that and has Circle Double D’s Nudist Colony basically one step away from Hedonism II! Sidenote: the Double D’s Nudist Colony is filmed at the Malibu Dry Gulch Ranch.

And, sorry bigfoot-human sex scene fans, the Monster does not have sex with any women until he has been returned to human form. You might like Sweet Prudence & the Erotic Adventure of Bigfoot instead!

The Librarian from Top Secret!, the prequel!

The film features extensive soundtrack work by RooBiE BreastNuT, not only working through the majority of their songs available on iTunes, but featuring a few news ones (including on that sounds written specifically for Monster of the Nudist Colony!) There is even a cameo by Roobie Breastnut herself! While fan favorite song “Pussy Pussy Bang Bang” is not used, you can hear: “I Want Your Love”, “Girls Like Girls”, “This is the Lust”, “Johnny Lapdance”, “Yeah, That’s Triple X”, “Porn to Be Alive”, “Peeping Jon”, “Hypnotika”, “Dance Dance Dance”, “Nudist Camp”, “Suck on This” and many more that can be found on Roobie Breastnut’s iTunes page!

Director Louis DeWalnut is a pseudonym for Steve Goldenberg, who has worked with Jim Wynorski on several of his softcore adventures. The writing is credited to James Rogers (I couldn’t figure out his prior credits) and Bruno Kennedy (co-writer of some of the Busty Cop movies)

What do you mean, you don’t think Ferris Bueller and Cameron Frye are the same person???

	Arch Hammer (Frankie Cullen) – Detective Arch Hammer is totally against being naked, but is totally for solving mysteries. Thus this mystery at the nudist colony disturbs him, but he can’t deny his police mentality, and goes in search of the mysterious Monster. There, he encounters a world he never knew, and if he ever drops his pants, will become part of that world. But will he?
	Mary Hammer (Melessia Hayden as Melissa Jacobs) – Arch’s wife, who is a bit more of a free spirit than him. So free she disregards things like marriage vows! But it’s all good in the land of naked sex orgies…
	Lucy (Angie Savage) – Lucy runs the nudist colony because the owner is missing and it’s also her job. She doesn’t discriminate, she has sex with the employees and the customers!
	Heather (Lexi Belle) – Nudist club member who has fun time relationships with some of the other members, and attracts the attention of the Monster.
	Joe (Ryan McLane) – Nudist club member who has a way with women. He’s sort of a jerk who keeps pushing Heather aside to run away faster from the Monster, and later puts the moves on Dana.
	Mike (TJ Cummings) – The porter at the nudist colony who gets luggage and makes drinks and has sex with everyone. The SoftcoreReviews boards said this might be TJ Cummings’ last softcore film!
	Dana (Bridgette B.) – Nudist club member who enjoys sunning herself, music, and sex.
	Tina (Samantha Ryan) – Nudist club member who is makeout friends with Dana. Captured by the Monster and forced to dance.
	Kerry (Britney Young) – Nudist club member who has a thing for Mike, which she expresses physically.
	Monster (Rickey Ricardo Smith) – The mysterious monster who terrorizes the camp by spying on all the sex going on, and occasionally stealing women for dance parties. Phases in and out of being human while the ladies dance. May or may not be connected to the missing heir Jonah Trout, who was put under an ancient Indian curse.
	Jonah Trout (Tony Marino) – Oh, that guy.
	Bonnie (Hannah Reilly) – Brunette woman who is walking in the woods with Crystal that enjoys a good argument and a good woods lesbian sex session.
	Crystal (Amber Ashlee) – Blonde woman who is walking in the woods with Bonnie that also enjoys a good argument and a good woods lesbian sex session.
	Cop (Roobie Breastnut) – A visiting cop who stops by to let the nudist crew know they need to lay off all orgies while monster reports are running rampant!
	Tennis Fan (Bailey Beetleman) – It’s a guy who looks more like what the average nudist colony member looks like. And he likes tennis! Bailey Beetleman also produced.
	Creepy Squirrel Puppet (himself) – These woods carry unspeakable horror. You don’t want to know! Stay on the marked paths.

She’s secretly the Hamburglar!

The Devil Wears Nada (Review)

The Devil Wears Nada

2009
Written and directed by Jim Wynorski (as Salvadore Ross)

They’re checking each other for cavities!

Now this is some Jim Wynorski treasure! The Devil Wears Nada is a fantastic achievement of fun story and sexy content, while still being ridiculous and creative. Wynorski can produce magic if he’s into it, and from the creativity he gives behind and in front of the camera, you can tell he’s having a ball here

The Devil Wears Nada takes its name (obviously) from The Devil Wears Prada, and here we also have an overbearing boss at a fashion magazine lording over her newest assistant. Things go a bit further here, Julia Crimson is far worse of a boss than Miranda Priestley. The humiliation becomes more sexual, though Candy seems to have no problem having sex with her boss or a random male model even under threat of termination. It is revealed that Julia Crimson is blackmailing another character (via more sexual humiliation – incriminating photos) and gets a comeuppance that we never saw in the Glenn Close film. Turning the boss into more of a caricature does make things more fun and removes a bit of moral ambiguity.

I work how many hours and all I get is a lamp???

The Devil Wears Nada gives another chance to go over the themes of its inspiration movie, with the overworked assistant at a magazine dealing with a nightmare boss and the promise of future rewards if she just sticks through all the crap she has to go through. Thanks to the job market in the US imploding, the scenario plays out like a lot of the unpaid internships that seems to be more of the rule than exception at magazines. These internships are often just unpaid 60 hour workweek jobs in expensive cities that only the rich can afford to go through, creating an artificial barrier in the magazine industry. These internships have become increasingly controversial and are technically illegal in some areas, but persist. In addition, they are often defended by those that have gone through them as a necessary part of magazine production, creating a self-feeding destructive cycle that causes many in the industry to turn a blind eye to its own failings (as rocking the boat might just cost your your job in a very competitive field!)

The Devil Wears Prada deals with the struggle that professional women tangle with, their careers or their personal lives. The Devil Wears Nada is of the opinion that you can have your cake and eat it too, and the terrible boss is just an obstacle to overcome. Candy’s defeat of Julia Crimson (and subsequent promotion to co-boss along with former assistant Becca Saperstein) is a result of playing by Julia’s own rules, but turning them around, and is accomplished by the various people Julia Crimson has wronged banding together. When Prada was released, it featured a lot of backlash from former employees of Anna Wintour condemning the book as a mean-spirited gotcha, and that author Lauren Weisberger did not appreciate the opportunities the job presented her. This circling the wagons to defend treating employees terribly is not conductive to a good business environment, and makes the defenders look like they need to justify their own abuse (and is mirrored by the aforementioned unpaid internship defenses!) Nada‘s rejects this in favor of a socialistic workers utopia where the workers team up with a money man to eliminate strife and bring peace to the land (and get rewarded!) Not only does this unionization bring strength to the workers, but Julia Crimson is such a threat that people team together regardless of class affiliation to eliminate her as a problem. Nada offers a vision where hard work and creativity are rewarded, and by working together more is accomplished than everyone suffering separately. In this spirit, Nada defeats Prada in the messaging.

But The Devil Wears Nada is not without its own problems. Candy is coerced into sexual relations in order to save her job, and male characters such as the model Michael are willing participants. And as mentioned, Candy and Becca’s eventual winning of the editors-in-chief job is awarded by a male money man, showing that despite all their work, things still resolve because a male decides. If these tradeoffs are enough to keep Nada as a strong and smart women get ahead film, or if they condemn it to an also-ran status is up to the viewer. I feel that Nada sends more postive messages than negative, and this is doubly so considering it is in the softcore genre, a section of film where far too often women are just treated as objects.

Colonel Sanders’ French impressionist painter cousin Pierre Sanders!

The cast list for The Devil Wears Nada is abysmal, with many people going uncredited. Luckily powerfred at SoftcoreReviews (NSFW link – http://www.sreviews.com/smf/index.php?topic=4619.0 ) confirmed most of the unlisted actresses (with some help from Jim!) So enjoy the mostly complete credits. Some actresses are unknown, and many characters don’t have spoken names. Wynorski packed The Devil Wears Nada to the gills with hot chicks, almost doubling the average cast size for one of these softcore flicks.

	Candy Cane (Christine Nguyen) – The newest assistant for Editor in chief Julia Crimson, and unaware just what she is getting into. Candy deals with Julia’s increasingly demented demands that play havoc on her personal life. Eventually, Candy learns to be cutthroat enough to survive, and to play her own game of dirty.
	Julia Crimson (Beverly Lynne) – Editor in chief of Lacy Lady Magazine, everyone calls her the Devil in case you forget where the inspiration comes from. Likes to dominate her employees in all aspects, usually by humiliating them verbally and sexually.
	Becca Saperstein (Brandin Rackley) – Julia’s former assistant who brings in Candy Cane to help replace her, so she can finally move on to more advanced jobs. All of Becca’s prior replacements have all quit or been fired. Helps Candy when she can.
	Sydney (Jim Wynorski as Franklin Pangborn III) – The world-worn director of most of the photoshoots, has to deal not only with temperamental models but also with Julia Crimson. Somehow still enjoys his job. Is played by an uncredited Jim Wynorski in a brilliant move.
	Frankie (Kevin Van Doorslaer) – Candy’s boyfriend, who is angry that she has to work at a job and sometimes can’t get out of things, but somehow keeps making reservations and buying expensive tickets instead of learning to wing it. Is not exactly faithful.
	Raoul Dibbens (Chris De Christopher) – Publisher of Lacy Lady Magazine, but he’s only the money man and Julia runs the show. She also has compromising photos of him.
	Michael (Frankie Cullen) – Model who is doing a shoot for the magazine and gets roped into Julia’s sex games with Candy. Is not fond of Julia, but goes along with things until Candy bucks the system, the goes along with her.
	Binky (himself) – The bird on Sydney’s cane who becomes a major character because that’s how The Devil Wears Nada rolls!

	Paula and Veronica (Katy Magnuson and “Jane Doe”) – Paula and Veronica have a battle over a bikini that ends with a lot of nude making out. Because that’s how models roll.
	Three Distracted Models (Ahryan Astyn, Bridgette B, and Codi Carmichael) – Three models who cause problems by not showing up on time to photoshoots, because they are lost. Only one of them got a name – Codi Carmichael as Rusty.
	Opening Sequence Models (Lexi Marie and Jaymie Langford) – Two models in the opening scene of the movie with all the special effects of Hell that get them all horned up for each other.

Don’t read ahead in the script if you don’t want to be spoiled on what the Devil is really wearing!

	The Actual Weirdest Giant Monster Movies Ever Made
	Superman (Telugu)
	The 113 Must See Flicks From the American Film Market 2013
	Sweet Prudence & the Erotic Adventure of Bigfoot
	March of Godzilla Island
	Let the Bullets Fly
	I Married a Monster From Outer Space
	“They Look Like They Make Sense, Don’t They?” – A Reassessment of Prometheus
	James Band 007

Posts tagged "Bridgette B"