Culture Wars

The Life Zone – anti-abortion pro-rape pro-Satan propoganda!

The Life Zone is the latest magnum opus from New Jersey state Senate candidate and ex-judge Kenneth Del Vecchio (O.B.A.M. Nude), this time it is a cross between Saw, The Twilight Zone, and mental illness. Real mental illness, not a movie called “Mental Illness”.

The plot involves three pregnant women kidnapped from abortion clinics who wake up in a jail, the only other person there is their jailer Robert Loggia who shows up via video, and a female obstetrician who will deliver their babies whether they want to or not. The women are forced to discuss their pregnancies as an “abortion thinktank”, while at night they are tortured by bad dreams – along with the doctor, who has flashbacks to her own marriage dissolving after she was barren.

As detailed in this review from NJ.com, eventually 2 of the women accept their pregnancies and become pro-life, while the last one tries to force a miscarriage. At the end, she’s forced to deliver twins, while the other two women each get one baby.

Then things get really fucked up:

Later, Staci wakes up. The two new mothers are no longer captives, they’ve presumably ascended to heaven with their babies. It’s revealed all along the women had been in Purgatory, after having died on the operating table of abortion clinics. But because Staci attempted to miscarry even after a second chance at motherhood, and because she never accepted the error of her ways until she experienced the physical joy of giving birth, of seeing her children for the first time, she will be doomed to eternity in Hell.

Loggia is Satan and he informs Staci she will spend all eternity in a cycle of pregnancy and childbirth and Dr. Wise will forever be her doctor, as the movie’s final twist plays out: Wise too will spend eternity in Hell. She was so weak she committed suicide when her marriage collapsed and must suffer the fate of forever bringing life into the world, endlessly having to appreciate what she did not value on Earth.

That’s right, have an abortion, and Satan will make sure you are continually raped and forced to give birth to babies for eternity, no matter what you want, because that’s all you women are good for. Satan is pro-life, and unless you learn that getting raped and being forced to have a baby is totally awesome, Satan will rape you forever because you didn’t learn that lesson. Rape is moral, because if you accept this rape you enjoy its blessing (a baby) and go to Heaven. This film is remarkably pro-Satan, and the only escape from Satan is to accept what he is doing is right.

In case you haven’t figured out what a nut Del Vecchio is, check out his take on the message of the film:

Del Vecchio added, though he was quick to note he still felt the film’s presentation of the issues was balanced. “I think the audience will walk away not knowing what the filmmaker’s position is, it gives both sides of the coin.”

I’d hate to see what he thought a one-sided anti-choice movie was, but it would probably just be Del Vecchio stabbing people with a coat hanger.

4 comments - What do you think?
Posted by Tars Tarkas - June 7, 2011 at 12:40 am

Categories: Culture Wars, Movie News, WTF?   Tags: , , , ,

Politisink.com is the place to be…

What started as a single random article making fun of some idiots on Resistnet has spawned into a multi-author collaboratorial event that basically took over the blog section of TarsTarkas.NET. Thus, TarsTarkas.NET Blog became the hot new place to talk about politics and what dumb things teabaggers were doing this week. We’ve been featured on CrooksandLiars.com, Huffingtonpost.com, and even helped bring down a crazy Freeper’s Congressional dreams. TarsTarkas.NET shatters dreams for breakfast. We’ve also gotten a crazy legal threat, proving we’ve made it!

As our ultimate goal is self-improvement, it has been decided that the best way for the political articles to prosper is for them to be housed on a blog focused entirely on the political stuff. Thus, Politisink was born! The domain was an older, failed attempt to do a politics blog back in 2006 that I abandoned when I went to grad school. I am sure maybe two people in the world know that, and one of them is married to me. Now, Politisink is repurposed as the new site that will keep an eye on crazy mofos and the crazy stuff they want to do to our country. The Wingnut Web and other political articles will now be posted there (though what has appeared here will remain as I am far too lazy to move everything over) while the TarsTarkas.NET Blog will go back to posting cult movie news, Karen Mok photos, Battle Beast things, and other weird stuff that I see fit (until some other random article balloons up into a cultural phenomenon and takes over the blog again!) Don’t worry, there will be plenty of cross-promotion so those who don’t start checking Politisink out right away can catch up, and for those of you who will skip right by this article because it doesn’t have a picture of a hot chick or posts from morons on message boards in it. Actually, let’s just throw in crazy picture for old times sake!

Frog King not care for your freedoms, only tasty flies!

That’s better! Now, the writers here will be joining us at Politisink, both dm and skiplogic are already contributing away. Soon I’ll try to add on a few more, because, why not? That’s how you become an internet powerhouse and

So in conclusion, check out Politisink.com, where politics circles the drain!

EDIT: Okay, I rewrote part of this because it sucked!

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Posted by Tars Tarkas - May 17, 2010 at 2:02 pm

Categories: Culture Wars, Politicians and Pundits, Privatization, Site News, Wingnut Web   Tags: ,

TarsTarkas.NET and the Lawsuit of Doom!

Just waking up in the morning gotta thank God
I don’t know but today seems kinda odd
No barking from the dog, no smog
And momma cooked a breakfast with no hog
I got my grub on, but didn’t pig out
Finally got an email–

Wait, an email??? Uh-oh!

TarsTarkas.NET: Slander in your blog

This is an enquiry e-mail via http://tarstarkas.net from:
Michael Beckham

http://www.tarstarkas.net/2010/01/21/wingnut-web-dipping-into-the-militia-mail-bag/

I’m going to give you guys 1 week to dissolve this thread which specifically targets me, and slanders me as well. I have made screen shots of this blog to present to my attorney. This will be interesting to say the least. Please remove the thread, or I will file suit against you guys for posting FALSE accusations against me. I will also contact the attorney general in regards to this being on the internet. Bringing it across state lines via the internet makes this a federal issue. I’m asking nicely. Thank you

No, not slander!

Okay, fine, I’ll check it out. A quick look at the post in question shows that it is impossible for anyone to not realize statements made were jokes about Michael Beckham. Considering Michael Beckham was the one who went public and posted tons of information linking his name to child molestation charges, even if they aren’t true, then Michael Beckham shouldn’t be upset when people start Googling “Michael Beckham” and “child molester”. If I started to claim that I was made of maple syrup, people are going to google “Tars Tarkas maple syrup” and joke about it, and then I can’t sue them for “slander” because they’re believing it.

But maybe Beckham has a problem with some of the comments, in which case he should get a life. Several of them point out what kind of character Beckham is, others are posts of emails from the militia dudes Beckham is feuding with that seem to collaborate parts of what the others are saying. The rest is just the comments of the popcorn eaters enjoying the show.

Now, Micheal Beckham is a member of the Well Regulated Militias board (aka the WRAM guys) who were briefly our targets as they were involved in a bunch of infighting and filling up our inboxes with various conspiracy theories about how the government was infiltrating them and their infighting that caused the group to splinter into pieces. That’s what I get for joining random Ning sites advertised on Resistnet.com. Eventually, we got bored as more hilarious targets presented themselves, and left the WRAM guys to go play armyman in the woods with their toy guns.

Our mistake. We should have never stopped reporting on the goings on of the WRAM guys, because they are still hilarious! So expect more WRAM stuff soon.

So I guess TarsTarkas.NET will now be shut down by US Attorney General Eric Holder, and we’re all gonna get sued for slander. Which is awesome because even if we made actual charges designed to hurt Micheal Beckham’s reputation and not sarcastic jokes in response to his own broadcasting of his junior high school drama, it would be libel. Luckily, EFF.org has got our back, and as we are all brainwashed Obots Eric Holder is well aware of us and we are on his payroll. But now TarsTarkas.net has finally arrived and gotten a lawsuit threat, just as we’re about to announce the politics-only spinoff site Monday.

I have received no reply from Mr. Beckham when I told him no, but any updates will be reported. Until then, remember the knights templar. If anyone wants Eric Holder’s autograph when he comes to arrest me, let me know in the comments!

Dr Teeth

6 comments - What do you think?
Posted by Tars Tarkas - May 15, 2010 at 2:01 pm

Categories: Culture Wars, Site News, Wingnut Web   Tags: ,

Wingnut Web and the Husband Who Invented Everything

Boy, Resistnet.com sure attracts the smartest people in the universe. Just check out what the “grassroots” organization’s typical member is capable of, and you will realized us liberals are doomed. DOOMED!!!

Yep, a 190 IQ, self-taught quantum physics, and universities pay him to build stuff for them.
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FYI, to have a 190 IQ is so rare it is literally about 1/1,000,000,000. Yes, that is 1 in a billion.

But wait!

Helene and her husband have the power to convince anyone anything political because of magnets, and they REFUSE to work for IBM! Refuse!
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Her husband invented everything ever
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Her husband invented oxygen. Her husband invented Robocop. Her husband is the Chuck Norris of inventors.

He also invented it all for free!
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Her husband knows your name and address. Her husband travels around the country and punches readers of TarsTarkas.NET in the nose. In fact, her husband is outside my door right now..
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All geniuses talk to ghosts. Einstein wouldn’t stop talking to Napoleon.
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Mary Patterson also has a 190 IQ husband who knows everything!
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Also, when the Chinese broke into his computer he called NASA to warn them, because the Chinese would really target some random guy and NASA would really care that they did.

As you can see, this level of unstoppable supergenius cannot be countered by us Liberals, so we might as well give up now. This stuff is all true, and there is no way that the only thing invented was the lies her husband told her.

14 comments - What do you think?
Posted by Tars Tarkas - May 9, 2010 at 9:17 pm

Categories: Culture Wars, Wingnut Web   Tags: ,

Machete f'ed with the right Wingnuts

Machete started out as a fake trailer in the Tarantino/Rodriguez movie Grindhouse and soon will be its own movie (along with fellow fake trailer Hobo With a Shotgun!) Robert Rodriguez released a special preview trailer on AICN to celebrate Cinco de Mayo, and the trailer is awesome. We got Danny Trejo, Jessica Alba, Robert DeNero, a special introduction, and more random stars than you can shake a machete at. And a million machetes. You would think everyone would be happy about this trailer, as awesome films please everyone. You would be wrong. To capitalize on the recent news, there is a special message at the beginning of the trailer saying it goes out to Arizona! This has ticked off a bunch of morons on FreeRepublic.com, and now we have our fun! We also pulled quotes from the original FoxNews article FR was linking to. Keep in mind that Fox is distributing the Machete film, so they have an special interest in keeping the movie’s name in the news, even if the way to do it is to have some right wing hack write a column filled with inaccurate information to make the wingnuts angry.

Actual title of the article, thus starting off the fun!
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“Machete – true to life” – Tom Tancredo
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Only liberals swear!
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Mexicans are dumb and heartless!
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Machete will turn America into Conservatopia!
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Vague threats are just another fact of life on FreeRepublic.com!
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Machete is the first shot in RaHoWa 2010!
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I’m OK with the race war that’s totally in my bigoted mind!
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Gay joke out of nowhere!
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Mexicans will bring guns, unlike us, who have totally not been repeatedly saying how good we are with guns in every other post in this thread!
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Guy complaining about violence in a movie while his sig leads to a site where you write fan fiction about shooting minorities and liberals.
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What?
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Machete – a tool of psycho druglords
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Machete naturally leads to black guys raping white women as political statements. Looks like someone’s daughter married a black guy!
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A less-insane freeper rises to the challenge of ansel12
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ansel12 responds with hilarious irony!
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Every crime ever committed by a black on a white was because of Shaft!
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Obama passed Arizona’s laws and then made Machete as an excuse to kill conservatives
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Funny how everyone hates Jessica Alba all of a sudden
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ansel12 is going off the racial deep end
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Young people mimic everything in movies. Just last week I robbed billions in gold while sending the cop who killed my brother on a wild goose chase. But that’s another hobby of mine…
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CodeToad ready to attack Mexico again over a movie.
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Let’s form our own country and start a violent civil war over a movie!
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Wesa gonna die?
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AuntB sure hates the troops for a conservative…
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Wait until this guy finds out that the “mexkins” are mostly Indians!
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Do you get my metaphor? Should I imply I want to shoot people more clearly?
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Cool, an A. Wyatt Mann cartoon! Totally not racist!
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Ask the Indians…about us…who are being invaded by Mexicans…who are Indians…
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All set for Race War 2010 Predator 3!
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wku man is ready to rock and roll! And shoot everyone.
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Time to invade Mexico!
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Machete – Somehow Obama’s fault! Let me show you my images of violent Blacks for no reason except to ranch up the racism!
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Wal-Mart is filled with Mexicans…but I still shop there!
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So let’s go to the original story on FoxNews.com….which has comments!!!!

Throw out 30% of the country!
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Money for nothing and chicks for free!
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Why won’t the government investigate this movie and all the violence it isn’t causing???
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Someone needs to change his diapers!
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Obama caused Machete
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Let’s indiscriminately murder Mexican citizens because of a movie.
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Are we still talking about Machete?
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Like Jesus would do!
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Yep, just read every post above this one!
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Assassinate everyone because of Machete! Way to get past moderation on FoxNews.com
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Machete is the Real Racist!
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Nuke Mexico cuz of Machete! Also the Alamo will be different? Does this supergenius know that they LOST at the Alamo?
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Lock and Load! But we are peaceful!
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poindexter? Welcome to 1959!
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Another guy who doesn’t remember what actually happened at the Alamo.
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taco bending m.a.g.g.o.t.s are the Real Racists!
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SSShhhhhhhhhhh!!
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The dirty little secret is deep in their hearts all Mexicans want to kill you dead! I know it’s true because I made it up myself!
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day in and day out
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Why is Robert Rodriguez the only thing not all-caps? I am guessing because he copy-pasted it.
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Muslim Terrorists are coming in through Cuba! I know, I saw it on the internet!
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Taco Bell is now out $3.00 a week.
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Well, assuming we don’t nuke Mexico and start WW3 over Toy Story 3, Wingnut Web will be back…soon!

1 comment - What do you think?
Posted by Tars Tarkas - May 7, 2010 at 1:06 am

Categories: Culture Wars, Movie News, Wingnut Web   Tags: , ,

Arizona Nazis

Arizona is like the Roadrunner and Non-Racist America is Wile E. Coyote. That’s the only explanation I can think of for the recent activities of our friends in the Grand Canyon State.

First of all, the draconian Immigration Bill was passed, basically making it legal for cops to demand proof of citizenship from anyone they suspect might be an illegal immigrant. Which means anyone brown. Telling people to “show me your papers” is sooooooo American.

Then we find out the bill was co-written by a lawyer for an actual Nazi! Lawyer at FAIR’s Immigration Reform Law Institute Kris Kobach was the co-author of the Arizona law. The Federation for American Immigration Reform (FAIR)founder and current board member John Tanton is a noted Nazi propaganda distributor.

Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio has a lot of neo-nazi fans, he even poses with them for pictures!

Sheriff Joe Arpaio’s immigration raids have made him a hero, he even briefly considered running for governor before he realized that was a fast track to getting charged with crimes from the investigations now underway.

Oh, and he also forced a woman to give birth while in shackles. No wonder the teabaggers love him!

Repubican Arizona State Senate Majority leader Chuck Gray has been caught following Stormfront and a second hate group (ScarecrowWPWW) on Twitter. He claims to have no idea how that could have happened and is now unfollowing them. Right. Does anyone believe anything Republicans say anymore?

What America needs is Blues Brothers 3: I Hate Arizona Nazis.

Be the first to comment - What do you think?
Posted by Tars Tarkas - May 4, 2010 at 2:59 pm

Categories: Culture Wars, Politicians and Pundits, Wingnut Web   Tags: ,

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