Get grabbed by Bermuda Tentacles on SyFy!

Bermuda Tentacles SyFy Asylum

Holy guacamole, SyFy Saturday Creature Features are returning! You might have noticed how we haven’t mentioned a SyFy Original Movie premiere at all in 2014, and that’s not because we’ve just been too darn lazy to write about them. It’s because there hasn’t been any! Until now! April 12th will be the first of the year, with Bermuda Tentacles! Asylum are the people to thank for this masterpiece, starring Linda Hamilton.

When Air Force One goes down over the Bermuda Triangle, the Navy sends its best rescue team. But in saving the President, the team awakens a monster which threatens America’s entire Eastern Seaboard and, ultimately, the world.

A nice return to the monster mayhem. The only image so far of the monster make it look like Doctor Octopus’ tentacles have come alive! I’ll also make the required “Why isn’t this tentacle monster near Japan?” joke that everyone is thinking. Now you have to come up with an all-new joke, buddy! Never fear, Jamie Kennedy will be in the film as well. I’m not sure if he’s the monster or the president or a tentacle, but Kennedy is a master of disguise and will probably play all three roles.

Hopefully this will lead to more SyFy Original Movies airing, or else I’ll be stuck writing about Lifetime Channel (which isn’t that bad…) The ratings for original movies last year were not spectacular (though you could argue moving them to Thursdays also didn’t help!), even Sharknado didn’t get killer ratings until the second of third time it aired, despite huge social media awareness. The solution is to be a Nielsen family and get the ratings for SyFy. Or, find someone who is a Nielsen family, and then eat them to become them, and then watch Bermuda Tentacles. It’s really the same thing, because us average Joes don’t count.

via SyFy

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Written by Tars Tarkas

Tars Tarkas

Runs this joint!